Almost 40 and giving it a go

[theunsure]

Hi all, completely new to all of this (babies, this site etc) so please bear with!
Just started TTC#1 and am 3 months off my 40th birthday.
Met my DH later in life, neither of us have children and hadn't thought we wanted any - but have had a late broody surge and we have decided to give it a try.
We've agreed to no fertility tests, no treatment etc if it doesn't work out, we are just going to see what happens. Can't decide if this is exciting or terrifying?!
I know the odds are not in our favour, but I have regular 27 day cycles and have been recording them on an app for some time as I came off the pill some years ago and we have just been ultra careful or used condoms since. But over the festive period we have DTD 3 times in my fertile window (as far as the app is concerned at least) so we will see.
I am half terrified it will work and then I have all the anxiety about abnormality and miscarriage. But also half terrified it won't work and how that might feel. I don't have this huge longing that a lot of women seem to have - it's more of a slight "itch"/desire to try. Scared to death of babies if the truth be told due to complete lack of experience. Never changed a nappy!
Ho hum
Have eaten and drunk all the wrong things over Christmas and New Year, but will now get on the vitamins and try to be better without making it a huge "thing".
Anyone else in a similar position? I did a quick browse and most people my age seem to have been trying for yonks and are definitely in the "absolutely certain they want a baby/very sad they are having problems" camp - whereas I see myself as "mildly curious to see if I'm up to it" camp!

I wish you the best of luck and hope you conceive.

As someone with health issues in my family, it makes me sad when I read of people wanting only perfectly healthy children, acquired health issues later in life and accidents can happen to anyone.

We had my 4th and his 1st when I was 44- accidentally! We'd actually had the 'no more babies' chat, when she turned up! She is a perfectly healthy 5 year old now, so just posting to give you hope.
Good luck with it all. It'll all be fine I'm sure.

Me too! Turned 39 in Oct, married end of 2016, so just started trying. All a bit overwhelming at the mo!

I think it's better to be more certain that you actually do really want to have a child before having unprotected sex at any age.

There’s a thread around about people having babies at 40 and there are a lot of them. I turned 40 a few months back only to have my partner suddenly want a baby recently so have done a lot of googling since. At 40 there is about a 55% chance of it happening. Reasonable odds.

If you’re serious about it get ubiquinol as that will help make sure your eggs are healthy (co-enzyme q10) and pre natal vits for conception as that will reduce the risks of you do get knocked up. ;)

Good luck. Oh and there is a 40 + and trying to conceive thread that’s good for support. I know there’s at least one other 39 yo on there :)

Do it now if you're interested. Odds still not too terrible at 40 whereas further into your 40s it seems a lot less hopeful. Personally I think it might be better if you're not devastated if it doesn't happen. Then you can see the positives however it turns out.

I second that. It happens later but the chances are plummeting at this age.

Please think a little more carefully about whether you want to do this. Pregnancy can be really tough going- you'll need the feeling of "itll all be worth it" to keep you going. The first year can be tough too. It's the ultimate in delayed gratification!

There are a lot of people out there who have difficult relationships with their parents because they were latelife curiosity babies, whose intrusion was resented.

That said, with a regular cycle the likelihood is you are ovulating regularly too and you should have a good chance.

I'm 40 in 3 months time and managed to get pregnant in first month of trying having only had sex once in my fertile window.

I do have a long history of recurrent miscarriage and various other issues so it is too early to say this will Work out but I'm definitely still fairly fertile despite my age. DP is younger but I don't know if that makes any difference.

Good luck.

Hi there

I'm 39 and 3 months and trying also. Got pregnant first go in July but it sadly ended in MMC end August. On cycle 4 of trying since MMC, not been pregnant again and now in 2WW.

The 40+ board is great. They've kindly let me on there eve though I'm just under.

Good luck!!!

Hi Coastal - where's the 40+ board? Sounds like just what I need too!

Hiya! It's on this conception thread called 40+ ttc, bring on the BFP's

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