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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Make it stop!!

11 replies

Hopingforthebestttc · 18/04/2018 10:55

It’s been over a year of this ttc madness now, and never did I ever think I would engage in the following long term behaviour. Please somebody, make it stop!!

Halfway through foreplay (ok, I’m lying - that doesn’t exist anymore, it’s just a case of me convincing DH to shag me in the fertile period, pleasure optional and rare) breaking off to remember ‘that I need the stuff I bought on the internet’. Brief look of excitement on his face, picturing some sort of sex toy. Nope, pre seed. Whack it on please. Who says romance is dead?!

When the deed is done, 20 minute spells of lying naked on the bed with my feet in the air trying to force the swimmers in the right direction. DH watching and wondering where his previously sane wife who used to like a cuddle has disappeared to.

Thinking about upcoming events and musing to myself ‘oooh, I could be 20/16/12/8 weeks pregnant by then’. In reality I’m usually just on my period at ALL OF THEM instead.

Is 8dpo too early to test? Nope, I’ve been doing it since 5dpo. On every bfn that follows each day, genuinely convincing myself I’ve got a late implanter and I’ll be one of these people you read about who only gets a positive once they’re 5 months pregnant. Obviously.

Checking out a pregnancy test from about a hundred different angles and lights, taking 20 photos of said pregnancy test, inverting the colours, playing about with the filter and then resorting to staring at the thing like a magic eye puzzle circa 1995 willing a second line to JUST BLOODY APPEAR.

That brown discharge is definitely not my period, it’s a very late implantation bleed that happens to be exactly when my period is due. And the cramps? Early pregnancy symptoms obviously.

Everybody within a ten mile radius suddenly falling pregnant with oops / surprise babies - wtf?! My BF (who I love dearly) falling in the first month of trying, with twins. TWO BABIES FFS. And has now had the two babies while I’m still here, impatiently waiting for a bloody positive pregnancy test.

When my period eventually arrives yet again, getting so mad with the whole thing I throw my hands up in the air on cd1 (after sinking a bottle of wine) and announce ‘right, this is it, we’re not going to actively try anymore. There will be no ovulation sticks, no thermometers, no pre seed, no scheduled shags. We will RELAX and it might just happen without trying.’ Usually lasts till approx cd7 when I get even a hint of fertile cm and I’m gone.

The madness begins again.

aaaaaarghhhhhhhhh!

I feel a bit better getting that off my chest, anybody else feel the same?

Ps - I know I sound like a nutcase, I did used to be fairly normal...!

OP posts:
Miserablemouse · 18/04/2018 11:03

Hoping I've just cracked up laughing at my desk (laughing/crying with you, never at you).
I feel ya - on my period at my own wedding because I thought it would be a good idea to start TTC six months before. On my period over new year, when everybody else manages to get drunk and accidentally knocked up. On my period on husband's birthday and our "romantic" mini break. Next one due over my birthday. Life is a cruel joke!

Rant away. Glad you feel better for getting it off your chest. I think MN is a godsend for this stuff.

Hopingforthebestttc · 18/04/2018 11:26

Thanks miserable, it makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one in the same boat.

My very best one so far is coming up at the weekend - on my period at a baby shower! Ttc is truly the gift that keeps on giving isn't it?!

Hope it turns around for you soon!

OP posts:
17358anotherplanet · 18/04/2018 11:50

If you are not a writer, you should be. That made me laugh so much. It’s totally relatable! On a more serious note, fingers crossed for your BFP. Sounds like you deserve it. 🌸

Miserablemouse · 18/04/2018 12:51

You too Hoping. We'll both get there I'm sure, even if it means some extra help.

In the meantime I think it definitely helps me to laugh at the ridiculous things we do so rant/write away if it helps you! PS Ditto what anotherplanet said, it was really well written and funny.

Justwaitingforaline · 18/04/2018 13:50

19 months here and I am the woman you’re writing about. I could have bought a new car with amount I’ve spent on pregnancy tests. All of what you said is painfully accurate and has given me a right giggle at the supermarket - thank you for making me realise I’m not the only crazy TTC lady who does these things!

FWIW I stopped with the fertility lube because it gave me BV. If you think the lying on your back post sex is bad, there’s nothing unsexier than having to apply internal cream to your foof for 10 days Blush

Milly24 · 18/04/2018 13:53

Everything you have said completely relates to me i think ive turned insane too haha! Xx

DaisyMay25 · 18/04/2018 15:22

@Hopingforthebestttc you sound just like me! I'm glad I'm not the only crazy one who's life is consumed by ttc! I hate my job but won't get a new one because the maternity is alright... I'm the same with the weeks thing, I wanna go see my dad in Australia so won't plan that until the closer the time because I won't wanna fly too pregnant... I also do a due date test calculator each new cycle!

Help201602 · 18/04/2018 16:06

It’s so true! Made me laugh out loud as well! I’m only laughing because crying is not an option I want to start as it is truely a sad hard gruelling time, not words you would generally attach to the joy of conceiving a child!

Celebelly · 18/04/2018 16:32

This is my life too! So glad there are kindred spirits around!

Hopingforthebestttc · 18/04/2018 21:11

Thanks ladies. Posted that this morning in a fit of despair at yet another bfn, with AF about to arrive and brown discharge. Sigh.

I feel less alone knowing that I'm not the only one feeling like this, so thank you!

OP posts:
HoldTightPretendItsAPlan · 18/04/2018 21:28

Hopingforthebestttc you are definitely not alone, and TTC is truly shite.

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