NC for this as I’m struggling to verbalise these feelings let alone be recognised by username. I’m TTC no2, one DC 3years. I’m 40 this year so I feel my time is running out. DH is having second thoughts about no2, he’s older than me (46). He’s worried about his age, coping with another generally, money. We did say we’d have two but haven't spoken about it in depth since DC1. Literally all my close friends are expecting babies, some 1st, some 2nd. They are the people I normally turn to in times of need but I don’t feel like I can, I’m so so upset the DH is having second thoughts (to the point where we didn’t “try” last month), I’m struggling massively without my support network because I don’t feel I can tell them the thought of not having another is completely devastating to me when they are pregnant. I don’t have any relationship with my mother. I feel like I suddenly have no one and I’m spiralling. I know if I push DH he will not react well so I need to wait for his doubts to pass, or not as the case may be and deal with it from there. I’ve never felt so lonely, I just put on a face each day and get on with it but I’m so incredibly sad. I literally don’t know how to cope. If DH doesn’t want another child I think I’ll resent him but the thought of splitting up my family is horrifying. I don’t even know what I’m asking really. I hope someone else has been here and come through the other side?