Confused and down in the dumps

[Mrsw200]

Been a lurker for a long time but I came off the pill in May cycles pretty much became regular 33,35,43 but now on cd67. Spent a fortune on tests only to be disappointed every time. Imagining lines and symptoms but nothing! Feel crampy last couple days keep checking but no af. Just want to know either way. Sorry for the long post, I had forgotten about it for a couple weeks but now it's really starting to get to me! Ttc first baby so no idea what to expect, or how to feel. Is anyone in the same boat? Or anyone who had a bfp so late in a cycle?! Thank you and sorry about the rambling. Xxx

I can empathise.

It’s a lonely, emotional and scary rollercoaster coming off the pill and trying for a baby. I came off in Sept and my cycles have been weird shall we say. I try and stay focussed but I feel let down that I didn’t know how HARD it was to have a baby!!!! I literally thought come off pill have sex and boom! How very wrong I was.

Best thing I can say is you’re not alone, and if you ever feel the need to vent your feelings, there will always be someone on here willing to listen and whose been through the same as you

Such lovely words thank you. Definitely didn't think it would be as difficult as this, especially as friends and family seem to be getting pregnant on their first month. I'm 30 and partner is 33 so constantly being asked when is it going to happen I guess I just keep on waiting. Thank you for replying xx all the best to you as well, it's comforting to know it's not just me feeling this way xx

Helloooo. I hear you and feel you sister!! I'm 30 came off the pill a year ago tomorrow. Fairly regular periods since but just not as simple as sex and BOOM!! Our time will come. Meanwhile we are in the hands of our bodies. Eeekkk. Hope our time comes soon.

I know what you mean, it’s really frustrating when people say “it will be you two next having a little one”. I just smile and my head is saying “i f hope so!!!!” Ha ha. I’m really trying!!
You also have to remind yourself realistically what other people’s journeys have been like. Ive been thinking “she’s got pregnant quick and easy” but I don’t know for sure. I’m making an assumption. The only people I talk to about my struggles are on here, nobody else knows and I like to keep it that way

Let's hope 2018 will be our year. In the meantime life cannot stop I guess - at least I can have a few guilt free Proseccos tomorrow night! thank you both for being so kind. Wish I'd joined earlier rather than keeping these feelings to myself xx

That’s been my downfall, letting it consume my life but you can’t do that. It really doesn’t work and I know everyone says it “makes things worse”. I don’t think that’s necessarily true, but it will make you unhappy. It’s important to carry on living, enjoy having sex and it will happen. Happy New Year’s Eve Eve xx

I have just read this post after making my own post of actively TTC

Been off the injection for 18 months but only in the last few weeks we have decided to actively TTC.

Fingers crossed ladies xx

Fingers crossed to you and sending lots of positive thoughts your way. it's a really exciting journey especially the decision of ttc. Just finding the length of the journey hard and realising actually how badly I want this! Xx

Hi
I had odd cycles after coming off the pill. I went to the doctor and they did a blood test to make sure all my hormones were balanced and at the right levels. They were and my periods started about a week later so I'm not sure what would have happened if not but the doctor was helpful and at least it was a step in the right direction instead of waiting it out!

I think I'll definitely go to the doctors if nothing happens in the next week. After reading threads on here I did think they may just say wait and see and could just be cycles getting back to normal after coming off the pill. But it's been 7 months now so hopefully they will be proactive and do some
Tests xx

I think In a way I was hoping that over the last 12 months it would just happen, but as I say we haven't actively been trying, hoping now that we do it will happen

I just feel panicked that there is something wrong with me because it’s been a year. Honestly though, we haven’t tried religiously every month but I’m a bit like an ostrich and would like to avoid knowing if there are any issues at this time. Is that odd?? We have been married for 2 and a half years now. People give us that look or conversation starter all the time!!

I have to admit I'm getting down about it each cycle. I can't stress enough how much we really are trying. It's frustrating because there really is nothing else anyone can do when it comes to TTC. I wish it was as easy as one time.

That's spot on as to how i feel. We are not dtd every other day. Probably twice a week at most but still not being on contraception for 7months you'd think something would happen! After taking it religiously for 13 years due to worrying about pregnancy . From what I can remember my periods were regular before taking the pill so now I'm
Worrying a bit that taking the pill for 13 years has masked underlying problems. But like you I'm a bit like I'd rather not know, however I think it's getting to the stage that I need to admit something isn't quite right.

However must add dtd more when I think I'm ovulating however now I'm
Doubting myself as to whether I actually have been. Tried opk sticks but never really produced a strong positive so god knows now!!

I don’t know how to try harder! Haven’t used opks for a while so this month I’m going to use the clear blue dual hormone opk. Was really good when I used it before. My dh still thinks me stressing over it, really isn’t helping. Anybody making their other half also take vitamins??

I get exactly the same! Thinks me stressing about it how maybe made this cycle extra long. He's been good really though really wants it to which makes it harder when I know he's hiding his disappointment too and I get that he just doesn't understand the complete ins and outs of it! Haven't tried the vits yet - maybe worth a try though. I'll try anything I think now!! Xx

I take the seven seas ones. I have taken them for most of the year, although been a bit lazy in the last couple of months but am going to make a promise to myself to take them religious. I would love my DH to also take vitamins but he's a little bit against it! All to do with the trying too hard approach!!
I just feel like I can't discuss this with any one apart from on here. It's such a sensitive subject!

Sorry you're having such a difficult time. I was ttc for a year before conceiving my DS. I found ovulation sticks a waste of time, as were apps which tell you when your "fertile" days are. I also got so stressed by the whole thing I'd end up crying after dtd as it felt pointless (and I didn't enjoy it due to the stress). I finally said I was having a month off from ttc, dtd one last time based on cm and boom.
I took the same approach the second time (currently 7w pregnant) and got pregnant after 3 months of very limited trying (due to having a 6mth old baby).

I'd suggest see your GP re irregular cycles and try to relax and use cm as an indicator as to whether to dtd. Good luck!

Gizzy that's great advice and so reassuring to hear somebody say they conceived after a year. I completely get the feeling like DTD is something that needs to be done, rather than fun!

We'd literally just been referred to fertility clinic when we got our first BFP. Also I never got a strong positive on ovulation tests. I've found out my fertile day(s) are about 3 days after the fertility apps said they were (we only dtd once in the month we conceived for the current pregnancy which is how I know - hope that's not tmi 😳)

Wow!! All sounds pretty incredible.

Not incredible really. Just shows it can still happen even after a year. Just take the time to relax about ttc and get to know your own body's signs for ovulation.

Good luck to everyone who's ttc! 🤞🏻for you.

Thank you. I know I need to relax and realise that some things cannot be planned in life!