AIBU or is he getting cold feet?

[LaurenMay]

So me and my OH don't argue very often (maybe 2/3 a month) but today he was 1 hour late coming home from work and he didn't even bother to call me or message me. I'm at home with the flu today but I spent 3 hours making one of his favourite meals (something in Italian I can't even remember the name of), I planned so it would be ready 20mins after he finished as we live 4min walk from work. But after 45mins I started to worry and called and he said he was on his way but it was busy (we're both nurses).

So obviously when he gets home he gets all moody because I'm mad that he came home so late and didn't even bother to message me. Anyway it turns into a shouting match and then he showered and went to bed without even eating.
I tried explaining to him that I was poorly and I tried really hard to do something for him and he didn't even appreciate it and that I was worried but he wouldn't even listen.

He suggested us moving to a bigger house so that we could have a baby (we have already been trying for a few months). He knows how badly I've wanted a baby for the last few years and he finally agreed to it (I didn't push him to it at all, he suggested it all by himself) and we're planning our wedding for next year but every time we argue recently he says that we're over and either he or I has to move out. And he quite serious about it. It really scares me. He is the one, I couldn't possibly imagine ever being without him.

So why if he is pushing for us to have a baby and get married is he truly threatening to break up and leave?

You should really speak to him about this, no one else can tell you what he's thinking. It's a shitty thing for him to say though, especially when you're trying for a baby.

Bear in mind that you can do something nice but he doesn't have to appreciate it or react the way you want.

He's lashing out. These may or may not be his true feelings. I'd honestly suggest couple's counselling as this sort of communication is not healthy.

Your reaction to him being an hour late is ridiculous. You shouldn't have wasted hours making a meal if you were ill. Equally him threatening to end things is very unfair/cruel.

You need to find out how committed he is with some serious discussions. It would be awful to get a BFP and him to continue with these threats. Good luck 

You had a bad cold. If you actually had flu you would not be able to get out of bed let alone cook.

You had been home all day and were looking forward to him coming home because you were lonely having had no human contact whilst poorly. So you were unreasonably pissed off he was late for the dinner you had made.

DI assume he had no idea that you would be making a dinner for so early.

In the heat of a row he threatened to break up which I assume he didn't mean.

I guess you are feeling more needy because you are unwell but really if him being an hour late is such a massive drama should you be together?