AF arrived on cycle 11. Losing hope.

[bluevelvet1]

Af has just arrived on my 11th cycle. Feeling pretty numb. We have been trying since January with not one sniff of a positive test. I have a 28 day cycle, ovulate every month and keep to a healthy weight and diet. We have also conceived before, quickly. I’ve made an appointment at a fertility clinic, but feeling so down about it all. Does anyone have any success stories of conceiving after 1 year or any advice? Thank you for reading and sorry for rant.

@PlanBea that good to know that the wheels are in motion. I'm cd40. I took a Wilkinson test today and the normal line wasn't even in the right place.l, it was practically by the plastic edge. Rubbish. I binned it. Positive OPK today though. Maybe all this is my body trying to ovulate again. I'm just seeing what happens. Doctors next week anyhow for me too. Good luck

@Mycrazylife85 not to get your hopes up but my friend felt pregnant but didn’t have a pregnancy test so she took an ovulation test and it was positive and she was pregnant🤞

I'd heard that too @bluevelvet1 but I don't know. I'm in a strange place of feeling quite relaxed about af not arriving. The only thing that has bothered me is the lower stomach discomfort which always makes me panic despite me having it in and off before. Years ago I suffered awfully with uti's and the discomfort of IBS with the pressure on the lower stomach always gets me panicked. Even 10 years on. Thankfully it's a tiny bit better today. My nipples are tingly but my skin is spotty. I really can't call it. I'm playing it that af will arrive

@Mycrazylife85’m sorry you’ve had to suffer with IBS, can that affect fertility. I’m glad it’s getting better. How long have you been trying for?

13 years ago i was in your position OP. It took us 13 cycles to fall and I was loosing hope. In fact i only took the pregnancy test ad previously my period had arrived the day after a negative test and so i was at the point I was just getting through the months before going to see the Drs then i fell pregnant.

For us I'm pretty sure we just weren't having enough sex. Within a year of having our first we started trying for our second and we tried a method called sperm meets egg (i think, it was 11 years ago). Essentially you have sex every other day from finishing your period then every day around ovulation for 5 days then skip a day then have sec again.

We fell pregnant the 2nd time on our third cycle. Of course it could just be that i was still within a year of giving birth and nothing to do with the above.

Good luck everyone trying to conceive

@bluevelvet1 I don't think it does, I just get flare ups. Incidentally stress doesn't help, and sometimes certain foods. I scale off the pill in January, I'm 34. How long for you? My tests have arrived but I've been feeling strangely stressed and in emotional upheaval this afternoon. Funny this morning I said I felt surprisingly chilled. Left work an hour early again today, I can't hack the pace I'm shattered (thank goodness for flexi) and I had some darker cream/very light brown cm today. I've never missed a period following a positive OPK but am aware it's likely I just didn't ovulate and it's coming. Then I have a little panic that I could be, then panic that I panicked because that would be ungrateful, then panic that must mean I'm not ready, then worry about the above. 😞

Hi @siriusblackthemischieviouscat thank you for sharing, that haS helped. I’m really trying to get my head out of a negative state of ‘it will never happen’. Will try the demo or just go for lots and lots of sex! We conceived 5 years ago so hopefully it can happen again 🤞

We have been actively trying since January, I came off the pill Sept 18 to regulate my cycle (and my cycle went straight back to normal) and we used protection until January, no idea why now! So it’s really starting to feel like a long time! I’m 27 and hubby is 34 (35 next week). Have you tested yet?

@PlanBea thank you! And good luck with your referral.

@bluevelvet1 is there any reason why you’ve missed only me out? We are so similar, especially our partners who smoked during tic first time around. It’s so frustrating now. I’ve tried everything, even giving up and relaxing, yoga, vitamins, meditation etc....

*ttc

Hi @VenusTiger so sorry I missed you! It’s so frustrating, especially coming up to 1 year + of trying as I just feel my chances are getting slimmer. Where are you in your cycle atm? Has your hubby had a SA?

@bluevelvet1 just seen your post and thought I'd comment to try and give you some hope.

I game off my pill in April 2018 after being on it for 15/16 year without a break. We started TTC in August. In April this year I went to the Dr's for fertility tests as I was stressing so much about not falling pregnant (my partner has a child from a previous relationship so I know he's worked in the past - so every month I was adamant it was me not working). All of these tests came back as perfectly normal. I STILL DIDNT FALL PREGANT.

So come June/July I honestly gave up trying. It was causing me so much heartbreak and stress. Fast forward to August and we found out that we were finally pregnant- I found out the day I was due on so would have been 3W6. I had a miscarriage on 5W6. This went on for a solid month as it didn't fully pass so I was in an out of the EPU.

It took until October for AF to arrive. I did a test on Monday and I've had another BFP. Fingers and toes crossed this is a sticky one.

Please please please do not get dishearten. It will happen. And I for one know it's easier said than done, but try not to 'try' too hard.

Also, I did a lot of research on ways to improve fertility and saw a lot of people quoting Luisa Zuissman and her blog post. She recommends taking something call CoQ10. I started taking this in July and fell that month. I've also taken it since my cycle in October and have fallen this month.

It could be entirely coincidental but might be worth a shot.

Hope this settles your mind slightly. X

CD42 and 17dpo. I'm having a really tough time mentally with this. A negative PT this morning, I was certain it would be positive.

Feeling tired, very nauseous in the afternoons for three days and tingly boobs. My nipples appear fuller if that is a thing.

I have actually struggled because I thought I was pregnant with feeling panicked (not by this but potentially the change on dynamics in our relationship) I cried to my husband that I was sad that I was feeling panicked after all we had spoken at great length about this decision and I've been taking my vitamins and supplements/tracking my cycles. It's most likely down to my parents being married for nearly 20 years and divorcing after I was born. We are not my parents I know. I now feel sad and emotional now I have a negative that I was panicking. And ungrateful and deserving of a negative.
Honestly I feel an emotional mess.

Hi @bluevelvet1 it took me and my DH a year to conceive. We were DTD at all the right times, OPKs etc etc. The cycle I got pregnant we used pre-seed but only DTD once as it was a big birthday for me and we were so busy celebrating etc. I honestly think because I wasn't feeling the pressure and stress (and probably DH too!) it happened.

That being said, people kept telling me to relax and not get stressed which is easier said than done!

Lots of baby dust to you for this cycle xx

@bluevelvet1 I’m on cycle day 5 today - finished af yesterday and it was 2 days late typically!
My DH doesn’t want to have SA - he doesn’t want to go any further than me getting checked out, as that was my decision and he says it’ll just stress him out. I can’t force him to so it is what it is. Frustrating but hey ho.
Just don’t know where to go from here - I’m not getting any younger. Really do feel like giving up though in all honesty.
Loft full of my son’s stuff which I insist on keeping and a spare room which I refuse to do anything with just in case - it’s a horrid limbo feeling.
Do you think I should chase docs on scan referral - I was referred for one on 20 Sept - surely I should’ve heard by now?

@Mycrazylife85 sorry yesterday was so rough. How are you doing today? CD46 today and not a hint of AF. In my crazy moments I've decided I've gone through menopause at the ripe old age of 32 and that's why I've not ovulated and why my period has now stopped. Fertility does just send you round the bend!

Hi @PlanBea thank you for your message. 19dpo and I had such a vivid dream last night I was pregnant. FRER says no. I'm not doing another but have the doctors Monday anyway. I feel an emotional mess. I thought I was in with a chance (and then panicked a bit as I always envisaged a struggle,which I felt awful for but then was thankful I may not have to do). Turns out this is probably the start of a journey I always thought I'd be going on with having pcos. I am hopeful I can get bloods done soon. Off for a shower and a small cry. Thankfully WFH today. Good luck all you lovely ladies x