Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Flip

Original poster

Is 37(me) and 38(dh) too old for baby number 2? 7 year age gap...

16 replies

universe83 · 09/01/2019 11:19

Hi Guys

So my husband and I are considering maybe having baby number 2. I am currently 36 but we would need to save for a year to top up my mat pay).

However I would then be 37 and my husband 38 and our eldest would be 6 almost 7 or 7 and is that gap just too huge?

We have also looked at adoption as I had prenatal anxiety and tore badly in labour.

Huge thanks

OP posts:

Singlenotsingle · 09/01/2019 11:25

No of course you're not too old. Women are having babies well into their 40s. How old is Gordon Ramsey's wife? 45? And the age gap is fine, too. The older dc might be a bit perplexed to begin with but he or she will soon get used to the idea and love it. (My dsis had a girl first and then a baby boy, 14 years later.) They are adult now and very close.

mumonthehill · 09/01/2019 11:31

I have a 6. 5 year age gap between my two ds. For us it has been really positive and they both get on. Oldest is now 19 and still does lots of things with his little brother. I found it a bit of a shock going back to baby routine after such a gap but having one in school really helped. It has been positive for us having such a gap so I would go for it. On the birth front, had a horrible first experience but second time was totally different and wonderful!

Original poster

universe83 · 09/01/2019 11:34

Thank you all so very much for input.

It is actually my DS who is desperate for a sibling and pesters me daily and said he keeps praying for one at bed time - it has spurred us on to look at things and think deeply after saying we would be happy with one.

It may all be irrelevant and we may be unable to get pregnant next year so then we would consider other routes but just wanted to get opinions from other ladies and mums.

OP posts:

mrsed1987 · 09/01/2019 11:34

Theres 11 years between me and my brother so the age gap shouldnt be a problem! X

Metalhead · 09/01/2019 11:48

I was 36 when I had DD2, there are 5.5 years between our two and it’s been fine. It can be tricky at times to find things to entertain them both (they’re 3 and 8.5 now) and they wind each other up all the time, but they also play together beautifully and DD1 looks after her little sister when were out at soft play for example.

mumonthehill · 09/01/2019 16:58

Yes, I would say that things like cinema trips etc become tricky but it is surprising how much an older dc secretly enjoys an animated kids film!!!

MrsB899 · 09/01/2019 19:21

There's 7 years between my son and daughter and it was actually nice. My oldest was in full time school when my son was a baby so I got to enjoy the newborn stages and she loved to help out

moleeye · 09/01/2019 19:23

I'm 39, currently pregnant with #2

There will be a 4.5 year age gap between them

Nordicmom · 09/01/2019 19:31

Due to many problems having the second child my DS and DD are 7 1/2y apart but it's been fine so far . For the last few years especially they’ve been able to enjoy lots of activities and days out that interest both and they’ve played together too despite the huge gap . I’m very glad we were able to have her in the end and the gap helped me to be honest because of my chronic illness I could manage with the one baby /toddler much better while my DS was at school and he has later been able to help with all kinds of things ! Now I have just finally started ivf again for one more which is unlikely due to my age but if we’re lucky it’d be yet another similar big gap . Don’t let the big gap stop you if you otherwise want one . My kids are very close and it’s been lovely to see them grow togeher for the past nearly 7 y !

ShalomJackie · 09/01/2019 19:38

No I waa your age for number 2. 9 year age gap!!

littlemimosa · 09/01/2019 20:38

You’re no where near too old! Nature gives us periods well into our late 40s/50s for a reason. Good luck ttc OP.

Original poster

universe83 · 10/01/2019 10:11

Thanks ladies :)
I guess we won't know until we try at the end of the year as I really do want to save to top up my mat leave because we struggled last time and I want to enjoy the next pregnancy if there is one with less financial stress.
My husband is going to obtain a sperm test to see where we stand as on paper we would not have our DS due to an operation my DH had late in life.
If that comes back not great we will go to adoption which we have very carefully considered and it is what we were going to do originally after DS but I have recently thought why not see. We won't be heartbroken if we cannot just wanted to see if I was too old and thinking irrationally.

OP posts:

Littlebelina · 10/01/2019 10:15

I have a similar age gap and was a similar age. Working well so far and as DS is in school it means I don't have to worry about him and can focus on dd

SnowBambino · 10/01/2019 10:16

I had my first at 37. It wasn’t quite what I had planned but until I had a blood clotting disorder diagnosed I struggled first to get pregnant, then to stay pregnant. It took me five years to have DD. It doesn’t feel too old and I’m not the oldest in my NCT group or amongst my friends.
I hope to have a second before I’m 40 if I can convince DH. I don’t think you’re too old by a long way!

huuskymam · 10/01/2019 10:16

I had my last baby when I was 39 and hubby was 40. Wouldn't change a thing. I now have an 9 year old who is full of life and constantly laughing, and 2 sulky teenagers.

Original poster

universe83 · 10/01/2019 16:22

Thanks so much everyone for your lovely input x

OP posts:

Flip