Hello everyone,
It's been over 2 years since I was last on Mumsnet. My previous partner was abusive, and I found out at 37 years old that I was pregnant (unplanned and on contraceptives). I have always desperately wanted a child, and despite my partner at the time's protests, made the decision to go it alone and have the baby.
Unfortunately I suffered a silent miscarriage which took 3 weeks and 3 different procedures, (operation, chemical and manual scrape) before it could be resolved. During this time I had to endure the abuse from my partner, and I was left traumatised.
I managed to escape and moved away, met a wonderful partener who is kind, supportive and really wants us to have a family.
Last week was my 40th birthday, we started to try for a baby. I'm due to take an early pregnancy test on Bank holiday Monday.
The point of my post is that I am scared that it is too late for me now; I've read the statistics online and they are tough reading, feeling pretty despairing. Also, if I was fortunate enough to get pregnant, I am terrified of losing the baby after the trauma of last time. I'm not sure I could cope.
Please can I hear positive conception/ pregnancy stories from any Mumsnet ladies 40 and over? It would be great to feel like all is not lost and build up some resilience.
Apologies for how many 'I's there are in this post, I know it's pretty self-indulgent but feeling quite panicked right now. Thank you.