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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Is it time to see the Dr? Feeling sad

30 replies

Merrz · 23/01/2018 09:04

AF due on Friday and pretty sure she's on her way! So that gives us 1 more chance before the 1 year ttc mark Sad
I can't believe we are here, i don't want to delay going to the Dr, obviously if there is something wrong the sooner we find out the better but i'm not sure i'm ready to accept that yet. Anyone else ttc for over 1 year? When did you make an appointment with your GP?

OP posts:
Cake20189 · 23/01/2018 09:12

I totally sympathise 💐 I’m going to make a GP appointment If I haven’t conceived by next month. It’s upsetting and scary, I never thought I would be in this position!

Cake20189 · 23/01/2018 09:13

Been TTC for 16 months , had an ectopic pregnacy about 11 months ago and I lost my left tube xxx

demirose87 · 23/01/2018 09:14

Hi try not to worry. I conceived my second and third child after 12 and 14 months and was convinced something was wrong as I conceived my first immediately. I then went on to conceive my fourth after the first month of trying. No idea why it took me so long with my second and third, though they were to another man so that could be why. But just because it's taken you a year doesn't always mean there's fertility problems. Sometimes it can be normal. But I would see your doctor and get advice from them and hopefully reassure you.

Miserablemouse · 23/01/2018 09:19

Similar here - one year in March since no contraception but only 7 cycles of "actively" trying. Not sure whether March counts as my year or whether to wait until August.

I think you're right in that the sooner you go the sooner any potential problems can be investigated or at least hopefully give you some reassurance, but it's definitely a scary (and unwanted) step.

No advice on when to see the GP but could you try and book the appointment for a day when you could go out with your partner or some friends afterwards for a nice meal and plenty of wine? Something to make that day not solely about the appointment?

FlowersWineCake to you. Good luck xx

Original poster
Merrz · 23/01/2018 09:44

Thanks for the replies.

Cake so sorry for your loss, me neither just imagined it would happen quickly.

We are the same Miserablemouse no contraception since beginning of March last year but actively trying since July ie watching dates, opks, temping etc. I'm counting from March though because if you google, primary infertility is classed as not falling pregnant after 1 year of having regular sex without contraception. It just seems like such a depressing milestone to be reaching Sad especially when so many of our family and friends seem to be falling pregnant at the drop of a hat! That's a lovely idea about doing something nice after the appointment.

Demirose that's interesting!

OP posts:
sazzle3 · 23/01/2018 10:24

On 28th Jan this year we will have been ttc #4 for a year 😔😔. My docs said to go in after trying for a year and they will do tests but I just want it to happen. Never thought it would be this hard after already having 3 xx

Miserablemouse · 23/01/2018 11:03

Merrz yeah it's pants, sorry to hear you're surrounded with pregnancies atm. Luckily nobody on my side of the family is likely to spring a baby bomb on me any time soon, but my best friend is 26 weeks with a 1st cycle honeymoon baby and I'm finding it hard not to be jealous. Fairly certain another friend is pregnant and husband's brother/SIL are TTC too so just waiting on the baby bombs there. Look after yourself.

Cake so sorry I missed your message before, must have cross posted. Sorry to hear about your loss, such a shit thing for you to go through. Good luck to you too Flowers xx

Gillster · 23/01/2018 11:17

Sorry to hear about those of you struggling to conceive particularly 1st time TTCers. Definitely go and see the doctor when you get to the year mark (6 months if you're over 35). The various tests that they do will take a few months so it's good to get the ball rolling ASAP. Make sure you tell the doctor you've been actively trying for a year as you're likely to be fobbed off. Sometimes it feels good to get the ball rolling on this as it feels you're at least trying your best. Hopefully you'll conceive anyway whilst you're waiting. Good luck! X

Twistedsister7 · 23/01/2018 13:07

I gave up bc in November 2016 and still no BFP here. I contemplated at Dr at 12 months ttc but decided against as it says the average person conceived within 12 months. Considering other minor health issues I have I decided to wait until 18 month mark in May. Now I'm not sure I can wait that long so maybe book if AF shows up this cycle. Currently in tww at 2dpo.

Pibbee · 23/01/2018 13:15

My advice would be to get it looked into as soon as you are eligible to on the nhs. I am about to go to first appt at fertility clinic (waaaah!) next week, and I had my first lot of tests in September 2017, so it has taken several months. It’s fairly nerve-wracking, but I hate being in limbo/not knowing stuff so if there are any problems, I’d rather just know so I can deal with them, rather than continue wasting cycles (if indeed there is something wrong which hopefully there isn’t...)

florafoxtrot · 23/01/2018 13:29

Just wanted to say that although its daunting and sad to go to the Doctors - it will also feel proactive and that you are doing something positive in your journey. The tests can take a few months as some of them require bloods at specific points in your cycle and getting a sperm analysis can be tricky too.

I am now 9 weeks pregnant after trying for 18 months so I understand your frustrations perfectly.

Good luck!

Original poster
Merrz · 23/01/2018 13:35

Congratulations Flora
It's a tough road isn't it but think I should book to go soon and then might feel better we are actually doing something.
Dh was diagnosed with a varicocele a couple of years ago and that's definitley playing at the back of my mind so I would really like him to have sperm analysis done.
Did everyone go to the Dr as a couple or did you make separate appointments?

OP posts:
Pibbee · 23/01/2018 14:06

I have been to all mine by myself. I went with DH for his initial GP appointment to get referred for a SA, but that’s it. I’ll be going by myself to the fertility clinic appt too.

Twistedsister7 · 23/01/2018 14:49

I'll be going to initial ones by myself but if Everything is ok on my tests I imagine DH will need handholding to say the right things 😂

BoRoni · 23/01/2018 16:07

Im on my way to the doctors appointment right now... 9 months without success...I feels sad and disheartened... But if there is anything I can do to conceive I wanna know and do it yesterday!!!

Original poster
Merrz · 23/01/2018 17:40

Thanks yes I think my DH would need a hand hold too lol but would be easier if we can go on our own.
I hope it went okay BoRoni? Yes I know what you mean, this has convinced me not to put off making an appointnent

OP posts:
BoRoni · 23/01/2018 20:16

... well I had the appointment.. Blood test next week and DH reffered to the fertility clinic .. I had the feeling that there isn't much we can do .. keep trying..

Original poster
Merrz · 23/01/2018 20:36

What is the blood test for? At least it's a start.

OP posts:
BoRoni · 23/01/2018 21:54

It needs to be taken on cycle day 21 to check it Im ovulating at all. They check for all hormones as well as thyroid hormones. I think I ovulate at least I have a fairly regular periods. However im on cd15 without any positive opk.

squiglyline · 24/01/2018 13:44

I’m now on cycle 15
I went to my dr start of month 12. He did a full blood count test on the first day of af then a progesterone test day 21.

Progesterone test was negative but got a BFP 2weeks later the mc the next day.

We’re still trying and getting negatives. 6 days until af is due and we can move forward from there.

I’d say just book your app now and get bloods taken, it’s best to know what your up against rather than years of trying to find out something could have been done earlier x

BoRoni · 24/01/2018 14:05

I agree but at the age of 39 I do not have too much hope. 10 years ago we got pregnant after trying only once.

To be honest my situation is a bit tricky. It is me who really want a sencond child and my husband is sort of ok to try ..(please don't judge me). He would be very very happy with another boy but not a girl. I talked to him about this and there is nothing that would change his feelings about this issue.
So we are only trying when to ovulation test is positive to sway for a boy as we did 10 years ago.. and that is why so important to catch the lh surge . I know it is silly but im happy that at least we can try even if it is one or two day in the month.

My husband is a good man and I feel lucky that at least we can try...

Chienrouge · 24/01/2018 14:08

DD1 was conceived in month 13. No known issues, just took a while. We hadn’t seen the Dr yet as we were living abroad and were waiting for our next scheduled trip back to the UK.
Just reassurance that sometimes it can just take a while!

Chienrouge · 24/01/2018 14:12

BoRoni you do realise that whenever you conceive, you still have a 50:50 chance of boy:girl? The shettles method had been proven to be based on completely false assumptions.
Which means if you do conceive, there’s a 50% chance of it being a girl regardless. How will your DH feel about that?

BoRoni · 24/01/2018 14:57

Thanks Chienrouge! Yes I do know and I guess he knows that it is 50-50%..but he believes in this method and at least he is willing to try this way.

If it is going to be a girl I have no idea what happens.. I hope he will come around the idea..

I feel powerless