Argh - pregnant and don't understand how

[ISeeIt]

... It's ok, I know how the birds and bees work. BUT I don't understand how I've fallen pregnant.

Back story: I have a 3 year old and an 11 month old. I'm still breastfeeding. My period returned for the first time since the birth of my second on August 17th. Nice and normal, and I got back to charting on kindara (to track my period).

Then nothing, no period in September and I just thought that, fair dos, I was just getting back in the swing and its normal to have irregular periods for a bit. But I peed on many an ovulation and pregnancy test stick that month to be sure. I've continued in that vein, and because hubs was feeling amorous this morning I did a quick ovulation stick since my cm isn't telling me much and I wanted to be doubly careful. Came back with super dark test line, which got me to wondering at the chances (especially due to lack of ewcm). So I did a pregnancy test and nearly fell over in shock when I got a BFP. WTF?! The reason for my shock is that I did ovulation sticks every day for the potential conceptions dates in question (clearblue digital says conception was 2-3 weeks ago). They all came back negative. But I didn't have any positive pregnancy tests at that time either (which was also the time just around the missing September period), so unless the clear blue is out by a couple of weeks does this just mean OVULATION TESTS SUCK and should all die? So bummed to have wasted the time and money (and mood) weeing on them!

There can also be no 'super sperm survival' explanation because i continued to do daily ovulation sticks after the potential babymaking occasions, for days after!

OPKS are obviously stupid. I don't understand though...were you trying to get pregnant? are you happy with your news?

I was trying to not get pregnant, really. I am happy, because it's a little life and that is wonderful, but I'm terrified. 3 under 5 and all that. It'll 3 under 4 actually. Crap.

More technically I'm wondering if the clear blue could be well off and me be more pregnant than it says? Why did that September period not come when I clearly ovulated at some bloody point, I just don't understand. Can anyone explain about ovulating when you don't have a period?

OPKs shouldn't be used to avoid pregnancy and be can't be relied upon. Apparently, you can get your l surge and it be all over in the space of a few hours so easy to miss if you only test once a day. Your pregnancy will be dated from your lmp I would imagine. Good luck with your pregnancy

I think you need to forget about the ovulation sticks for now, OP, as they feel like a red herring which you are tying yourself in knots over.

The fact is that your cycles had not returned to 'normal', so you wouldn't have had an accurate (or even approximate) idea about ovulation. You had unprotected sex, or contraception failed, at a time when you must have been fertile which the OV sticks did not pick up on. Who knows: maybe your LH surge wasn't high enough, you may have miscalculated ...

Are you certain that you are definitely pg? Have you talked to your DH about it? Do you have any support IRL?

Thank you Loki. Queen, I'm pretty sure - many brands of sticks, many toilet trips.. Many dark lines. My DH is surprised but supportive fortunately, I'm just tying myself in knots (as you say) because it's so unexpected. Where did that other period go then? (Half rhetorical, it's just having always been as regular as clockwork, even after AF returned after my first was born, I'm still reeling a bit). You're right about the OPKs of course, but I was using them to confirm what my cm charting was telling me (which didn't jnclude any whiff of fertility).

Thanks for responses ladies. I'm still not clear on how pregnant I am. Stupid I know but keep repeating 'how did this happen??' In my head. (Sex. Duh) :-/

If I pretend the missing period isn't missing, that would put my fertile window around when a couple of the dtd sessions happened. But I had no cm at all around then (made special note in kindara due to surprise at absence) and of course the OPKs said no (damn OPKs.. Completely accepting what you've said about missing the LH surge etc but STILL)

I don't think you have missed a period. As you're still breastfeeding, your cycle is irregular as it's newly returned. So, you had a period in August (possibly following a previous ovulation, possibly not) and then you started a new, yet v long cycle which included ovulation towards the end of September. And now you're pregnant. No missed period, just a long cycle.

Ovulation sticks can completely miss the LH surge. You can test in the morning and get a neg and then surge in the afternoon or vice versa.

I understand your shock btw. I was using condoms religiously. That man's unsheathed penis came nowhere near me. I was so, so strict about it. There were no accidents, no tears. And yet... I was pregnant. Imagine my fucking surprise.

YES! My other pregnancies I've felt a bit less baffled. I'm still just like WTF! I hope all turned out OK for you showofhands x

I used ovulation sticks, the day I supposedly ovulated showed nothing, but it must have as that egg is snoring in his bedroom

It could be off in the weeks indicator yes. It's all dependant on the levels of HCG. High level = further along (unless it's multiples or you're good and generating HCG).

Also, depending on your "window" you may not have used the OPK at the right time. They can show a surge and then nothing within a couple of hours, so if you were early or late taking it, you'd have got a negative.

OR you got a dud one, or peed on it wrong.

Either way, CONGRATS! Bit of a shock but still, congrats :)

Thank you thank you. Feeling wibbly this morning. And so it begins

Everything was fine in the end . DH has had a knot tied in the whole thing now and he's not allowed near me without armour on. Our family is DONE you hear me. DONE. Screw you sperm and your ninja crap.

Congratulations. I know it's a shock but you sound pragmatic and lovely and I think you'll be just fine. Tired but fine. If you have any ovulation sticks left, I suggest ritually burning them. It's quite cathartic.