Secondary sub/infertilty buddies

[wouldthatbeworse]

Hello, anyone keen to share a thread to cheer each other on/have a moan about problems growing or completing your family?

I'm so grateful for my DD that I feel bad hijacking threads where people would be so happy to have one child. However, I still feel very sad and frustrated that 10 months down the line I'm not pregnant (had an MC in June). Anyone else out there in the same position? All your mum friends from 1st time on mat leave without you? Feel everyone is waiting for your non-existent news?

Would be great to share hopes, fears and TWWs.

Yes! DM me? X

We've been trying for #2 since last September, had a miscarriage in July at 9 weeks. I love to keep you company on this frustrating journey x

We've been trying for number 2 for 19 months now.
Used to feel sad every time AF showed up. This time I'm overwhelmingly angry!
It sucks!

Welcome everyone. Thanks for not leaving me lonely.

@Kitkatsky hope you're happy to join a small but open thread , but no worries if not, happy to DM you separately

@kintan so sorry to hear about your loss. Are your cycles back? Are you going again or giving yourself a breather?

@Eminen that's a long time. Shitty for you. I'm really sorry

How are old are everyone's DCs and did you struggle for them? Mine is 2.5 and a honeymoon baby. I feel a bit sick about how arrogant I was about how lucky we were. No wait, no stress, fertility issues were for other people...

@wouldthatbeworse Thank you - it really sucked but we are being philosophical about it and trying again already. Sorry to hear that you had a miscarriage too - hope you are feeling ok about it as much as you can. Was hoping we’d caught this month as my period was a couple of days late, but sadly it showed up yesterday!

I know what you mean about not realising how lucky we were with our first child - I got pregnant on the third month of trying, and it was such an easy straightforward pregnancy! He is 20 months old now. With the second pregnancy it took about 8 months of trying, but I was still breastfeeding too so maybe that slowed things down a bit?

Thanks for starting this thread! x

My DD is 3.5. We fell pregnant 5 months after stopping the pill. Stupidly thought it would be that easy again!
I find secondary fertility a lonely place. I feel bad for feeling bad as I know there are many people out there, who can't have any children, and I'm so lucky to have my amazing DD. I just feel so bad that I can't give her a sibling, I don't want her to be an only child, and I'm really struggling with the fact that I may just have to accept that!
Thanks for starting this thread, it's nice to know we are not alone, as horrible as it is so us all to be in these situations!

Hi ladies, may I join you?
My DS is 4y 9m and he was conceived within a month of coming off the pill (we were using condoms too at the time because we hadn't actually discussed having a baby yet 🙈)

We got married when he was 2.5y and thought it would happen again straight away. We've been trying for over 2 years now (I was diagnosed with a blocked Fallopian tube last year after investigations. I had a difficult delivery with my son which is what caused the blocked tube)

AF arrived this morning and I'm just feeling utterly fed up with this all now!

@Eminen I completely understand where you are coming from. I know how lucky we are to have our boy, but I really don’t want him to be an only child. I am really close to my younger brother and I would hate for our son not to have a sibling relationship. It’s so frustrating, I wish someone would just tell me one way or another whether we will have another one! Then we could either make peace with having an only, or know that it’s worth it to keep on trying!

@ArchiesMamaBird Sorry you find yourself in this situation too. I share you feelings of being fed up!

Please may I join you? I have a dd who is five and we only started trying in January this year. I was lucky to get pregnant a few months later however it turned out to be an ectopic and my tube ruptured and needed to be removed. We have been trying since then but with only one tube and irregular cycles I don’t think I can get pregnant easily.
Where is everyone in their cycle? I think I’m 2dpo today.

@archiesmamabird welcome aboard and sorry you find yourself here. Are they able to do anything to unblock your tube?

@charlyn welcome too, that must have been so frightening. I’m sorry for your lost pregnancy too

Echoing what @Eminen said I hope we can all find this a bit less lonely now. I’ve caught myself complaining to someone with primary infertility about it and felt like a real heartless idiot afterwards. I apologised and they were nice about it. Now I can vent it all here instead.

I’m CD 9 so should be coming up to FW. Cycles longer post MC. Tracking with the old £££ clear blue OPKs

DD is 7 and I'm not with her father anymore, but fell pregnant month 2 of trying. Had a miserable pregnancy and time when she was a baby and am now with the most wonderful man who would be a great dad, but we've now been trying 14 months with no luck. I'm older and fatter now, but still only 33 so didn't expect it to be this hard. We have to stop trying at Christmas as DP doesn't want to be too old a dad. I don't think it's going to happen though

@kitkatsky that sounds really tough. I’m sure the time pressure is incredibly unhelpful

Fingers crossed for some BFPs on this thread.

I’m at the flashing smiley stage. Fortunately Since my MC DH has learnt that being too tired is not an option

Thanks @wouldthatbeworse We both agreed when we started trying that we were lucky to have DD from my last relationship and even tho she sees her dad, DP is her real make role model and demonstrates love in a much more positive way. It's just that DP is so amazing withvkids that it kills me he might never have his own baby. And it kills me I might not ever get to enjoy a baby without the threat of it being taken away hanging over me constantly