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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

To wonder, to whinge, and to whine.

49 replies

Shortandsweet96 · 10/03/2019 16:35

To wonder, how did my SIL get pregnant both times on the first go, second pregnancy they only managed to DTD once that month!

To whinge, about how much I bloody hate all the waiting between ttc phases eg. The wait between your period ending and your fertile window, this is literally the worst. Also the TWW turns me crazy, irritable and hungry, like a pregnant lady, only to end up disappointed every month.

To whine, about all the people who announce their pregnancy on Facebook, saying it was an accident, was on the pill, condom broke once. HOW?! I've been actively trying to get up the duff for 6 months, I'm using OPKS, conceptions vitamins, tracking cervical mucus and positive thoughts and I still cant do it!

I spend 30 minutes after dtd every other night, with my arse in the air, myth ir not, hoping the gravity will do me some favours.

How ate some people just so lucky

Anyone else want to moan with me?

OP posts:

juneybean · 13/03/2019 12:05

^ I'm very sorry for your miscarriages, but that post is not helpful at all.

twinkle999 · 14/03/2019 18:22

It’s not really.

Out for dinner with a pal and she’s pregnant.

Pleased for her but urgh.

twinkle999 · 15/03/2019 08:53

I feel real sour this morning. Feel like a total bitch for feeling jealous.

showmethegin · 15/03/2019 11:08

You aren't a bitch @twinkle999 If you were you wouldn't be worrying about it! It's just bloody hard, I know how you feel. I was invited to a baby shower a couple of months ago and just couldn't go. Knew there were going to be 3 pregnant guests too!

We'll get there but it's just hard isn't it.

juneybean · 15/03/2019 11:54

My cousins baby shower is coming up and I feel so horrible that I don't want to go because I am happy for her, but I'm also sad for myself :/

twinkle999 · 15/03/2019 12:14

I really feel bad this morning. I really am pleased for her but I guess she is able to make the announcement I wanted to be making.

Also mutual friends know we are trying and I just don’t want their pity/concern. They all already have children and I am basically now the last childless one. I feel like I don’t want to socialise with any of them just now 🙈 - feel quite isolated at times and like my life is at a totally different stage to theirs.

juneybean · 15/03/2019 12:55

It is a very isolating thing because until you've gone through it, it doesn't occur to you that you could possibly struggle. I started this whole journey thinking it'd work first go because I'd never had unprotected sex before so my eggs will rejoice at all the sperm... 2 years later and am now clinically infertile.

twinkle999 · 15/03/2019 12:58

Yes - I naively thought we’d make a honeymoon baby.

twinkle999 · 29/03/2019 06:57

Resurrecting this one so someone can give me a massive kick up the arse.
Have been up half the night fretting and feel like I want to stop even trying. The rollercoaster of emotion each month is really getting to me.
Three of my group of friends are now all pregnant at the same time and it just feels quite unfair (although I logically know that it’s just how it goes)

juneybean · 29/03/2019 07:16

I'm afraid I can't as I need one too. I cried at work yesterday due to someone's clumsy comment and I feel a right prat.

I also just POAS and for a second thought it was positive but it was just a hair on the test strip so now I feel even worse.

How long have you been trying now?

twinkle999 · 29/03/2019 07:23

Only about 6 months which I know is not that long in the scheme of things. However I am over 40.
And it’s already getting to me. Feel bitter.

twinkle999 · 29/03/2019 07:23

What was the comment?

juneybean · 29/03/2019 07:53

It's utterly outing, I'll PM you x

showmethegin · 29/03/2019 10:49

If one more person says "getting stressed won't help, just relax" I might scream.

Tchelsea · 29/03/2019 11:44

Hi All,

I hope you don't mind me jumping on! Feeling so similar! All of my cousins are ridiculously fertile and all have 2 or more kids and got pregnant very quickly! I'm the runt of the litter, got married after everyone else, the only one who is overweight and the only one who it would seem can't conceive! Been having unprotected sex since October, but only really trying since January so I know it's still early, but feeling like a bit of a failure!!

My friends, DH and sister keep telling me "it'll happen" and I love them for it, but I just want to shout at them and say "WHAT IF IT DOESN'T".

Sorry, I didn't realise the rant I had in me until I started typing!

SpinningSister · 29/03/2019 11:48

I’m not saying his to depress anyone but took me 12 years!

18 months in (2008) miscarriage

Then we just didn’t prevent as due to fertility issues on both sides even IVF would never work apparently

I got a new career eventually then one day realised I felt sick for 3 week. I ended up being 10 weeks at that point I didn’t even notice my period was missing

Sometimes it just takes a while - i was surrounded for years by everyone having kids

But it was when I genuinely isn’t care anymore it happened

I’m not saying that’s easy

twinkle999 · 29/03/2019 12:19

Hi TChelsea - I feel a bit like that too, like I’m lagging behind everyone else. My husband keeps saying we shouldn’t be comparing ourselves but I am finding that hard even though he’s right.

SpinningSister - glad it worked out for you. I definitely don’t have 12 years - that is part of the problem / pressure. I think I have a window of a couple of years before it’s all over (I’m 40).

juneybean · 29/03/2019 19:28

Sadly I can't just relax and see what happens as I'm gay so it needs to be calculated within a day.

whyhaveidonethis · 30/03/2019 08:36

@twinkle999 hope you don't mind me joining you. I'm also 40 and just entered my 7th cycle Ttc. It really does feel like I'm running out of time.

I am lucky that I already have 3 boys but this is #1 with me DP. I came off the pill late September. With my first 3 I fell almost immediately, with DS3 we were using the withdrawal method and only had sex once that month. I thought this would be easy again this time. How wrong I was.

twinkle999 · 30/03/2019 09:22

Hi @whyhaveidonethis 👋🏻

Yeah that’s kind of how I feel - that I’m running out of time so saying just relax or try not to put yourself under pressure feel unhelpful. I don’t have time to relax!

Just feeling kind of sad this morning. Caught up with an old friend last night which lifted me a bit but this morning feel kind of blue. I am not sure my DH knows what to say to me 🙈

juneybean · 30/03/2019 10:30

I don't think tomorrow will help either. Can you and dh plan something nice for tomorrow? Or are you seeing your mum?

twinkle999 · 06/04/2019 17:59

Back again. Struggling.

Seem to have some weird hormonal issues going on so feeling like shit. Have been spotting for over a week, had a migraine last week and just generally feel rubbish. Mistakenly thought the spotting was implantation but that would have been too good to be true 😔

So doctors appointment next week.

Have realised even if I conceived tomorrow I would be 41 before having a baby which I actually just think seems quite unlikely.

Mother’s Day was ok thanks @juneybean - had a nice day with my mum. Hope you are doing ok.

juneybean · 06/04/2019 18:44

I'm glad you had a good mothers day, mine wasn't great as was spotting and finally period started on Monday. I've lost count of the cycles now and honestly feel like giving up and just resigning myself to a life of being a cat-mum.

Fingers crossed for your doctors appointment x

twinkle999 · 06/04/2019 19:26

Cats are great aren’t they though. I have one too 😻

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