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Conception

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Broody for Number 2

8 replies

Prembabymum · 19/01/2018 22:33

OK so here goes. I had my LO 9 months ago at 29 weeks gestation. He spent 8 weeks in hospital and required complex brain surgery, among other things. Needless to say it was an incredibly difficult and stressful time. He is doing really well now though and has almost caught up with his actual age (as in, although is only meant to be 6.5 months old he is behaving more like a 9 month old). There's also nothing to say that this would happen again as they don't actually know why it did but suspect an infection.

During my pregnancy I suffered terrible HG; being sick to the point of vomiting blood. I missed a lot of work and was pretty miserable. This, combined with a prem birth means pregnancy was very tough going. This part is likely to happen again and is daunting to say the least!

HOWEVER... now, every month during ovulation time I am overwhelmingly broody! I've always wanted two kids but it would probably be sensible to wait a bit longer before having another since I've just gone back to work etc. My hormones just overpower my rational mind each month though and my DH and I seem to be throwing caution to the wind more and more.

If I did get pregnant now it wouldn't be the end of the world. My DH and I are closer than ever and both devoted to our son. Our flat is too small and we would need to move but we can probably solve that before too long. Money is tight though and I've just started to feel like myself again; I've always been very fit and now I'm training for a marathon to raise money for the hospital my DS was in (which would obviously be put on hold if baby number 2 showed up!)

Has anyone else experienced this total, overwhelming, non-nonsensical, irrational desire to have another baby? What did you do? I may even be pregnant as I type so any success stories of other people who've given in to their hormones would be great too; especially if you had a difficult first pregnancy.

OP posts:
Prembabymum · 19/01/2018 22:37

I should also say that I'm 32 and don't want to add another risk factor into the prem/HG mix by waiting too long! Although having them too close together is risky too... it's a minefield!!

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MammieBear · 20/01/2018 12:50

Doctors recommended waiting at least two years between so your body has time to recover however it's entirely up to you both what you do, I'd say have a good talk together and make a plan as to when to try for baby 2.

MisstoMrs · 20/01/2018 12:54

No sensible advice but I hear you! We’ve had to wait as I needed surgery which I’ve only just had 18 months after DS was born 😡 I’m really keen to be pregnant with #2 when DS turns 2 despite the HG. DH is not so keen 😟 but then he did have PTSD after the birth. I really hope it works out for you whatever you decide Flowers

TheVanguardSix · 20/01/2018 13:01

It is such a normal response, the physical and emotional longing to have another baby almost as soon as you give birth to one!
It's a tough one. When is it ever the right time?
I normally would be like, "Wait." I think waiting is better for our bodies, from my own personal experience.
I am wondering if a part of you wants to 'get it right' the second time around, having gone through such a traumatic start to DC1's life. How wonderful that he is thriving and doing great. And that will totally continue! But I know from my own experience that some of my overwhelming urge was tied into a sense of wanting a happy, healthy pregnancy and baby at the end of it all, having experienced the trauma of delivering a stillborn baby.
Anyway, less analysis! I'd just go for it! It's always the right time and never the right time, if you know what I mean. And it sounds as if you and DH are emotionally in a great, strong place, which is more important than anything. You can always run a marathon.
MammieBear said it best: have a good talk together, you and DH. Take it from there. Best of luck!

DailyMaileatmyshit · 20/01/2018 16:31

misstomrs DS is 2 and I'm still waiting for my op Angry

OP, if it's biological urge rather than a 'heart' urge then I'd recommend going on the pill. Has worked me. I don't want another child but was getting broody. Being on the pill has stopped it.

Hippydippydoo · 20/01/2018 16:35

I felt the same as you would my dd was 4 months old....she's 11 months old now and I'm 30 weeks pregnant.

If you want another then crack on :) my sister and I are 13 months apart and it's lovely.

MisstoMrs · 20/01/2018 19:20

@dailymaileatmyshit that’s terrible! I know you’ll have done this but exert any pressure you can. My perinium now looks beautiful as my consultant is lovely but I have chunks of bleeding scar tissue inside my vagina where the Dr sewed up way too far. They’re really painful and, as they can’t be removed, I’m not sure what the point of the op was. I’m really starting to think about suing. This isn’t bad luck, this is negligence. I really hope you get your op soon Flowers

Prembabymum · 23/01/2018 09:15

Update; I'm not able to test until Sunday but I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant. Coffee tastes bad, nauseous, bad cramps, exhausted and constantly hungry. I had all these same symptoms last time too. I'm very mixed in how I feel about it at the moment; on a practical level it's not ideal as we are still very poor after mat leave, we won't be able to move for a while and it is riskier. But on the other hand I'll be very sad if I'm not pregnant in the end. I think I want it in my heart but my head is more reluctant. DH is delighted. Just want to know!! I need to wait to test properly (Although of course I've already done about 4 tests!)
Ill need to go to the docs sttaight away to get some anti nausea meds to help cope with the HG if it comes... It's an exciting/stressful/terrifying/lovely time!!
It's lovely hearing your stories; I'd love to hear more...

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