So frustrated at NHS treatment. Advice much appreciated.

[IsthisMummy]

This post might be a bit lengthy. Please hang on in there...

Myself and DP went to Guys Hospital in October for initial fertility consultation. Our consultant ordered bloods for me and SA for DP. Normal standard stuff. I'd already had some bloods done through GP (FSH, LH and oestrogen) Unfortunately the GP had not been sent these blood results to hospital. Consultant asked me if I could get them from GP, and she would call me when the new bloods and SA results came back.

She called me a fortnight ago (but only after I chased her up) to say that my AMH results indicate low ovarian reserve and that DP has low motility. I was really upset by this news and totally forgot to tell her my FSH, LH and Oestrogen blood results which I had gotten from GP in the meantime. She didn't ask for them, so she had also clearly forgotten. She told me to go and get more bloods done on first day of my next period and she would call me after to discuss if any treatment would be available. I was so distressed during call that I just agreed and forgot to even ask which bloods they were.

I've just been for the bloods today and found out that it was only for FSH. The initial results of which I already have! I tried explaining this to nurse in ACU but she didn't seem interested. She just told me to wait for consultant to ring me back again.

I'm so frustrated by the whole process. Perhaps I am BU, but I feel like nobody there is even interested in helping me. Consultant is really cold and standoffish, and never even looked at DP when we actually saw her face to face. I'm also really concerned that she hasn't ordered any bloods for LH, oestrogen etc.

Not sure if I should try calling the hospital again and asking to speak to her? I just don't feel like anything is being explained to me. I've had nothing said about even possible treatment options and I've spent most of the last two weeks in tears. I'm seriously thinking of paying for a private consultation somewhere just to feel listened to! I did try and get my AMH levels off the nurse today for that very reason, but she couldn't get them off the system.

Any advice would be very gratefully received. Is this the standard level of care people get or am I just really unlucky?

You have my sympathies this happened to us for seven years. We finally booked a private appointment and finally got taken seriously. The consultant then wrote to our nhs dr about getting funding as we had been messed around enough.

Seven years? That is truly shocking. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It must have been unbearable.

At 37 I don't have even another seven months to wait really! Seriously think I'm going to book a private consultation here. I'm already going out of my mind with it all!

Unfortunately it's very common, not much consolation but if you can afford a private consultation I would (and did) you can keep the NHS running in the background if there is a chance you will get funding but it is a truly awful situation.

We can't remotely afford it tbh, but we're going to have to find the money somehow I think. It's just too stressful.

I can't believe how bad it is actually. I really didn't anticipate such shoddy treatment 😢

It's imo cruel too, go for the tests privately - they aren't overly expensive but stick on the NHS queue. At least you will have some answers even for yourself to help that feeling of sheer panic (in my case) that each month is another wasted.

It is cruel RuskBaby. That they can treat peoples lives in such a cavalier fashion is truly shocking.

I've already got my scan and 3 day blood results on paper. I need amh result from them (tried to get it today) I know I have low reserve, just don't know how low. Would I need anything else?

Did you end up going private in the end? I'm already looking at czeh republic. I just want to get things moving!

Just booked a private consultation at City Fertility next Friday. I just want to feel like someone cares and is listening to me!