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AF 11 Days Overdue - Feeling Like Such an Idiot

13 replies

xoMysteryFriendxo · 10/04/2015 12:09

Hey everyone

Last time I posted, it was in the 'pregnancy' bit on this forum, but looking back I think my post is more suited to this thread! I can't tell you all how grateful I am to have somewhere to share my thoughts with others (who hopefully) understand.

My AF is as regular as clockwork (every 27 days), so when I recently missed it I thought there was a high chance I could be pregnant. I'm now 11 days late and 4 BFN's later (2 from Waitrose & 2 from the chemist) I'm thinking maybe not? I bet loads of you are going through this or have been through it before, but when you're trying to get pregnant it's the most frustrating thing ever!

I don't want to talk to anyone about this (except my fiancé), but it's made things hard. For example I've just taken up running with a friend who is pushing me hard, but if I was pregnant I'm sure I'm not meant to take up running, especially in the 1st trimester. What on earth do I do? It seems absolutely crazy to stop doing it 'just incase'. But then if I did suddenly get a BFP I would feel terribly guilty and worried for the baby. It's the same with eating - do you eat like you're pregnant 'just incase', or is that just being ridiculous? I honestly feel like such an idiot, because I swore I would never get like this over trying to get pregnant. I had a 'if it happens, it happens attitude'. Mainly because I've seen friends become totally destroyed when they can't get pregnant, and I didn't want to become that way. (One in particular fell out with everyone over it because she became so jealous of their babies - poor girl).

Before it even occurred to me that I could be pregnant I had a bit of a faintly episode (feeling queasy etc), but really didn't think anything of it. Then at work, about a week later, I felt queasy again. I only remember these episodes because they were at specific, memorable times. Right when I didn't need it! My boobs were unusually sore for at least 3 weeks, but over the past two days this has nearly disappeared. The one thing that I still have is these crazy AF type cramps. Some really take my breath away, and I get them everyday! Again - I would normally take pain killers and get on with it, but what if I am pregnant? I feel like I'm suffering in silence here.

I've had loads of other strange feelings too. Before I suspected, there was a weird twinge episode, like a pulsing in my tummy. I've never had anything like that before! I felt ridiculously hot all over, when normally I'm freezing cold all the time. I still feel hot, but not as hot as I did. Then last week sometime it felt like my insides were falling out at one point.

It's all a bit odd really. I'm totally emotional, and there's been a bit of crying! As, I said previously - I really do feel like an idiot! Yesterday, when I took test number 3, I didn't read the instructions (thinking it was the same as the Waitrose ones), and I got mega excited when I saw two lines. Then I read the pack, and realised a cross means a BFP. I felt gutted. (But it's funny in a way!).

I've kinda had to have a word with myself today, and have decided that I'm just going to behave normally from now on. Like I'm not pregnant (because I'm probably not). So I'll eat what I want, go running, and even to the spa day I have planned (apparently if you're pregnant you can't go in the jacuzzi, you can't get a massage etc etc). I'm not going to take another test unless I missed a 2nd period.

I guess I just wanted to share these final thoughts, and check if you guys think I'm doing the right thing? Or should I be careful just incase? What approach do you all take in this situation? Sorry for this essay type post, but I feel a hell of a lot better after writing it!!!! Smile

One last thing - I was pregnant about 10 years ago and the tests didn't show positive until 8 weeks, so although I feel like I'm being a bit ridiculous right now, it's not totally unfounded......

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zippyswife · 10/04/2015 12:14

I was in the same situation as you last month. Very frustrating! AF came 11 days late. I don't know why but sometimes it just happens. I also had pregnancy symptoms.

However given with your pregnancy 10 years ago not showing until 8 weeks I'd probably carry on as normal but go to gp and get bloods done just to confirm either way.

Good luck.

xoMysteryFriendxo · 10/04/2015 12:33

That's a shame for you zippyswife. I'm expecting the exact same thing to happen to me. I've given up! I read somewhere that the docs won't test unless you've missed two periods? I don't want to bother them unless I really have to. Even though I would love peace of mind! Thanks for your reply. Good luck to you too.

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zippyswife · 10/04/2015 13:08

Yes. I was clinging to hope and clutching at straws- it was so disappointing.

I don't want to get your hopes up but as this has happened before to you maybe go to the gp and explain? Say you're training had etc as have had BFN but are aware this could harm a pregnancy. Let me know how it goes. Good luck.

xoMysteryFriendxo · 14/04/2015 07:48

A quick update. I spoke to a friend who's a nurse, and we agreed I should wait another week, then take a test again. If it was still a BFN then I would go and see the doctor. However, about 4 days ago I discovered the tiniest amount of blood in my urine. It was so faint you could hardly see it, and only on the tissue paper. (Sorry tmi). I wasn't worried, even though I thought it was a little odd. Anyway yesterday I started bleeding just like I got my AF. So I now think I'm def not pregnant. But here's the thing - something strange has come out of me - twice now. The first time it was like white tissue, and the second time it was 4 times the size, and like the same white tissue, but with grey bits, loads of blood clots and red veins. I'm so so sorry for being so graphic, but I've never seen anything like it! Has anyone else had anything like this before? Should I be worried?

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zippyswife · 14/04/2015 17:39

Hmm sorry I can't help. Maybe a visit to the gp (although I'd be amazed if they shed much light on it).

Good luck x

zippyswife · 14/04/2015 17:40
  • I wouldn't be worried but go to the gp if you're concerned it might ease your worries. Ttc is stressful enough. X
CarbonFibrePrincess · 14/04/2015 19:38

This was me last month. AF showed right on time this month ?? the whole thing was stressful and disappointing.

MishMooshAndMogwai · 14/04/2015 19:48

I've had something similar in the past, some say it's a miscarriage and some say it's womb lining that hasn't broken down. I've not got to the bottom of it to be honest, sorry I can't be more helpful!

Saying that, there was a stark contrast to my mmc which was very painful, lots of blood and a need to push. I don't know if it's the same for everyone, I doubt it is but when it was definitely a miscarriage it was very noticeable!

xoMysteryFriendxo · 14/04/2015 22:06

I'm with you on this one zippyswife. I'm sure I'll just be wasting their time, as like you say, it's doubtful they will shed any light.

Like yourself MishMooshAndMogwai - I don't think I'll ever get to the bottom of it. But thanks for your reply because I found it useful.

And CarbonFibrePrincess - I really feel for you. This has been an awful couple of weeks. So stressful. All that pain, and what for? Shock

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xoMysteryFriendxo · 15/04/2015 23:09

A quick update - I went to the doctors today, who confirmed this was a miscarriage. Very sad, but I guess it wasn't the right time for us. Thanks again for all your replies.

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zippyswife · 15/04/2015 23:11

Oh sorry to hear to hear that OP. Flowers xx

MishMooshAndMogwai · 16/04/2015 22:11

Sorry to hear that, good luck for future cycles xx

xoMysteryFriendxo · 17/04/2015 19:49

Thank you. It's a shame, but so common in early pregnancy. I never want to go through anything like this again, but realise it could be far worse. Onwards and upwards I guess..... Xxx

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