Frustrated with differing advice from doctors when trying to conceive

[Cokerwolf]

I was on the depo injection for 10 years as it was the only thing that could control my PCOS. October 2017 my husband and I decided that I would come off the depo and we would start trying to conceive.

April 2017 I registered with a new doctors surgery, whilst chatting we discussed the fact my husband and I would be looking to start a family soon. The doctor said well once you’ve been off the depo for 3 months come back in to see me if nothing has happened. He explained that as they knew my history with PCOS and long term use of depo it wouldn’t be necessary to wait the usual period of time to start doing tests as they already knew what was ‘wrong’ with me.

So 3 months after finishing depo I go back to see my doctor, he is now on long term sick so I saw a different doctor. I was advised that it was too soon and to come back in another 3 months where I would then be given a series of blood tests and my husband would have to come in for tests too.

Well today another 3 months has past. I saw yet another doctor at the same surgery only to be told that regardless of what I have been told previously I have no choice but to wait for the full 12 month of trying mark. I expressed my frustration not necessarily at having to wait but to be constantly told different advice.

To say I feel deflated is an understatement. Has anyone else had this? I feel like our journey to conception is a total lottery depending on what doctor sees me at the time.

I haven't experienced this myself but I would suggest you make a complaint to the practice manager of the surgery. It may also be worth paying to get your medical notes (cost is around £20 usually) so that you can evidence the different advice you have been given. Its not fair that you are given different advice by different GPs and having the goal posts changed constantly.

GPs are under pressure to save money by not referring people: I would continue to push for a referral.

Thank you for your responses.

I explained to the doctor that I spoke with today that I keep getting different advice and their response was ‘with all due respect I know more than the other doctor you saw as I am the family planning doctor here’ not very compassionate or helpful at all. She also said that I am only 29 not 35 so I shouldn’t be worrying. Not helpful at all!

And yes if the goal posts weren’t moved constantly I wouldn’t feel like I am up and down and disappointed all of the time. x

Frankly, no matter how qualified this GP is, they are behaving unprofessionally, and are not respecting the fact that one size doesn't fit all. The doctor who saw you first may know more about you individually. I think the attitude alone deserves a complaint.

I once put in a complaint against a psychologist who asked me if I had kids and, when I said no, immediately cut in, "So you're not a danger to children then." (I have anxiety) To say there was a shocked response was an understatement and reassured me that I was okay to say I didn't want to see them again.

It's also worth pointing out what stress will do to your chances...

Good luck! Be brave!

Can you book in with another doctor at the same practice or even consider moving practices to get an appointment sooner? In the meantime are you tracking and temping?

Hi,

I have booked in again to see the doctor I saw 3 months ago to see if I get anywhere with them.

Tracking is hard as I haven’t had a period yet and no signs of ovulation with no temp, mucus etc. Trying to keep as calm and as patient as possible as I know that doesn’t help.

I know we haven’t been trying as long as others but I would just like a clear and fair plan of action.

The depo injection can quite commonly cause a delayed return to fertility on stopping, so investigating after three months seems too early.

I would preferentially go back to the same GP for the same problem to get consistent advice. The third GP has a different professional opinion.