Had enough of this...

[kylieeee]

This isn't one of those 'can you see a line?' posts, it's just me taking my frustrations out on yet another stupid BFN FRER. I've lost count of how many of these I've done over the last few months, but I'm sick of the sight of them.

Every single cycle I stupidly let myself believe this time we've been lucky. Heck, even my friends at work asked me when I'm planning on having a baby today and I gave a cheeky wink at one of them because I felt so sure of myself this month.

I can't take much more - it's emotionally freaking draining and I'm sick and tired of constantly being slapped in the face by that stupid single pink line.

I don't know what I'm hoping to achieve from this post but I feel like throwing in the towel and just going back on the pill, I can't take month after month of this heartache 😔 i know I'm being dramatic but come on - no one ever tells you how hard it is TTC. They all make it sound so exciting and it's just not..

I know that feeling too well. So frustrating. Every month another round of BFNs. It's really draining.

Have you had a look at the "Up Yours to TTC" thread on here? It's good for a rant.

@Bezalelle I know stressing over it doesn't do any good but how can we not? It's such a punch in the gut when your doing everything you can and it's one BFN after another. How people get BFP after one night stands is beyond me. I feel like I could DTD all day everyday for the next 40 years and I'd still never have a BFP sounds like a good thread for me. Thank you for the tip xx

@kylieeee how long have you been ttc for?
Honestly you sound like I did. I was going absolutely crazy. Each month I’d test like a maniac and each month it would be BFN. It completely took over my life and I became so depressed about it as I felt everyone around me was getting pregnant. I had diagnosed myself as being infertile and genuinely could never see it happening. Then in May I took a test and it was positive. I was shell shocked. I’m now 29 weeks. What I’m trying to get across is please don’t give up hope and if it can happen for me it can happen for you.

Yes @kylieeee don't give up. What cycle are you on? I've seen hundreds of posts on here about people getting pregnant when they have stopped trying and relaxed a little bit (easier said than done I know). Stress and pressure really seems to have a negative impact - it's hard to believe because there isn't any science behind it but there must be some truth to it!

Was just saying that earlier @Bezalelle it's a miracle people get pregnant from one night stands. I had absolutely no idea that you are only fertile one week of the month until recently. They don't teach you that at school 🤣

@Bezalelle meant to tag @kylieeee but hi to you too 😊 how long have you been ttc for?

Hi Rara.

I'm on my 6th cycle of TTC, which I know isn't very long really, but I'm 38 and starting to worry.

Being long-distance with DP at the moment isn't helping, but we've DTD like clockwork throughout my fertile periods since June. Feels like we're doing everything right, but not a whisper of a BFP.

So disheartening isn't it. I'm only on cycle 2 so I'm not complaining yet but I felt like I timed everything perfectly last month so the bfn shocked me (naively).

Do you track ovulation? Have you tried preseed, smep and all the other tricks people mention on these posts?

Don't worry, plenty of people get pregnant at 38! Is this your first baby?

No one preps us for this kind of disappointment do they!! I used to take the morning after pill after missing a few pills back in the day 🤣 if only I'd known!!!

This has been cycle 3 now so I know I'm still early days. The thing is, me and my fiancé wanted to wait until we were in a position to buy our own home before TTC so I feel like I've waited so long already. Every month that goes by just reminds me of the time I'm not spending as a mummy 😔

@kylieeee - step away from the tests. If you want a baby- why go back on the pill. Imagine you are not trying at all, just don't take that pill- you will se it soon will happen. It's the pressure and stress and worry that is not helping. But seriously, imagine you have decided not to try anymore, just simply not take the pill. That's it. Good luck 🌻 Cycle 3 is just sooo early.
I got pregnant on my cycle 1, but it ran away from us as soon as it started. 75% pregnancies end up being miscarriages, majority in the 1-2 weeks therefore you don't even know if you were pregnant or just had your af.

When your body and mind are ready- it will happen. Stress less

@kylieeee if you don't already take it try CQ10.

We were trying for 13 months and the first month I took it I finally got my BFP. Unfortunately that ended in a MC.

First cycle since I started taking it again and I've got another BFP.

Luisa Zissiman has a blog about it. She was recommended it by a fertility specialists. She's also got a highlights on her instagram full of messages from people having said they took it and also conceived.

It could be total coincidence but may be worth a shot if you've tried everything else.

It's incredibly hard, especially if you're impatient like me.
What helped me was that I knew I was doing everything I could so I didn't have the 'I should've done this or that!' That being said, I did this when coming off the pill before ttc (6 months). I started temping, learned a lot about my cycle, took Agnus Castus (which is a herbal fertility support) and read 'the bible' - taking charge of your fertility by Toni Weschler. And it had me understand so much of what was going on....

@SunnyFlover honestly, I tell myself every time I'm not going to take one until AF is late but I just let curiosity get the better of me every single time. I know I'm doing myself no favours and all it does is make me feel worse but I just can't help wondering - I need to stop don't I. I didn't mean it when I said about going back on the pill, I said that mid strop lol. It's a good idea to just pretend we're not trying though. I'm sorry to hear about your MC, I can't imagine how hard it must be having your hopes dashed so quickly. Thank you for your kind advice.

@GingerRH I haven't heard of that but going to google right now.  to you for your MC also, but congrats on your recent rainbow BFP💗

@Peanutty86 it's so emotionally draining isn't it! I suppose every cycle is a learning curve xx

@kylieeee I felt this way last month in the TWW, I was staring at the tests for ages and taking pictures and trying to see a line it's a really low feeling, I think we've all been there. Sometimes I'm glad when AF arrives as it's onto a new cycle. Sending you baby dust i hope you get your BFP really soon!! Xx

Big hugs... I know how hard it is. We spent a year trying and nothing. Id even asked the gp to refer us for testing (oh has varoceles which can affect fertility)
Then i started having symptoms even though I'd had AF and it was positive, i was made up! Unfortunately a week later I had pain and had to have emergency surgery as it was ectopic. That night was the lowest point of my life- id had to agree for them to kill my baby to save my life and i lay there hearing other women in labour thinking that there was no chance in hell it would ever happen to me now I only had one tube. But it did, and 2 years tomorrow we are taking our little one for a family day to remember our first.
3 cycles or even 12 feels forever right now... but when it happens and you get your bfp it will feel like the blink of an eye. When we had our early scan to check all was ok I remember thinking s**t im not ready for this even after all that time preparing myself for it!