Upset with office convo - no way they could have known

[FatAndFurious7]

I'm not really looking for advice, just want to rant.
I'm one of the youngest in my office (in early 30s) and virtually everyone else has children.
A massive debate broke out (good humoured) yesterday about what time of year it's best to have children so they'll excel or so you get the best time off etc..

Me and DP have been ttc for 8 months now and just came on af this week... again. None of them know this so I'm not directly annoyed with them just so down about our ttc struggles and would love to have the 'problem' of deciding when in the year to give birth.

Anyone else in a similar boat and have stories they would share about this sort of thing?

I feel your pain - there's often similar discussions and people just have no idea what those around are going through.
My sister in law 'struggled' to get pregnant - she fell pregnant on month 3!!!
err 3 months isn't struggling! We've been trying for 6 years!!!

Yes. I understand how you feel.

They were talking about age gaps between children the other day. ‘Oh no! You don’t want too big an age gap.’

My DD is nearly 6yo and I have been desperately TTC for a year. We weren’t in a position to TTC before and now the gap is just getting bigger and bigger.

Thanks for your replies. I'm so sorry you've both been having struggles
My 8 months seems to pale in comparison!

I genuinely dont get annoyed with people when this sort of this comes up because it's purely innocent but I just came home and couldn't get it out of my head and really got to me.

Ttc is brutal!

I started to really feel it at 8 months in to TTC. I posted a thread about it and was told I had no right to feel like I did because others had been TTC longer than I had.

I will say that the TTC process is awful. It’s possibly the worst I have ever felt before. Don’t feel bad that it’s only 8 months. Your feelings are valid.

I totally understand what you mean.
I have no children, TTC for a year, had 2 MMC at 12 weeks this year. Someone in the office recently made a comment about how I get to do my hobbies in the evenings and weekends because I have no children, unlike them, who have children so have to do stuff like watch them play football on the weekends etc (oh boo hoo..poor them! how awful to watch your own child. I would love to be in that situation)

They made the comment at the stage when I knew I was miscarrying and was waiting for my appointment for medical management. I know they weren't to know that, but I wish people were just careful about what they say and not assume that every woman without a child is child free by choice.

Being (funny name) thank you so much for your post. I totally feel put in my place sometimes by people who've been trying much longer and of course I sympathise with all my heart but it makes me feel worse like I'm not allowed to mourn my own lack of success. Thank you for validating my feelings and I'm so sorry you've struggled too.

Bee I share your pain, and these comments are so innocent that it's tough to contain a reaction. Sometimes I want to just smash the mug I'm holding or upturn my monitor or shout fuck off at the top of my lungs but then have to remember I live in a civilised society(mostly) and it isn't the done thing