What is the best intended, but worst/annoying unhelpful advice you received for TTC?

[sojo44]

Mine is: just relax, wait, and it will happen.

Yes, if I had a regular cycle, could track ovulation each month and knew everything was 'normal', it may put me at ease. But being diagnosed with PCOS, not sure how regular (if even) I ovulate and waiting months on end for AF to come, this 'relaxing' waiting game isn't the same.

So let off some steam and let me know yours.

Just relax and it will happen 🙄🙄🙄

You should go to church more 🤦‍♀️

"Relax" is so annoying! How is it even possible to relax when it's such a massive, all-consuming process? Even more annoyingly, it's usually said in a breezy tone by wafty women who have a brood of nippers conceived by accident.

That is the worst, @sojo44 - I used to inwardly seethe when people said it to me.

I have no eggs of my own and went through a really early menopause. "Relax and wait" was never an option . . . 😒

@ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia haha! Exactly that! 🙈

@itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted omg!! What the actual!! I haven't had that one yet! 🙈 such constructive advice 😂

@Bezalelle yes!! The "relax" comments I've had so far have all come from people who were lucky enough to conceive on their first try.

@RedPandaFluff oh gosh! I'm so sorry! Big hugs your way! It's definitely making me seethe a little as well. People seem to forget how different we all are and advice like "relax" can sometimes do more harm than good!

Just have sex every other day, no need to try and time it.
Anyone who’s says this needs to have the odd 40+ day cycle and see how they like it. I work full time, have a 4 year old and irregular cycles I don’t have the time or energy for that nonsense. Thank god for ovulation sticks.

Just adopt.

When we found out DH is infertile.

Fuck. Off.

@sojo44
Yup! That was from my mother!

Also this gem from her ......are you having enough sex (because I hadn't thought of that one! 🤔) - your father and I were at it all the time when we were trying to get pregnant 🤦‍♀️

“just go on holiday”.

Yup. Because DH and I have sooooo much sex when sharing a hotel room with 3 yo DD.....

But seconding “just relax and it will happen”. I’m pretty sure I do actually need to have sex with DH and that vaguely coincide with ovulation, so “just relax” doesn’t cover it if he’s away when I ovulate (this happened several cycles in a row, which was bloody frustrating)

@MunchyMunchkin here here!! I'd like to see them do it in a similar situation! My last cycle was 120 days - no chance! 🙈

@TwattingDog Oh gosh that's awful!! And such "helpful" advice as well during a hard time!! Fuck off indeed!

@itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted gah!!! Haha, really you need to have sex? I thought the stork brought babies! 🙈

@crazychemist haha!! What were they thinking? It's like they think we have the power and decide when we will fall pregnant because we're soooo relaxed now.

I was really berated by one friend for using ovulation sticks. I got pregnant in 4 cycles. It took her 14. Obviously it's not a competition but had I taken her advice I'm sure it would have taken us longer

My mother inlaw- "what did you think we did years ago when I was trying without all these apps and ovulation tests"
Of course meant well but I don't see the problem in charting and checking when your ovulating if you want to.
Oh and apparently me not drinking was ridiculous as well 😆 🤷🏼‍♀️