How old is too old? TTC - don't feel 'done'

[Princessmummy2]

Mature mum here, 46, 2 children (6 & 3), conceived naturally, miscarriages in-between and 3 since youngest. Fit and healthy..am I mad to keep TTC? I just don't feel 'done' but don't want to keep putting us through miscarriages (usually at 6-8 weeks). Didn't think I was emotionally strong enough to try fertility drugs but going to speak to GP about clomid. Any tips? Been tested and everything is in good working order . DH is 1 year older, should I get him checked out? Thoughts/suggestions welcome...

In your shoes I would be thinking about my energy levels here. I'm 34 and have just had DC3. Everyone said to me that going from 2 to 3 was the easiest transition. DC3 is by far our easiest baby but life has become so much more exhausting. Instead of dividing and conquering them, they now divide and conquer us (although I remain hopeful that we will learn how to deal with this). It's also become impossible to deal with life admin and household stuff - but then again our youngest is only 3mo. I sense that life will always be far more chaotic and exhausting. Don't get me wrong, it's worth it but it is hard. I know I couldn't do it at 46/47, but then you are not me.

Also think about how you'll feel as you all get older. When they're 18 you'll be 64. I suspect that as you already have young children it's not something that worries you. From the other side, my mum had me when she was 32 and I always felt like I had an older mum. It was hard for me to decide to have a baby at 34 having felt that as a child/teen. I especially struggled as I hit my 20s and many of my friends had parents who were in their 40s and mine were in their 50s and 60s. I had had a sense of being robbed of years with my parents. Times have changed though and people do have babies later in life and so perhaps less of an issue.

I wouldn't have a baby at 46, but that's me. I also wouldn't judge anyone who wanted to, because you only live once and you need to be happy and fulfilled, but I would urge anyone to really think about what 3 would mean for them and the impact to their lives, it's a game changer.

If you already ovulate, clomid won't help. Many (most/all) gps won't give you clomid - this should only be given at the fertility clinic stage.

The multiple miscarriages may be trying to tell you that your egg quality is an issue. I'd suggest reading 'it starts with the egg' as there are a couple of things that can be done to slightly improve egg quality (but not by much).

What a tough thing to be going through. It's not uncommon to get really broody at your age - it may be biology's way of saying it won't be able to happen soon, so crack on NOW. That doesn't mean it'll always work out though...

what a wise message physicskate. i'm ttc #3 at 42 (not far off 43) and have just ordered that book!

OP - only you can know, you're still ovulating though so still in with a chance but I agree about focusing on egg quality. Come and join us on the over 40s ttc thread, there are loads of us ttc ranging from 40 - 48 and between us we are trying every trick in the book and there have been loads of bfps.

I agree with the last 2 posters! I think it depends a lot on when you started your family. I am 43 with an 18 month old and consider it completely normal that I'm TTC a sibling. I see you had your second at 43. If I got pregnant now, I'd be planning #3 around your age too. Join the TTC over 40 board as the advice there is really detailled. I think egg quality is where you need to put your efforts. Order some Ubiquinol today as a first step.

Yes, and for ubiquinol, a water and fat-soluble form absorbs better.
Good luck!