TTC 1. Desperately seeking advice!

[DisneyDaughter]

DH & I are currently TTC our first, I'm 26 and DH 33. We're both very excited for this new adventure but also quite clueless as to what to expect. I've seen numerous close friends battle with fertility issues and it almost makes me scared to get my hopes up/too excited as I know it's not always plain sailing.

I'm slap-bang in the middle of my fertile window and the earliest I can test is Christmas Eve. This is only our first month of TTC and I suppose I'm just looking to hear from anyone who could offer any advice on what to expect over the coming months. How quickly did you fall pregnant and is there anything you believe helped the process along?

I'm just a huge bag of nerves and excitement at the moment. Could really do with hearing from people with a few words of wisdom... or even anyone currently in the same boat.

Thanks :)

Hi disney

I was also super nervous about TTC for my first. I like to research the hell out of everything and by the end of my research I felt like getting pregnant is so miraculous it's a wonder that anyone does it!

The thing that I have learned is that people are most likely to write online about problems with ttc than how easy it was. That is logical really but I did start convincing myself that I would also have difficulty having read so many heartbreaking stories about women struggling.

With me personally, I tended to note my time of the month in a period calendar so that I knew when to expect it for holidays etc. These records came in pretty handy.

I am 29 and dh is 31. We decided to try for our first after a year of being married so after Sept 2016. We first "tried" in October 2016, and by this I mean unprotected intercourse timed to ovulation. It took me 2 cycles to get preg and I am currently 5-6 weeks!

The moral of my story is, no two women are the same but try not to get too stressed by the doom and gloom you read online (like I almost did).

It's actually a really fun process and for your age it could take you up to 12 months but it could happen almost straight away.

It still hasn't sunk in for me!

Best of luck, I hope you enjoy the ttc journey as much as I do

Ps. Realised I didn't offer any advice. So my advice is, relax and don't get too drawn in to the details. Take some supplements if you aren't already (I started taking pregnacare and made DH take the male equivalent), and pinpoint ovulation. I don't like the idea of obsessively measuring temperatures and peeing on ovulation sticks. Having said that I did pinpoint my ov day by using the sticks in the middle few days of my cycle and made sure that I dtd a few days before, on the day, and a few days after (best to have a day off in between each day you dtd as I believe it increases the quality of the sperm). I hope this helps x

I agree with Heather you are so much more likely to here about problems than how easy some people found TTC.

I stopped taking birth control months before I intended to start TTC so I could get used to my body's rhythm.

Last month we both agreed it was time to start "trying" so I used ovulation tests just so I could be certain my fertile window was when my Ovia app was telling me.

It must have worked as I've just had by BFP on cycle 1. It's still early days but myself and DH gave each other a high five for making it look easy. I was so sure it would take so much longer.

My advise would be to stay relaxed, you will probably obsess but that's normal too. Just enjoy it and don't feel pressured. It will happen when the time is right, I'm sure.

Good Luck!

Make sure you're taking folic acid first up. You ideally need to be on that for 3 months before TTC.

Secondly you're probably going to convince yourself you are pregnant. And want to test super early. Please don't unless you actually miss a period. Relax. Enjoy and understand it might happen first cycle or 20 cycles in. It's not a race. It's a journey. X

I feel like you're going into this with a much better mindset than I did, so firstly, well done for that!

I assumed I'd get pregnant on the first cycle, partly as all my friends did (some even while on various forms of contraception!) and secondly because of all the info we got at my all-girls school ("only one instance of unprotected sex will ruin your life forever")... I get why they taught us that, but boy was I disappointed when I got AF on the first cycle!

I joined the TTC#1 thread (we're on Thread 5 now), and the ladies there are really supportive, kind and knowledgeable. The second time I got AF I was much more prepared and handled it better. This morning on cycle 3 I got a faint BFP and am still in shock!

I did test early (AF not due til Friday) and I know that doesn't work for loads of people and leaves them disappointed (in fact any professional will tell you to wait!) but the wait kills me and I'd rather get an early BFN and start preparing myself for the arrival of AF. It depends what your mindset is.

My only advice is to keep talking to your OH about how you're feeling, how you're doing... And understand that TTC is bloody hard and sometimes boring. The TWW is a nightmare and you are not alone thinking so. There might be days where you really don't want to DTD and for those days, buy some frilly knickers for your OH and some pre-seed lube for yourself(!)

Remember that 96% of people do conceive in the end and you'd have to be really unlucky to be one of the 4%.

Good luck!

Obviously the frilly knickers are for you to wear to seduce OH, not for him.... Unless he wants to. In which case I won't judge

Thank you so much, ladies.
This is exactly the kind of advice and support I was seeking. I'm so pleased to hear your success stories too. Huge congratulations to Heather , MissT and Kirsty .

I hope I follow suit as it would be such a lovely christmas present for DH & I. I'll be 14dpo on Christmas Eve, although I'm reluctant to test as DH & I are spending christmas apart this year and I think we'd both like to be there for the result, whether it be BFP or BFN.

Not entirely sure what excuse I'll give close friends and family as to why I'm not drinking over Christmas, either!
I'm loving hearing everyone's own personal account of their TTC journey.
Xx