Making me sad :(

[kleigh612]

So me and my partner found out we were expecting the other day
Over the moon!!! Wooo got my bfp

Anyway he's not really shown any excitement about it and then this morning one of the mums from school had messaged me about some baby stuff (could collect September) my partner made the remark of not bringing the pregnancy up untill were 12 weeks
He's been stressed the last few days with a new court case for access to he's daughter (not seen in 12 months)

I'm just a little disheartened he's not as excited or any where near as Iam
I just feel that the pregnancy has been put on the back burner because of the court case

I feel awful

I had to reply and I hope this helps. My partner was over the moon when I told him but he didn't get excited till after the 12 months. He didn't want to get his hopes up till he knew it was 'safe'. There might be an element of that with your partner too.
Good luck and congratulations.

Thanks for the reply
We've been actively trying for this bfp but even when I told him there didn't seem to be any element of surprise at all
When I asked he apologised said he was over the moon but it was just that it had come the week before his court case
Its driving me mad I can't even talk about it with him because it's not past 12 weeks feel like I'm on pins

Your dp may well feel a bit guilty that he will be a full time df to the new baby while he is still apart from his dd. Until court is all sorted he will likely feel pulled in 2.
Also he may feel worried (unfoundedly I am sure) that if things don't work out he will have 2 dc to try and be a part time df to.

(All info known from exh and his dc troubles)
Congratulations. . Am sure he will come good in the end - try not to see his attitude as a personal snub to you and the baby. .

That's exctaly how I see it right now
He's not seen his daughter in over a year and the court case has been a stress to both of us
But I thought the pregnancy would be some good news at last type of things and it's not :( I just feel if I bring it up before 12 weeks he'll show no interest
And what if at 12 weeks there's still no interest its just upset me because it's not at all how I expected him to react to the news

I think it just doesn't feel 'real' to some men in the very early stages. My DHs reaction to a positive pregnancy test (planned, wanted) was something like "ah, ok". He struggled to show anything resembling excitement until the 20 week scan, when the biggest risk was over (we had a previous miscarriage). I'd talk to your DH and tell him very explicitly (but nicely) that you would love to have some positive encouragement from him, because it's a huge deal for you, a time full of hopes and fears and hormonal stuff. I'm German, so tend to be very direct about my needs, but that seems to work fairly well for many men.