conception confusion

[evie1990]

Hello, I'm really confused and upset as to when I conceived.

I had sex with DH on 9th November 2017 we only did it once as he works away and he finished inside me (sorry for tmi)

I then had non consentual sex with another man on the 17th November 2017 I'm not sure if he finished or not as nothing leaked out afterwards (sorry again for tmi)

I am now 21 weeks along with a little girl, I did not want an abortion

The first day of my last period was either the 30th or 31st October 2017, I have endometriosis so my cycles range anywhere from 27-31 days

I noticed a brown spot of blood in my underware on the 20th November 2017 (could this of been implantation bleeding?)

I took a test on 3rd December 2017 which confirmed I was 2-3 weeks pregnant

I am praying she is my DHs but I know there is a chance she could be the other man's too and it's really upsetting me

The other man was a different race so I guess I'll just have to wait until she is born to see what colour she is.

@evie1990 OMG I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you're getting some help with this! I don't think there is any conclusive way to know until Baby is born I'm afraid. Have you spoken to your doctors or DH about this possibility?

Hi @evie1990 When you say non-consensual sex, do you mean you were raped?

I'm too scared to talk to anyone about it

@evie1990 you need to get some guidance so I would speak to your doctors. Have you been trying to deal with this alone all this time?

Yes, I wish I could do a dna test before baby is born but they cost £1000

Is your husband aware of what has happened and is he supporting you? If not, as hard as it is- you need to tell him. The stress of pregnancy, along with then having to explain what’s happened with a brand new baby if it is the other man’s, would be horrendously stressful for you. I’m sorry you’re going through this and hope you have had someone to talk to x

Have you thought about going to the police?

No way of knowing by dates.

@evie1990 I hope you’re okay. I’m so sorry you’re facing this situation. As a few people said on your other thread, there is no way to tell on the dates alone as it really could be either. If possible I really think you should consider talking to your husband about what happened

Please don't try and go through this on your own

It may be hard but if the baby is indeed the other man's and it becomes apparent at birth, your are going to be asked some very uncomfortable questions when you are at your most vulnerable. Not just that, but no one should have to carry that on their shoulders without some help and support. I'm so sorry you are in this situation

I was on the contraceptive implant for nine years. During this time I had not had regular periods at all!

My last menstrual period was on 20/08/17...
I then had my implant removed on 08/11/18 and had not had any periods since. I found out I was pregnant on 15/12/17 and my first scan was dated 7 weeks 4 days. According to my calculations I fell pregnant 2 days after implant removal.

Is this an accurate conception date being that I can not calculate from my last menstrual period?

All the gestational age calculations and having to add or subtract by two weeks is confusing me!

Thank you xxxx

Hi @evie1990 I'm so sorry to read that. You shouldn't have to go through this worry alone, you're a victim here. I would urge you to tell your partner and get some proper support, and go to the police to report the crime that has been committed against you xx