Am I expecting too much too soon

[Cali13]

I have posted here before ... But came off pill start of September. Bleeding started at the end and the cycles started at 6weeks then started getting less and less untill the were at a more normal 4 week cycle...
I have an app that says my cycle average is like 32days (it was 28,28,34) and now I'm on cycle day 31.. af still is not here. I'm only tracking ovulation by my cm. It's usually sticky and white and I noticed his month on day22 it was clear and stretchy (while I was on toilet it was stretching the whole way down) so assumed that meant it was he most fertile.
we have been having sex around the middle of cycle and then days after that - trying every other day if we can. I already have a 5 year old DD... And we've been trying since September and I'm really upset that I am still not pregnant. Am I just expecting this too soon. I'm panicking there's something wrong.
I've ordered opk off Amazon and a thermometer. Is it possible to ovulate in day 22 if my cycle is usually between 28-34days ? I did a hpt which was obviously negative .. is that cuz I'm definitely not pregnant or is it too soon if I ovulated on day 22??
I dunno what I'm asking but I'm just really upset and worried .

In a word, yes. You are expecting too much too soon. 6/7 months seems like a long time when you really want something but unfortunately these things can and do take time. My fertility doctor told me 85% of couples will conceive within a year and 95% within 2 years and that’s with no fertility issues. So it’s actually very normal to take up to 24 months to conceive. I’ve been trying for 19 months and after all our tests we were told we are both fine and there’s no reason we can’t conceive. And I have a 9 year old daughter who was conceived when I was on the pill!

There’s most likely nothing wrong with you at all. It’s just taking time. If you haven’t successfully conceived within 12 months, speak to your GP. They won’t see you before then. Also ovulating on CD22 IS possible if you have irregular cycles but generally speaking, there is always 14 days between ovulation and your period, it’s the time between your period and ovulation that can change. So if your cycle length is 32 days for example, you would have ovulated on day 18. If you’re a little irregular, you can give or take a day or two. Tracking ovulation just using cm isn’t particularly reliable.

Cali I totally get you. I stopped the pill last April as we wanted to start trying in September after our wedding. I was obsessed with everything. I read everything I could find to get pregnant ASAP. What I found the most helpful was to get to really know my cycle. I bought the book 'taking charge of your fertility' and started tracking my cycle not only cervix mucus but also temperature Methode. I always had irregular cycles a no idea when I would ovulate. It started off with a great 35 day cycle with confirmed ovulation on day 23. Then nothing. I finally ovulated on day 68 of a 74 day cycle and decided to take vitex to regulate my cycle. Some would say I was too impatient and people struggle and wait for years. Each to their own in my opinion, but don't let anyone talk your fear or worries down because it doesn't matter at what stage you are, it always hurts when another month passes and AF arrives.
Point I'm trying to make is that I would recommend tracking temperature (I used the app Kindara) as this is the only method to confirm ovulation actually occurred and if you're actually late or if your ovulation just happened later. I learned so much by doing this. When we started actively trying I also used a lot of internet cheapie ovulation tests and did them 3 times a day. I know there was a lot of luck on our side and other people try just as hard and still struggle for months and even years but it made me feel better to know that I was doing everything I could. (I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant). I hope you get your BFP soon!

Thank you both SO MUCH for your replies ...I feel so much better already. I just get myself into a panic and thought the worst. You're both so so kind thank you so much. I have got some OPK and a bbt thermometer ordered .. I think cuz with my dd we weren't really trying and I just expected that once we started actively trying it would happen straight away. Thank you so so much. I'll definitely have a look at that app u suggested also xxxx

I would also recommend temping. But something also to consider is timing. You mention trying from mid cycle every other day but that could be too late. Given how long an egg survives, you want plenty of viable sperm in there prior to release so need to anticipate ovulation, rather than wait for it to happen. I'd bring your sex start date forward to say CD10 then once you've definitely ovulated you need only continue a couple of days.

On cd1 now. Get my thermometer and OPKs off Amazon ...any advice for tracking bbt ?? Is it always have to be first thing when I wake up ? Thanks again ladies... Really hoping for a bfp this time xxx

Sorry, only just seen this.

You want to take your temperature at the same time every day (so ideally wake up at the same time at the weekend, even if you go back to sleep!), before you get out of bed. It's important you've not got up yet. And then add to your app/calendar.