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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

How soon can I conceive after my miscarriage?

75 replies

plummymummy · 24/11/2006 14:27

Ok this is going to expose my ignorance, but what is the earliest I can get pregnant once I miscarry? I am 7.5 weeks pregnant but almost certainly will miscarry (confirmed by EPU). I want to try again straight away. I know the advice is to have one normal period prior to conception but there is no evidence to suggest this makes any difference to pregnancy outcome. So after I miscarry, should I get an ovulation kit to give myself the best chance? Or will the test strips be unreliable because of the miscarriage. I was assuming once the HCG has returned to zero that I should start to get fertile days again, but maybe not.

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Original poster
plummymummy · 06/12/2006 21:29

Hello merrylissie - my dh is quite cut up about it. I think these things affect men more than we might think, but they cover it up well a lot of the time and go out boozing/watching football which makes it seem as if they're having a great time when they're not really. I'm looking forward to getting back to normal (in terms of closeness)but I don't feel the slightest inclination at the moment which I suppose is not surprising given the circumstances. Hello Mumpbump. How are you? Sorry seeing your friend and mum made you feel sad. It's hard isn't it. I echo your sentiment about fearing a 3rd m/c - when you say "not much there" what did you mean? Did you mean that the pg was not that developed? I am a bit torn about what to do to be honest, but I think I will wait and see if there's an opportunity ttc in January. If not, whenever! I'm 35 in January

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Mumpbump · 07/12/2006 12:50

Last time I m/c, the pg was quite developed so it was pretty gruesome - lots of blood and the placenta was the size of my palm (sorry if tmi). This time, there was very little bleeding and only a little (I assume developing) placenta. But I am just paranoid that there might be something left as I cancelled the scan they had booked for me... I guess the good thing about ttc in Jan is that at least you can relax and enjoy Christmas!!

Original poster
plummymummy · 07/12/2006 20:27

Mine was like that too. Not too much pain and not a lot of bleeding (as in volume) though it is now getting into the 3rd week. When they scanned it dated only about 4-5 weeks when it was actually 7 weeks.

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Original poster
plummymummy · 07/12/2006 20:28

Thinking of you tomorrow Merrylissie.

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merrylissiemas · 07/12/2006 22:04

thank you, i'm really scared.

Original poster
plummymummy · 09/12/2006 14:23

How did it go?

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merrylissiemas · 09/12/2006 14:50

it was v uncomfortable and i had some nasty abdo pains and backache afterwards. i just got up "assumed the position" and thought is there a doc in england who HASN'T seen my bits now tho i'm just going to have to wait. i'm obsessed with the idea that it's going to be bad news. been doing some reading today and it doesn't look promising. got bloods next fri, so should get results before that. spent the morning with my sil who is 20wks pg, her ds is only 12wks older than noah, so got a bit upset. i just feel like i've admitted defeat. how are you doing?

Original poster
plummymummy · 12/12/2006 00:07

Oh you poor love. I can understand your state of mind but please don't give up hope. It's so difficult when others seem to have effortless pregnancies isn't it (not that we wish difficult ones on them). I'm still bleeding thus still waiting to get back to normal (not that I'm ever normal lol!). Fed up wearing pads and fed up feeling dirty but not feeling too down. Possibly helped by a few boozy sessions with friends and colleagues (had our xmas do on friday). Thought to myself at least I can drink....so I did and in copious volume!!! People I bump into at work from time to time ask how I am (exchanging pleasantries - they don't know about the pg and m/c) so I reply "looking forward to 2007". They ask "Why? What's so special about 2007?" My reply: "It's gotta be better than this one"!!

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DimpledThighs · 12/12/2006 00:32

I am following this thread and wanted to say how well you are doing - a positive mindset really helps. I hope you are managing to relax a little and slow down.

Be nice to yourselves.

merrylissiemas · 12/12/2006 10:09

oh plummy, has the bleeding slowed down at all? it feels like it's never going to end doesn't it. on a new cycle of ttc now and dh seems a bit wary. i keep telling him that now is THAT time and while he seems keen in principle i think he's scared. thank you dimpled. af is due xmas eve so hopefully i'll get a bfp for xmas

MrsLoveToChat2U · 12/12/2006 10:39

Hi to all you girlies out there. Just thought i would tell you about some SERIOUS THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR WHEN YOUR TRYING TO CONCIEVE. BUT IT IS A LITTLE CLOSE TO THE KNUCKLE IN SOME PEOPLES BOOKS IN GRAPHIC DETAILS IS WHAT IM TRYING TO SEE BUT IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT CAN REALLY HELP YOU CONCIEVE READ ON....
Thankfully i am a mum of a little boy aged 3 new years eve and a little girl aged 20months.BUT BEFORE I HAD BOTH CHILDREN I HAD A MISSCARRIAGE AT 11 WEEKS!!
My misscarriage was an extreamly bad experience, not just mentally but phisically. The pain was so hard to describe. Im misscarried in February 03.
I had to have a dnc {scrape} and i was in alot of discomfort for about a week, however all i wanted to do was be pregnant again and immediatly!!!
The doctors said to me i should wait about 6 months give my body time to rest and start trying again. I told them i didnt want to wait that long when was the earliest i could start trying. they said ideally you shoule have 3 full periods then you can try.
HOwever after leaving the hospital i was devastated as you can all imagine when your desperate for a baby. So i read up on every book there was available searched every site available and took in as much knowledge about conception as i mentally could. I swear i must have a masters degree in conception without knowing it!!
SO. none of these books or sites told me anything new, until i spoke to a girlfriend of mine who had 2 boys and had them naturally but was struggling to concieve again, so after a year she went to harley street and saw a private consultant
about conception. He told her and hse then told me this........
its a bit gorey for some girls so i appologise but if you are anything like i was about wanting to know how to concieve you will listen to anything.!!
SO......... GETTING TO THE BOTTOM LINE. WHAT YOU NEED TO LOOK OUT FOR IS....
AT A CERTAIN TIME OF THE MONTH WHEN YOUR OVULATING AT YOUR HIGHEST LEVELS EVERY GIRL PRODUCES A WHITE CREAMY SOMETIMES JELLY LIKE DISCHARGE. MOST PEOPLE DONT NOTICE THIS UNLESS YOU LOOK FOR IT EVERY DAY.ITS USUALLY AT THE MIDDLE OF THE MONTH. WHEN YOU NOTICE IT, THAT IS A GREAT DAY TO HAVE LOTS OF CUDDLES AND KISSES AND FUN IN THE BEDROOM. But when you do have pillow underneath you to lift your body in the perfect position for concieving and if you can try not to go to the toilet straight after,lay still and relax with the pillow still underneath you for a little while. So forget times and dates of ovulation look out for this discharge substance you may get it over a period of a few days if so lucky you. This is your time. now for in depth gorey girl chat. When you get this discharge, you need to look at it to make things even more helpfull to you. if it is creamy thats abserloutly fine but if you find over the few days that is is more a a whiteish jelly discharge, then your very lucky as this is the ultimate height of ovulation. well this is what this fertility expert in harley street said anyway. So i told my friend after i misscarried how soon can we try and concieve and she said the consultant inharley street said, hospitals will normally tell you between 3-6 months, however as soon as you have misscarried your hormone levels are exteamly high so if you feel mentally ready and have been given the clear from your gp then after having one period you are fine to try straight away. I misscaried in feb 03, had what i would call a Spotting period for 2 days normally im 5 days on, and march 03 i concieved my son and had him on new years eve 03. 6 girls i have told about his has since looked out for this and concieved each time, im not saying it wil work that very month or do i mean it will be the awnser for the whole womens population by no means but its something to look out for and try as the next time my hubby and i decided to try again. that exact method by looking out for the discharge got me pregnant the very next month and i had a little girl.
So good luck to all you girls out there, try to relax your mind as much as possible to take some of the preasure off you and your partner and your time will hopefully come.xxx
with lots of love
XX

merrylissiemas · 12/12/2006 10:57

thank you mrs will def look out for that. my temp is v low at the mo, but i've noticed the discharge before and always thought it was the wrong time

MrsLoveToChat2U · 12/12/2006 11:01

Hi honey, great to know you know its there though!!!
Happy love making.and merry crimbo.xx

merrylissiemas · 12/12/2006 11:40

and you

merrylissiemas · 13/12/2006 15:30

swabs all clear!!!! no infection, no PID, merry xmas all!!!!

Original poster
plummymummy · 13/12/2006 21:12

Fantastic news Merrylissie. So pleased for you. Get dh a bit tipsy so he forgets the pressure to perform. I do feel sorry for them at times That is brilliant news before xmas as it means you can really get on with your life and not feel those nagging doubts. Thanks for your support dimpled thighs and thanks for your advice Mrslovetochat. I have started drinking grapefruit juice which is supposed to improve the quality of the c/m. Don't feel embarrassed about the detail - not much shocks me! V pleased your pgs after m/c went well also. Well the bleeding has actually got heavier (since the only night of closeness with dh) so maybe that's good as it might help it out, or maybe it's not. Either way I could cheerfully throw a load of sanitary towels on a bonfire and dance around it. I so hate the damn things. I feel so dirty when I wear them. I want to start jogging again but there's no hope when wearing those things. Love to all xx

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merrylissiemas · 13/12/2006 21:15

plummy, its all in hand so to speak have you decided what to do re ttc?

Original poster
plummymummy · 13/12/2006 21:32

Glad to hear it . Re. ttc, I'm going to go for it as soon as I ovulate. Haven't a clue when that will be as I usually get my period in the first week of the month, but I'm still bleeding from the m/c so it's all up in the air. It would be nice if we conceive around the same time (even if there's a couple of months in it).Good luck with it all xx

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merrylissiemas · 13/12/2006 21:40

try this hope it all goes well x

merrylissiemas · 15/12/2006 13:45

well, had bloods 8 effing pots!!!!! i asked the nurse if she was sending them to the lab or bloody transylvania. wish me luck

merrylissiemas · 18/12/2006 16:24

bloods came back normal, sooo relieved af is due xmas eve so fingers crossed. how are you all?

Mumpbump · 19/12/2006 12:15

Hi merrylissiemas! Glad to hear that the bloods were okay. Have they given you any other explanation for why you m/c or is it just "one of those things"?

Saw you posted on the ttc after m/c thread. Am vaguely hoping that I might be pg so will test at the start of January so will test if my af doesn't arrive...

merrylissiemas · 19/12/2006 19:49

no, not yet. got to see gp on 27th to decide next course of action. when is af due?

Mumpbump · 20/12/2006 09:48

If my cycle goes back to how it was before pg and afterwards, it should be around 4 Jan. Keep hoping that I am pg, but trying to persuade myself that I'm probably not so I don't get disappointed. I was never that fussed before, but having the m/c seems to have raised the stakes a bit...

merrylissiemas · 20/12/2006 10:42

ikwym. just before the 1st mc i was upset that i was pg again, ds was 6mo but mcing totally threw me. felt like such a failure, my defective body etc. fingers crossed for you sweet

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