"It looks like we may have to talk to you about IVF or ICSI"

[Mirry71]

Hello
After 18 mths of TTc and 7 months of waiting for an appointment DH and i finally got this letter from the fertility clinic today with this as the first line.
I feel absolutely winded.
What does this mean? All the initial tests came out normal. What are they going to do? How likely is it we will ever have a child. I was 34 when started TTC now 36.
Has anyone been in the same predicament? Please?

I was TTC for 18 moths and had this letter - went to the appt and found out at it I was pg with DS... 3 years later with IUI had DD after just 2 attempts == all is not lost.. keep the faith -- you are still young

thank you ZZ mum. Fingers crossed

please keep the faith stay postive I never EVER tjhought I would be where I am now - with the most perfect ds and dd tucked up in bed.. I weep over them often as I never thought it would happen.. but it can and does... at the clinic I et women who had tried a whole lot longer than me and got their families -- I pray you to do too.... 36 is still young,...

I guess...it feels like rock bottom at the moment (i think that is probably naive though...!) I am sure something can be done - I hope and pray - but am in bits about how long it will take, how we will find the money etc etc.
But yes as you say, keep the faith....

I can recommend the Fertility Friends website which has lots of information and others going through the same thing.

I was helped through some difficult times by the support and positive stories on the site.

www.fertilityfriends.co.uk

Wishing you the very best with everything, i thnk all the clinic wants to do is explore the options with you. Good luck, when is your appointment?

would say I loved that website -- they held my hand thru the rough times... please call me if you want to talk as I know how it feels to be facing IVF etc... but pld stay +ve.... it can be good news...

Mirry

I was in a similar situation and we were told the same thing. Really scary to be told that. We were recommended for the two year waiting list on the NHS. I was reluctant as I'd be 39 by then but completed the forms anyway. However I was very apprehensive and confused. Luckily I fell pregnant in the interim - just over three years after my miscarriage.

It can happen - I very much believe that a positive atitude can have an affect on every part of your life.

I very much understand what you're going through and want to let you know there's loads of support and experience out there. xx

thank you for all your kind words and will look up the website.
Feel very down at the moment but will try and think positive...yes at least something is happening...
my appointment isnt til July. Horrid woman laughed when I asked if there was anything sooner!

Mirry

It's understandable to feel that way - this is not what you were expecting to hear. Although I've got a child now I remember acutely how I felt. But again there are so many resources and people to help. You are still young.

Re - the appointment. If you feel pushed around by the medical system just remember that you're the customer and they are the hired help - don't take any nonsense!

Thank you. I think her manner is just unfortunate and it doesnt help that I am never at my least stressed when I ring up...!
What I guess I just don't understand is that they are talking about IVF straightaway when all the early tests came out as normal. Is that just because of my age?
All I've had done is the blood tests (I think on days 21 and 28 but that was back in December so cant even properly remember!) and DH's which were also fine. No scans no nothing...I feel really confused.

Call them up and ask for clarification - why they recommend this now and also which type of intervention. There is usually a nurse on hand who can talk to you. Don't wait till July for this information and also make an appointment with your GP to talk to them about this.

I think the more info the better.

Is it a private clinic?

No its the good ol NHS (which is why its taken this long to get this far....!)

Although if I had the money....in fact I did think about loans last night.

I will ring them up - thats a good idea. And I have a nice GP so i might go and see her too.