is it really age or lifestyle thats my problem?

[user1483000828]

Hello

I'm a 38 year mum to a wonderful 2 year old. My husband and I had been TTC for 4 months now. I OV regularly and have 29-30 day cycles every month.

When they say the quality of eggs decline with age, does this mean that it's harder to fertilize, or you release less? If my cycle is regular doesn't that mean I should be OV'ing ok?

And how exactly does lifestyle affect this? I heard that alcohol and smoking can affect your OV'ing, but if i have a regular cycle then should I be worried. I know this all sounds a bit thick, but I'm so desperate. I don't smoke, but do enjoy a glass of wine and am slightly overweight.

I use OPKs and seem to get a solid smiley each time, so I think we're hitting it timing wise but it's clearly not working.

I kind of just want a bit of reassurance. I appreciate 4 months isn't long and when I read the length of time it takes some people I feel so bad for them. This is such a head f**k

:(

From what I understand, as women age the eggs they release are more likely to have abnormalities, so are less likely to create viable pregnancies.

You can also have anovulatory periods, where you haven't ovulated but your period still turns up regularly.

When you say you're ovulating are you temping? That's the only way to know for sure.

If you're in the UK you could go and see your GP after another couple of months as they see you sooner once you're over 36.

My understanding is women often release more eggs when they ovulate as they age, hence a higher chance of twins. However, the eggs are often not very good quality and have chromosome abnormalities. Remember that a large amount of miscarriages happen before the woman even finds out she is pregnant and most miscarriages are because of chromosome abnormalities.

Do you do your bbt as well as using opks as that will confirm whether you are really ovulating or whether you are just having an LH surge.

The odd glass of wine and a little overweight shouldn't be a concern. Lots of alcohol and being very overweight could be. As above, you can speak to your GP after six months of trying because of your age.

Good luck.

Also, what were you using for contraception until recently? If it was hormone based, could it be that your body is still adjusting? And do you rely on the opks for when you have sex?

Thanks guys

I don't do the temperature check. I will start to this month. My son has a digital ear thermometer, will this be ok or should I get a special type?

I do rely on the OPKs to hit the right time. I know this can be dangerous but I conceived well with my son on these.

I have a little more than the odd glass haha, but I am determined to stop, and lose weight. No point really wanting something and not be willing to do all I can for it. But I'll start tomorrow - today i feel af coming and I'm really down :(

Aw hun. At least AF means you can gear up for another month of trying! Do the temping as well. And yeah, maybe worth speaking to GP as it might be a wait before you can get referred anyway, so you may as well be on a waiting list while you're trying.

I relied on opks to get pregnant as well and it always worked for me.

To take your bbp it is supposed to be a particular one due to the fractions of a centigrade they go down to. You also need to make sure you take your temp before moving or doing anything in the morning.

I'm 38 and drinking didn't stop me conceiving although I was always a very light drinker, but my diet was/is terrible. I suspect that quite often it just comes down to the quality of your eggs and sperm as much as anything else.

Thanks so much Fuzzyowl, great to know your age wasn't a stumbling block. I read so many scary statistics, then another thing says those stats are outdated blah blah blah and don't know what to believe.

I can't help not use OPKs, I need to know when the time is right and can't just leave it to chance and relax as people say. I'd never relax, I'll always know when i'm OVing.

I've just ordered a basal body thermometer from amazon so will use this also.

Thank you all for your replies and advice, I can't start these conversations with friends and family as they'll keep on and on and it's just not helpful.

Fingers crossed and baby dust to everyone xx

I've been pregnant three times since the start of last year and all three are from having had sex once in the month and only when I had a positive opk. I've had one baby, one miscarriage and am 12 weeks pregnant now so I really do believe in opks working. Good luck to you.

Ahh thats amazing FuzzyOwl.

So sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I can't imagine what that must be like to experience. Congratulations on your current pregnancy, 2 babies under 2 - that will definitely keep you young :) x