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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

Fear and uncertainty

7 replies

40AndConfused · 28/10/2018 09:01

Hi all

I turned 40 last week...running out of time! Me and partner would like to try for a baby but I'm a bit of a hypochondriac and have always been incredibly anxious about the idea of pregnancy, birth and potential complications. My fears are so intense they could put me off.
The demands/exhaustion/challenges of motherhood aren't nearly as overwhelming for me.

I recently got day 3-5 blood tests in preparation in case I do decide to bite the bullet:-

FSH: 7.7 mlU/mL
LH: 6.9 MlU/mL
Oestradiol: 245.3 pmol/L
AMH 1.7 ng/ml

I've yet to discuss these results with the doc, but I think these are all relatively normal for my age?

And I suppose my next question is, do any of you have issues with anxiety? And if so, how on earth did you cope with being pregnant and giving birth?

Thanks!

OP posts:

Presh12345 · 28/10/2018 12:37

I'm exactly the same. I've just turned 40 and feel time is running out. Have been for all the tests and had femara this month. Went for scan on saturday and have 4 follicles and am going for another scan on Wednesday. I have to decide by Wednesday if we want to try naturally after trigger or whether we want to do IUI on Friday. I worry so much about everything. Mainly health anxiety. I really don't know what to do. I hear your concerns.

CritterTamer · 28/10/2018 15:57

Hi @40andconfused - whilst your FSH level is good your AMH is a little on the low side. My advice would be that if you decide you are going to do this, please don’t put it off too long! Please don’t take this in the wrong way at all as I’m genuinely trying to help, but speaking as a 40yo who struggled to conceive (as many do over 40) and had to go down the IVF route you really don’t want to leave it too long. I have an AMH of 10.4 and it still took 2 IVF cycles and a whole heap of lifestyle changes to get that elusive BFP.

I really wish you the best, whatever decision you make xxx

Lamaitresse · 28/10/2018 16:58

Hi @40AndConfused,
I think those results do look pretty normal for your age. As CritterTamer said maybe try not to leave it too long, but having said that please don’t panic either. I had an AMH level of 0.2 when we were trying to have dc2, but I did eventually end up having a successful pregnancy. When we were given the results the fertility nurse implied that IVF would never work, but that we may as well try it. After dd was born the doctors said that they are increasingly disregarding AMH levels as they do not always give a true picture of what is actually going on. I then went on to fall pregnant naturally twice!
Good luck, and perhaps think about trying CBT for your anxiety if you haven’t already? It has really helped me with different issues.

Original poster

40AndConfused · 28/10/2018 17:09

@Presh12345 Hi.. Thanks for your message. Yes, that's an awful lot of pressure, having to decide by Wednesday which route you want you want to go down. What are the health professionals advising?

Like you, I worry about everything but the most intense anxiety is reserved for health issues. It's exhausting and overwhelming.

Are you getting any support for your anxiety? I started to see a therapist a while back and it's really helping. I would highly recommend it. Working through some of the roots of the anxiety can help diffuse it. Gradually I'm having less panic attacks.

If you're very keen to get pregnant then maybe go straight down the IUI route? Or are you still undecided as to whether you actually want to get pregnant?

OP posts:

Original poster

40AndConfused · 28/10/2018 17:17

@CritterTamer - Thanks for your message. My AMH is 12.3 pmol/L (or 1.7 ng/ml) - all these different measurements confuse things, so I think our levels are quite similar if we're referring to pmol/L?
Yes, you're absolutely right, as you say it gets harder and harder after 40 and I can't put it off any longer - we need to give it a go and deal with the anxieties that come if I'm lucky enough to conceive and maintain a pregnancy.
Huge congratulations on your success with IVF - how's it all going?

OP posts:

Original poster

40AndConfused · 28/10/2018 17:40

@Chintaria - thanks for your reply. Many congratulations on your pregnancies!
Interesting to hear that AMH is being increasingly disregarded - that gives me and others, I'm sure, some hope...
Yes, I might try CBT if the current Gestalt therapy I'm doing doesn't bring about some significant improvements because like you say, I can't leave it any longer. Can I ask how old you were during your pregnancies?

OP posts:

Lamaitresse · 28/10/2018 21:35

@40AndConfused I had dd at 38, then was pregnant again at 39 & 41. They both very sadly ended in miscarriage, but I have been having miscarriages since I was 30 so for me it’s not necessarily an age thing.
It took us 6 years to have dd, so to fall pregnant naturally was amazing! We were both in complete shock 😆

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