To those who haven’t been pregnant at all whilst ttc

[Bubblegum89]

Anyone else? I’m suffering with secondary infertility. My DD is 9 and from a previous relationship. My partner and I have been together for 5 years and would love a baby together but after a year of ttc, I haven’t managed to get pregnant at all. I just wondered if anyone else is in the same boat (or has been) and what it was that was “wrong”.

Just to say, obviously I am very fortunate to not have had to cope with any losses during my year of ttc. I just wonder if not falling pregnant at all indicates something very wrong (implantation issues, blocked tubes etc) and whether it can be resolved.

Took me 18 months to conceive DD2. It took the first month with my first. We had all the testing too. DH was fine and I was also fine.
I also had an HSG! I didn’t see my period after that procedure and my DD2 is currently snoring away plotting ways on how to drive mummy batty today.
Definitely don’t give up! Have the HSG and see what that says.
All the best OP.

I've been trying for a year with no pregnancies so far too. I'm going to the GP to talk about it next week. Really worried and really tired.

Ah I see. I had my tests done a little earlier than a year as I had an underlying issue (potential scar tissue which worsens the longer you leave it) hope you start getting some answers soon!

ISpeakJive that’s kind of reassuring, in a weird way lol I’ve been desperate for a HSG the moment I was told I could had scar tissue so it has been a long wait and I assume it will be a long wait ahead! How long did it take you from referral to HSG? I know you have to have an initial appointment first so that adds even more time on.

gonnabreak same as me then. It’s so tiring, totally after. I’ve decided to take a break whilst I’m waiting for my appointment with the fertility clinic. I’m so mentally and emotionally exhausted and I’m terrified that it’s going to be ongoing for years to come. I don’t know how I’ll cope. Best of luck at the drs :)

Bubble, it didn’t take long for my referral to come. It was all done within the month. I’m fact, I was really surprised how quick it did come. I was slightly petrified about getting it done but I’m so glad I did (I didn’t feel a thing). I’m so sure one of my tubes was a bit clogged up with scar tissue after my previous c-section.
All the best. You’ll be fine.

Thank you Bubble, I've registered with my new doctors this morning so I'm going to get an appointment asap. In the mean time I'm going to stop obsessing, just have sex as much as possible and focus on trying to lose some weight until the doctor can give me a diagnosis/advice.

Hello all.

I’m the same. 9 months now and no need to even test. I did test once even tho my period had just started - nuts I know - but I just wanted the chance to do a test!

Hormone and fertility tests all fine although they have been done in dribs and drabs and not all on right days.

DP ok but low morphology.

We have appointments at 2 IVF clinics in December. Am nervous but am 40 so can’t hang around. Am also waiting on my NHS referral but GP has been a bit crap about getting it in. Good luck everyone x

Really admiring you guys for not testing. I test constantly which is a source of anxiety. I test too early and then retest, in a loop of hope and disappointment. Let's see what they say on my appointment. Do they take any samples on the initial consultation? I'll be on my period so is it a bad time to go? Should I reschedule?

ISpeakJive hopefully I’m that lucky haha it’s been about 3 weeks since my doctor sent my referral so I think I’m looking at the new year now. So did you have a HSG?

Tris oh good luck with the new doctor! Hopefully you can start getting some answers soon :)

Janet lots of luck on your IVF referral, I love the NHS but they really aren’t exactly quick about anything are they?

gonnabreak if you’re just seeing your GP then they won’t do any tests there and then. You’ll need 21 day blood tests done first but they need doing at a specific time (21 days into your cycle funnily enough lol or 7 days after you ovulate if you don’t ov on day 14) but they will book you in. They will also ask your OH to book an appointment at the hospital to take a sperm sample in. They’ll need all those test results back before they refer you to a fertility clinic (if that is necessary) as most FC’s will not accept your referral if you haven’t had tests done previously. Try not to worry too much, it could turn out that it’s something really easy to manage with medication or something :) good luck!

Thank you @bubblegum89. It's hard not to stress out. Hopefully it'll all turn out okay for all of us.

Thanks @Bubblegum89

@gonnabreakmyrustycage it’s so hard not to worry isn’t it but there may be nothing wrong with any of us - some people just take more time. The test results can be reassuring but then also don’t necessarily explain everything. Mine are fine but I’m still not getting pregnant. Good luck with it anyway x

I'm on month six and haven't ever been pregnant.
I know I haven't been trying that long compared to others but already starting to lose hope and feel like there's something wrong.

Similar for me. We did actually get pregnant a couple of times in the beginning of TTC but had early miscarriages. I now haven't been pregnant in over a year. I have a 9yo from a previous relationship too.

In our case DH has a balanced translocation which is something they can look for with a blood test. We're due to have more specific testing on this in January so will see what they say.

FWIW at the start I did totally feel 'well at least I can get pregnant!' But that has gone away now too. Last MC was 15 months ago now I count it properly. I know I've been ovulating as been temping. Just miserable really.

Two of my closest friends took very long to get pregnant (over a year for both) and then both had two kids less than two years apart. Maybe something similar will happen to us.
I am getting a tattoo lasered and I'll have a session today. Even though my period is not due until Monday or Tuesday, I tested because I wouldn't have the session if I was pregnant. Another disappointment. It's all getting a bit too much as I feel it's been a year of obsessing over this and not really living. I haven't had a drink in a year, I haven't worked out properly in a year (I used to run, but I'm scared it will stop implantation)...

spongecake it sucks doesn’t it. I always used to get “oh it’s early days, it can take up to a year to get pregnant” but that doesn’t really help with the disappointment!

BertieBotts sorry to hear you had MC’s :(
I think sometimes it’s even more frustrating when you have been pregnant but then suddenly you can’t get pregnant anymore. Lots of luck with your tests!

gonnabreak I wouldn’t worry too much about doing things like that. Nothing you do can hinder implantation and in the first few weeks of pregnancy, the embryo doesn’t receive anything from you so if you’ve had a few drinks or whatever, it’s perfectly fine. Obviously once you find out your pregnant, that’s when you stop doing the stuff you’re not meant to do. When I got pregnant with my DD I had just started university and it was fresher’s week and I was out binge drinking every single night. Week later I found out I was pregnant but my DD is absolutely fine. I think ttc is bad enough without stopping doing things you enjoy “just in case” :)

Thank you @bubblegum89. Have a lovely weekend

Pibee I could have written your post myself. Stopped pill last December. Not a hint of anything. Going for bloods on Wednesday after going to see the GP.

How's everyone doing? I've got blood tests booked for next week. Had a very long luteal phase which gave me false hope so feeling a little down.

Oh that’s rubbish gonnabreak :( hate when that happens. I’m good thank you, got my first appointment at the fertility clinic on 19th Dec :) not ttc as such that month. Not doing opks or timing sex. I need a break! I do know that I’m on cd12 today and still getting non fertile cm so seems af is going to be late again. For the first 10 months of ttc (and the entire time I’ve had periods) I’ve had a 28 day cycle, ov’ing cd14. Last few months I’ve been all over the place and seems this month won’t be any different. Would love to know what’s going on. Been getting period cramps all week so was expecting to ov but seems I’m not anywhere near yet, usually get watery cm for a few days before and not getting it yet.

How are you doing? Glad you’ve got some blood tests, are they the 21 day progesterone tests?

Hi Ladies

Good to hear lots of tests are booked in. Hope you get either reassuring answers or things that can be easily fixed and lead straight to a BFP!!

We’ve got our first appointment at IVF clinic next Friday. We were meant to start with a monitoring cycle where they just take lots of info about your natural cycle. This has to start with tests on Cd 1,2 or 3 but they don’t test over a weekend. Annoyingly my cycle looks like it is shorter than usual this month which means my CD1 and 2 are over a weekend and I’m away for CD3 for work. The only work day I can’t cancel for IVF in the next 12 months!!! So we may have to skip a month. I will be keeping my legs crossed and doing all I can to delay that period by a day!

Good luck to all xx

Hi

Bubble, yes same boat here no hint of BFP 😢 DD is 2 in Feb. NTNP from her birth in Feb 2016, actively trying since beginning of the year. Gave up breastfeeding in March to speed things up as my cycles were irregular.

Tests show DH’s sperm is normal, I ovulate, fairly regular albeit short cycles (24-26 days roughly). Only thing anyone can point to is my AMH is still normal for my age but bit in low side. Fertility specialist have suggested it could be egg quality issue. Supposed to start ivf in jan but I’m terrified. My DH keeps asking what I want for Xmas and like you ladies, all I want is a BFP!

You are not alone, hope you get your BFP soon xx

@bubblegum89 I'm very confused about the blood test because the GP said they could be done any day? So not really sure what they will be looking at. I'm a biochemist so I wish he had explained it properly to me, it's not like I wouldn't follow his drift. He also said that I should start looking at IVF prices privately which I found odd, and no reference to any free cycles on the NHS? Dh is having his sperm tests in the new year.
I wish I had told him how depressed I am feeling about all of this. I don't have many people to talk to and it's all becoming a little too much for me!

My cycle was very different this month too so I was wondering if the cold weather or the hours of sunshine in winter could have had an effect on it? I hope your appointment on the 19th goes well and that you enjoy your well deserved break from the ttc madness. I will try my best to do the same, for my own sanity!

Yep 14 months and nothing. Went to the doctor recently as my bloods and DHs sperm tests have come back fine. Internal exam showed abnormalities with my cervix and my doctor thinks I have undiagnosed PCOS and has referred me to a gynecologist specialist and colposcopy team (cannot legally have a smear test due to age so have to be referred to department separately)

It's all incredibly frustrating.

In the same boat OP. I have a 5 year old and been actively trying for a year, but not been on birth control since he 18 months when we started thinking about a second. I think there’s a few factors against us, such as older DH and I’m still trying to shed excess weight for best chance. But DS wasn’t this hard!

I have all the symptoms of PCOS but had a scan and tests and apparently don’t have it. I did have folate anemia which is apparently gone now, so time to get some proper fertility tests!

Lots of luck at your appointment jane!

MissyPG oh that sucks, but I suppose it’s good that they kind of know what’s going on so know what to work from iykwim? Good luck!!

Could you maybe see a different GP gonnabreak? It sounds a little like your current one isn’t that clued up. The blood tests have to be done 7 days after you ovulate. Too early or too late and you can get negative results even if you are actually ovulating and if they think you’re not ov’ing they will start you on medication to try and help and you don’t want to be taking any unnecessary medication. It’s cd13 for me and still nowhere near ovulating so I’ve just given in trying to figure it all out now! If you ever need to chat, feel free to pm me :)

lunabear it’s so frustrating isn’t it? It’s good that you’re being referred to the right people. Hopefully that will get things started quickly and you’ll be able to get the treatment you need. Oh and the whole age/smear test thing is ridiculous!

dingdong it’s very frustrating when you’ve had one easily and then struggle massively to have another because you know your body can do it but now it just won’t and it drives me mad not knowing why! Have you been referred to a fertility clinic yet?

I had a call this morning off Liverpool Women’s hospital. They just needed my partner’s details and the lady was so lovely! She was only admin but I’m hoping that all the doctors etc are just as nice