Worried about fertility...

[staypositive19]

Hi, so this may seem a little silly but it's a genuine worry that I have! I'm sure many women worry that they may not be able to conceive but I have a few factors that add to my worry as well as just being a worrier anyway.

So first of all when I first lost my virginity I was quite young and didn't use protection for a good 3 months and never fell pregnant?

The past year I've not been on any form of contraception in terms of the pill or implant but I have been very strict with condom use and made sure every time me and DP DTD, he wore a condom but have recently read there's still a chance of falling pregnant when using this method, but I never fell pregnant?

We have not been actively TTC but have recently (a month ago) stopped using condoms but he has been withdrawing (ultimately we aren't too fussed what happens hence the no contraception) we have just decided to let nature takes its course but we are going on holiday early next year and have decided to wait until after that to TTC but in the meantime if it does happen we aren't too fussed, if that makes sense. But I still haven't fell pregnant?

As far as I'm aware my periods are regular (every 28-30 days) I can have a heavy flow for the first couple of days then by cycle day 3 it calms down, is this normal?

It just worries me that I have seemed to have taken many risks and have never fell pregnant, what are the signs of being infertile and is it normal I have not yet fell pregnant?

Sorry if this seems silly but it's been on my mind a lot recently and any opinions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you

There’s only a couple of days in the month you’re actually likely to fall pregnant, it’s not as likely as we’re lead to believe. You’ve also been using condoms carefully - they’re 97% effective used properly, I don’t know why you’re surprised you haven’t fallen pregnant when you’re using contraception?

It’s normal for it to take a year to conceive when trying, so three months using nothing, not trying and not falling pregnant is not unusual.

I thinks it's mainly because as I mentioned when I first started having sex, for about 3 months I never used anything and then also for the past month I've not been using anything (I know it's only been a month plus he's been withdrawing) but I suppose it is a case of being lead to believe conceiving is easier than it is, I don't know. It's just a worry that I have. But thank you for your reply.

Conceiving a child is a miracle. Yes, accidents happen but there have to be a lot of factors just right to conceive. I wouldn't worry till you've been TTC for over a year.

Look at the chances of ivf or cryo, they drain a lot of follicles, not all have viable eggs in them. Of the eggs most don't get fertilised. Of the fertilised eggs a lot don't live till 3 and even less till 5 days. Of the blasts that survive that around 30% implant, most don't. Of the implanted embryo's not all grow to produce a positive pregnancy test. After that there is the miscarriage rate.

Every baby is a real miracle. It's normal to take up to a year to get pregnant.

We’ve all been lead to believe it’s easier than it is - this is why people are so shocked when they don’t immediately fall pregnant when they try. Your egg is available to be fertilised for 24 hours a month, that’s it. Sperm can live up to 5 days which gives a bit more of a window but it’s really not as easy as it seems. You have nothing to worry about! I’d suggest getting something like Natural Cycles or another temperature taking app and learn your cycle, for preventing pregnancy and TTC - it’s been revelationary for me

How old are you? This is pretty key info.

Thanks for your responses everyone, definitely put my mind at rest but yes like I said I think it's a case of being lead to believe it's easier than it is and especially since I know many people my age who have just 'fell' pregnant without even meaning too, and then I never have so it just seemed weird. And @Blou2 I am only 19.

Please don’t worry. You are young. Even at age over 35 GPs don’t consider any fertility issues unless you’ve been actively trying (which you currently aren’t) for at least 6mths.

I know, I'm just being silly. I'm a worrier anyway and I can't wait to have a baby one day and the thought of not being able too is just so frightening and I was running things through my mind wondering why I haven't fell pregnant by accident like some of my other friends have even though I've been on contraception the majority of the time or I've not been actively TTC. I also worried that I could have some underlying issues that I'm not aware of. So yes I know it's early days and I shouldn't worry, thank you! X