Tears :'(

[Mimi91]

There have been lots of tears today 😢

Another pregnancy announcement at a family event. Lots of pregnancy announcements on social media and yet ANOTHER comment today from my in-laws about grandchildren (or lack of).

I am genuinely happy for people with pregnancy news, I really am. Recently I've just been feeling so left behind and alone.

I have had 4 comments this week from colleagues, family and friends about how not pregnant I am and I feel I could just burst into tears each time. It honestly feels like grief.

Anybody else out there having to deal with constant comments?

Hi @Mimi91, so sorry you're feeling this way. I'm in the same boat, married just over a year and the comments are constant. Three pregnancy announcements on Facebook today alone (stupid fathers day) and half my workplace is expecting too. My mum is patiently waiting and very supportive (she knows we're trying) but DH family not so much,telling us to get a move on etc.

Every time AF arrives (she's due to visit again on Tuesday) I spend a good few hours in bed in tears. This weekend I grieved on advance knowing that another cycle has gone by with no success (unless by some miracle I'm wrong). It's so so rough, you're not alone

Thanks so much for replying @Dweebette

I feel better already for writing it all down. DH has been so supportive, but it still feels so lonely.

It's a real tough journey for some of us, but it will all feel so worth it when it happens. ❤️

I think no matter how supportive DH is, it'll always feel a little lonely as only we know how it feels each cycle. We haven't even been trying that long (7 months, 6 cycles) but I feel like a bit of a failure. Stupidly believed what all those teachers taught us in school - have unprotected sex and you will make a baby! I think it's really important to be kind to ourselves and allow ourselves to express our disappointment / anger / frustration /whatever other emotions arise.

@mimi91 I am sorry you’re feeling like this, I can totally relate.
AF is due on sat and I already know it’s coming 😞 I can relate we have been trying for the same sort of time. Why do people feel the need to ask “sooo when are you having a baby.”

Good luck everyone!

@Dweebette I was so naive and thought it would be that simple as in sex education they drill it into you... not so much 😞

@Dweebette snap! We've been trying the same amount of time. I feel a bit silly getting this upset, as there are ppl out there who have been trying for years.

We've been married 3 years (together 10) and I'm kicking myself for not trying sooner.

They really need to teach the facts in school. They drill into you that if you do have sex, just once, at any point in your cycle, you WILL get pregnant 🙄 such lies. Teenage cycles may be a bit all over the place, but they should really give all the facts.

Thanks for talking it out with me ❤️ feels good to get it out. It's not all "positive vibes" all of the time x

@Annie20019 I feel you! It would never cross my mind to ask ppl when they are having babies, it's so intrusive. Ppl just love babies I guess!

Tbf, before we were married, we got the "so when are you two getting hitched?" question all the time! This just feels worse for some reason ☹️ hang in there 🙃

Yeah you’re right, people don’t mean it but it hurts.

Looks like we are all very similar, me and my DH have been together for 11 years and married for 4, wishing we had began this journey sooner too!

I feel your pain @Mimi91

After 16 years together it’s getting quite old. I could put up with the marriage comments as it’s something we have control over but this is a very different thing altogether.

We were at a family party at the weekend where there was a new baby. As soon as I got a wee cuddle the ‘oh it suits you’ and ‘are you getting broody’ trotted out 😞. I even got a ‘see, it’s not that hard’ 🙄🙄🙄

Oh I’m so sorry. I understand your heavy heart.
Sadly people (albeit well meaning) just don’t think. It used to drive me crazy and I swore the next person who asked would get the whole history of my TTC journey warts and all just to shut them up..but I always chickened out.
The worst for me was just getting out of the car from coming back from 2 nights in hospital after a miscarriage and I was carrying my 4 year old. A friendly, lovely neighbour who had no idea where I’d been innocently hollered ‘about time you had another one isn’t it?’ - it was all I could do not to crumble in the street.
At the same time, my lovely sister in law fell pregnant and gave birth a week after mine was due. It is bloody hard. Anyone who has been there won’t say anything like that to you.
It will be your turn, stay positive. xxxx

I know how you feel, last Monday 2 friends announced their pregnancies, one I know how only been trying for 2 months, I found out in work, and took all my strength not to cry, I did have a good cry all the way home though.
It took me all week to start to feel myself again, I could of easily hid under my duvet for a week.

I feel your pain lovely. We've been trying since Jan 2019 so not long but my goodness TTC is so tough and emotionally challenging. I absolutely hate it and genuinely feel like giving up when AF rocks up. I get so upset on period day, I think hormones have a lot to do with how hard I take it. I tell myself that the vast majority of women get pregnant within 2 years so the odds are on our side. I think we're led to believe conceiving is a piece or cake as we are constantly told to take to precautions so it does skew your expectations somewhat. Hang in there, you're not alone. Xx

So sorry OP, very insensitive and rude of people to ask, can’t understand why people do it.

I hope you and others on this thread have some wonderful news to share very soon.

Thanks everyone, all your posts have really helped xx