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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Tips to convince DH to DTD

21 replies

snowfee · 04/05/2017 18:01

What are everyone's tips for getting their partners in the mood to DTD at the right time? Without them thinking we just want their sperm?

OP posts:
donajimena · 04/05/2017 18:02

Hmm you want people to share this? You go first

Original poster
snowfee · 04/05/2017 18:03

My legs are shaved, retouched up my makeup, hair looks good, what next?

OP posts:
Original poster
snowfee · 04/05/2017 18:05

Yeah why not share? We all might get some tips.
The main thing I'm trying to get out of this thread is how to make my DH not feel like a sperm bank! Especially if he knows it's the right time of the month for baby making fun (as opposed to normal DTD fun)

OP posts:
MooPointCowsOpinion · 04/05/2017 18:06

Ha! Good one.

pinkyredrose · 04/05/2017 18:06

Show him you appreciate him and aren't just using his body for his sperm? Does he want a baby? If so then a simple 'I'm ovulating darling!' should work.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 04/05/2017 18:06

You need to keep the details quiet. .
Just let him think he is irresistible!!

JassyRadlett · 04/05/2017 18:07

Honestly? I've never TTC where DH wasn't as committed to it as I was. He didn't need any other motivation. He no more felt like a sperm bank than I felt like an egg donor.

Mothervulva · 04/05/2017 18:10

Get shit faced on gin cocktails. Worked twice for us.

Icloud54 · 04/05/2017 18:11

As a long term ttc'er. I think what works for us is not letting on when my fertile time is so he doesn't feel pressured. Also instead of dtd everyday we do it every other day around this time and other times too just so he doesn't feel used as a sperm bank.
Hope this helps

FlyWaxSleepRepeat · 04/05/2017 18:15

Just do whatever it is you do when it's not ovulation time. Confused

Fruitcocktail6 · 04/05/2017 18:16

I think he probably has to want a baby too, that's my trick

Notmyrealname85 · 04/05/2017 18:20

I mean... I usually feel more dtd when I'm ovulating, so just tell him you can't help it ... but say it dirtier :)

Pibbee · 04/05/2017 18:30

I know where you are coming from OP...My DP feels under a lot of pressure around that time, and sometimes cant finish etc. I think it's pretty common actually, having spoken to friends and read other posts on here. I think the approach of not letting on when it's ovulation time is a good one. My concern with that is that as me and DP usually only DTD every few days, we may miss the window (would be easier if throughout the month were DTD every other day, but we don't - which both of us are fine with), unless I start pouncing more in which case he will twig! Conundrum.Confused

Original poster
snowfee · 04/05/2017 18:35

@Pibbee you sound like us, we do DTD a couple times a week if that, normally weekends when we're not working and therefore not tired. Good to hear we're not alone!

OP posts:
Original poster
snowfee · 04/05/2017 18:36

I need to try and learn how not to let on. It's only our 4th month TTC so all still new to me (the trying at the right times, not the actual deed!!)

OP posts:
Batghee · 04/05/2017 18:37

I think just be genuinely in to having sex with him! Rather than just robotically going through the motions because its the right time.
Its the enthusiasm for the sex rather than for the sperm that will do it lol!!!

WyfOfBathe · 04/05/2017 18:46

I think you have to both want to have a baby, and both want to have sex.

It sounds a bit odd to me when you say "Without them thinking we just want their sperm?" - my DH wanted a baby just as much as I did, so he wanted my eggs as much as I wanted his sperm I can't find a less weird way to put it and also, I did want to sleep with him for many other reasons than him being able to give me sperm.

Pibbee · 04/05/2017 18:58

Thing is, for some people, when they feel under pressure for whatever reason, things don't necessarily all go as planned. DP not being able to finish DTD sometimes in no way indicates that he doesn't want a baby. He does.

@snowfee yes we are mostly weekend DTD-ers too! We both work long hours in the week and are rarely home before at least 8pm Monday - Friday, which does not help but not a lot either of us can do about it!

Sazwest · 04/05/2017 21:50

So I have just messaged my hubby about an hour ago ( I'm at work) and I said hi darling I love you just letting you know my fertile window starts tomorrow and I can fall pregnant anywhere from tomorrow up until 11th ( high chance on 10th then when app says I ovulate ) reply was ok darling let the baby making commence ( this will be our 4th) xx

outabout · 04/05/2017 21:59

What makes you think men can't observe 'cycles' and count?

MotherofBoy · 05/05/2017 05:49

Oh this was us yesterday!! Got my positive opk, tried to get dh to dtd and he tells me he didn't feel like it. Such disappointment. We had big argument where he told me he felt like a sperm bank didn't want to dtd on demand and I had to do more to make him want it (I was lying on him naked at this point) so any tips gratefully received! I have tried not telling him I'm ovulating but he realises cos he sees me go with opk to bathroom and telling him certainly hasn't worked as he feels under pressure. We only normally dtd once a week at most on weekends and I have v regular cycle and normally ov on a Thursday so it's not ideal! If we just did it when we felt like it we would always miss the fertile window. So I need to get creative, he wants s bsbynprobably even more than I do so it's not that but it happened so quickly for us with ds1 it is all new to us in terms of keeping the passion

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