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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Better late than never??

15 replies

starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 16:18

Hi
I'm just new so apologies for what I inevitably get wrong :)
I'm 41 (42 in June) and my OH is 61 - though please think silver fox rather than old man ;)
We are thinking of TTC from around the start of May but I don't know if we're completely crazy. I have the copper coil so afaik fertility returns soon as it's taken out, so the plan is to get it removed around then and then see what happens. I've been lurking for a while reading positive and negative 40+ stories trying to help me decide if I should go for what is basically my last chance. OH has 2 grown-up daughters and a granddaughter so there will be LOTS to deal with in terms of reactions, and I know some people will think we're really selfish, but I'm also worried about being able to cope with such a change in lifestyle after 41 years of pleasing myself. Part of me thinks just let fate decide, part thinks I shouldn't gamble with a potential life, and part of me thinks I should grab any chance with both hands becasue we adore each other and I'd love us to be a family. So I'm here trying to get my head around the whole thing. Anyway, thoughts and advice all welcome x

OP posts:
DaisyMay25 · 30/03/2018 16:24

Hi Op, I hope no one says anything negative because there's nothing wrong with wanted to start a family, at any age!
If I was you I wouldn't wait until the beginning of May though I'd start straight away.
I'm glad you've found that special person you want to start a family with also I think there's a group on here people people 40+ that may be helpful for you. I wish you all the luck!

DaisyMay25 · 30/03/2018 16:25

I'd also like to add that Kris Jenner was 41 when she had Kylie!

Aprilmightmemynewname · 30/03/2018 16:26

I had ds at 43 although he wasn't my first dc. Good for you op.

Notproudofthisone · 30/03/2018 16:28

My mum turned 49 this year and has a 4&6 year old as well as 4 adult children. She’s fine, healthy happy pregnancies and babies! Don’t think the age matters that much, and your other half has other children so the baby won’t grow up with no siblings or anything. Good luck!!!

Original poster
starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 16:39

Hi! And thanks :)
DaisyMay25 we decided on May to give us at least a month on the pre-natal supplements and to get back to eating better and being more active. We were really fit and healthy last year then moved in with my Mum for a few months while we got some work done to the house and got into some bad habits Cake Gin
But also a month to swing between "Isn't X such a pretty name?I wonder who she'll look like?" and "WTF ARE WE THINKING??" Grin But yeah I know, time isn't exactly on my side...

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tygr · 30/03/2018 16:52

Good luck. I'm also 41 and hoping to conceive. It's not crazy or selfish!

ilikebread · 30/03/2018 17:11

I wouldn’t wait, get started now. I’m 33 and have been trying for 16 months (with an ectopic in between). I’m not saying this will happen to you but sometimes things take longer than expected. Good luck And keep us updated😊

Original poster
starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 17:17

tygr are you actively trying at the minute or getting ready to start? It feels so weird when I've spent the last 20+ years trying not to!! Good luck :)

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Original poster
starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 17:19

Sorry to hear that ilikebread. I don't think I was prepared for the amount of difficult pregnancies and mcs that I came across when I started browsing these kinds of boards. Its definitely true that people don't talk about them still and everyone has this image of how easy it all is. Well, I did, although I do know a couple of women who its happened to but now I wonder how many I just don't know about.

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ilikebread · 30/03/2018 17:26

starsandstuff I only posted because I just wish I had known how long potentially this could take me. I decided I wanted a baby at 30 then one at 33 then another at about 37. I’m almost 34 now with no babies and one Fallopian tube.

I’m sure you’ll be fine, many, many woman in there 40s are but it’s just good to bear in mind things might take a little longer xxx

littlemimosa · 30/03/2018 20:25

OP come and join us on the 40+ ttc thread. There are loads of us ttc and quite a few graduates recently too:)
We are all very friendly and would love to have you! Be warned though we take a TON of herbs and supplements;)

tygr · 30/03/2018 22:49

On a waiting list to have a uterine polyp removed. Frustratingly taking ages. I was single when I started and so planning to go ahead with donor sperm. Currently seeing someone a similar age to your OH but he's had a vasectomy. I might have to face the fact that this isn't meant to be for me....

clumsyduck · 30/03/2018 22:51

Nah go for it !!

Silver fox eh , lucky sod Wink

Original poster
starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 23:01

Good luck with that tygr. My OH had a reversal a couple of years ago to give us the option and it was successful so you never know...

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Original poster
starsandstuff · 30/03/2018 23:01
Wink
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