Desperate

[taylz12]

Hi,

I feel a bit silly here, but I feel like I am absolutely desperate for a baby.
I lost somebody very close to me a few years ago and I feel since that I've been more and more desperate to become a mum and to feel the unconditional love again. I've always been maternal and motherly and I really really would like one of my own. My partner is not keen on the idea of having children really and certainly not yet. I've been with him for 6 years now but he's just not ready. This gets me down a lot.

What do I do? I'm feeling like I'm going insane. I feel so pathetic and desperate.

Help :(

I feel your pain OP. I am blessed as I have a 9mo daughter after 3 years of TTC. But I would desperately love another child. My OH does too, but not yet. I think he thinks because we've now managed it once it will be easy. I dont. Does your husband know how important this is to you? Could you at least ask for a reasonable time frame to work with? I asked my OH if we could start trying again when our daughter is 1, he said he'd rather wait until she is 18 months. So at least I have a time frame to work with... that would be fairer of him I think! Hope you're ok x

Sorry partner not husband. You're living in sin like me

Thank you for your response.

I had an abortion while we were together and a miscarriage after a fling we had after us separating (before were back together now!). I had the abortion due to him being so against us having children. Understandably we were younger then but I feel like the whole feeling i have is a chase for those two unsuccessful pregnancies. I'm so desperate and I feel so silly.

How old are you?

I think you should definitely have a proper chat with him about this OP. If having children is very important to you & he is absolutely against it you might not be in a relationship that is going to suit your needs long term... you need to know if he doesn't want child at all, or if not right now.

I'm 23, however I'm set up in my own home. I have a stable full time job. He's said he does want children but not for a long while yet.

I love him dearly and wouldn't ever dream of ending things, this is what makes the situation a lot harder.

Well if you're very much settled & happy in your relationship then I'm afraid there isn't much more you can do OP. You can't force your partner to want/have a child now & you certainly shouldn't trick him into it. You're young, you have time. I still think you should speak to your OH & find out when he might like children. At least then you can enjoy the next 3,4 how ever many years knowing it's a future possibility...