Is it all worth it??

[Sessy19]

Strong title to get your attention! Sorry. But I’m after some cold hard reality.

Does temperature tracking, ovulation calendars, CM monitoring, SMEP, all the gadgets etc really improve your chances?

I’m reading article after article about the importance of positive thinking, and how so many couples give up with the science after so long and, BANG, two months later, BFP!!

I have read lots of BFP stories here....but the power of positive thinking versus the clinical method...? What say you all?? I’m calm and realistic about my chances. I’m 37 TTC#1, but I can feel myself being taken in by all the tracking and monitoring, when is it time to stop checking and go back to living your life with the TTC cloud over it? Is that even possible???

I’m not sure it’s worth it, there really is no scientific answer that all the tracking works as there is no way of knowing if those people tracking would have gotten pregnant that month despite the tracking.

We’ve been ttc#2 for 18 months now. I’ve given up all the gadgets but there isn’t really anyway of stopping your mind from hoping every month. But it does allow me to be less obsessed and therefore less upset when my period arrives every month.

Anecdotally we tried for 6 years for DD. We conceived the month after we moved house and were so busy that I barely thought about TTC at all. Can’t persuade DH to move house again to replicate the situation so I’ve gone for a new job instead.

Lovely anecdote, good luck with the new job!! 🍀💐
whispers good luck on the ‘other stuff 😉

All the gubbins seemed to only serve to stress me. I tried for almost a year for DD1 and the time it worked was the time we went “back to basics” and just had sex every single day of the month but I stopped tracking and just tried to forget about it.

I think it depends a lot on your sex life. If I knew OH was up for doing it every other day then I wouldn’t bother with OPKs but he can’t (& I can’t tbh) so for me it’s worth tracking!

If you're going to do anything always check your CM as this is the clearest physiological sign of ovulation. I'm one of those people that need obvious signs!

Similar to melamine

we don’t have a huge amount of sex in a normal month and we could go a couple of weeks without it easily. So I do need to know when my fertile window is so we can make sure we have sex during it!

I don’t temp and track and chart though, just do cheap OPKs and know I will probably ovulate around CD18-19.

I think that the stress is a huge factor though. It affects our bodies in so many ways so it must have an impact of his too.

Happy enough for nature to take its course myself...

Didn't bother with temperatures- I just used the Clearblue Digital Fertility Monitor and it takes most of the thinking out of it for you. Worked for me, but I do appreciate it's more complicated than that. Good luck to you OP.

We've tried most things now and I can honestly say that nothing makes a difference, of course therr could be an underlying problems....however I stay positive most months I can usually tell when I'm ovulating anyway so try to dtd a few times around then. On cycle 21 now and hoping it is this month!

Although I’ve been doing all the tracking for about 4mths, I’ve been off contraception since having the copper coil (no hormones!) removed 14mths ago.

We’ve only been officially trying for a few months, but I have been secretly hopeful now for over a year. OH and I have a good sex life, several times a week. I’m just really struggling to be honest.

My period started this morning, the month I had THE most hope....I’m bawling and seriously depressed at the frustration.

I’m panicking that it’s going to make no difference whether we ‘schedule’ the best time or whether we go for pot luck...it probably is time to drop all the gadgets and crap, the hope it builds is making me so sad each month, and since emotions seem to be one of the biggest contributors.....! 😢😢😢

I think tracking can have a negative impact in that sometimes people hold off until they see the positive opk or the temp change or whatever but by then it's too late. You need to have sex about 3-4 days before ovulation to conceive in my experience (appreciate everyone is different though)

Listen to your body. Having fantasies about tom hardy before bed all of a sudden? Go get pregnant. When it's telling you to have sex go for it.

Personally think it can add a lot of additional stress and pressure but I do totally understand it depends on what stage your at & your cycle history etc ❤️ Just had my period and about to try again after mmc at end of July. People keep saying it should happen soon but I’m trying not to put that pressure on myself. Fell pregnant straight away with first but not going to assume it’s going to happen again over night xx

Tracking was negative for me. I was stressed every month and saving sex for around the fertile time. When my husband said he'd had enough and we didn't track and just had normal sex when we wanted we got pregnant that month. Not obviously a correlation but if I was to go for number 3 I would not do tracking and temping and peeing on stocks again !

I got pregnant with iui so I had to track so that there was some clue to my ovulation as you get one try a month and it's expensive .

It's worked for me but then I read on here lots of people get pregnant just being aware of roughly the middle of their cycle and dtd more around that time.

Go with one that will stress you less. If it doesn't work that month you can always change tactics the next month

Good luck and fingers crossed for you xxx