Hi this is a bit of a complicated one here. So I'll explain what I can. I want to try for a baby by the time I'm 25 (I'm 24 in July this year) so I suggested to my hubby to try the end of this year. He doesn't want to. Now I can't work out why. I have pcos and have been having unprotected sex with him at all times and never conceived previously. Also I've had a child from a previous abusive relationship when I was 17 (father ended up in prison for raping me after I finally split from him) I couldn't cope and put my child into care which thankfully he ended up living with his paternal grandmother. Had a lot of anxiety related issues at the time. My hubby has 3 children from a previous relationship also when he was a lot younger and only sees one of them as the mother took 2 and his mother has the other. Anyway, when having conversations with him he almost seems to want a child but other times he tells me how I had a child with who I was meant to have one with and obviously me and hubby aren't meant to have a child as we aren't compatible or whatever! I don't know where this leaves me is he being resilient because of my pcos or does he genuinly not want a child with me. I'm so stuck and lost and starting to have to fight the depression coming back as, might seem sad I've always felt my purpose for being was to be a mummy. I am very good with children very good mummy. I went through a breakdown which is why I put my child in care. But I really want to be a mummy again. I really do. Time isn't on my side. Any advice welcome. Please no bitter judging.