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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

Obsessed with age gaps!

16 replies

JoeTwoTies · 13/10/2006 23:42

I have a 16 month gap between first two kiddiwinks and would love to have a third. Anyone any views on benefits of big / small / same age gap? Cheers!

OP posts:

NastyNemo666 · 13/10/2006 23:54

I have a 2.2yr gap between ds and dd and it was fab gap. I will have just under 13mths between DD and DB so will let you know on the small one.

mozhe · 14/10/2006 00:35

I have 18 months between DS1 and DS2,then 12 months between him and DS3 and then 2.5 years with DDsx2 aged now 5 months. It means they are all growing up together.I hope to start trying for no6 this year and then call it a day...i think.

Original poster

JoeTwoTies · 15/10/2006 14:04

Mozhe - that is very impressive. Well done you! That is very inspiring!
Nemo - that sounds lovely and they will all grow up together. Think small gap is good!

OP posts:

RottenOtter · 15/10/2006 14:30

yes i may go for small age gap next time. The only age gap i dont recommend is 3 years. Too long as baby and old enough to realise they have been ousted!

curlew · 15/10/2006 14:41

I come from a family of three children with eight years between each of us! It's a bit like a family with three only children - we certainly all feel as if we were brought up by different parents - my elder brother's mother was 24 and mine was 40!

My children are 5 and 10 and so far it's a brilliant gap - dd was old enough to be properly involved and bribable when ds came along, ds has another older person to fight his corner and dd has an adoring acolyte. I suspect that 15 and 10 will be a different matter!

EmmyLou · 15/10/2006 15:02

There are 3 and a half years between DD1 nd DD2 and 4 and a half years between DD2 and DD3.

I thought these were great age gaps when the youngest at the time was a baby - there was little or no jealousy and they enjoyed helping out and generally having a baby around.

BUT it is more difficult now as trying to find something they can all do together is nigh on impossible and I feel DD1 (11) doesn't get to do what she wants as much as I would like bcause DD3 (3) is too young to trail round the shops for clothes/go to the cinema etc etc.

It might not be such a problem if DH didn't work abroad for long periods and was around more when he was in the UK - the age gap thing can depend on so many different family dynamics. Reckon there are pros and cons to both big and small age gaps.

Original poster

JoeTwoTies · 17/10/2006 19:49

Really great to get everyone's thoughts, and so cheers muchily for giving me something to think about. You kind of forget when they are little that they do get bigger!!!! x

OP posts:

Bodkin · 17/10/2006 23:02

Two words - "double buggy" just couldn't face it, so have opted for large (but, sadly, growing larger) age gap

ScotGirlInOz · 19/10/2006 06:23

Hi JoeTwoTies

I only have one DD at the moment but I am obsessed with age gaps too. I wanted another one when DD was 3yrs but she is 2 and a 1/2yrs now so that isn't going to happen. My DP wanted 5 yrs between them but I said No Way - too long - for me personally that is. So we have agreed (sort of ) with ttc next January and hopefully being due the following Janurary. DD will be 4 in the April of that year. Then for our third! DP just doesn't know this yet - I would like 28 months between them. That way my oldest DD would just have turned 6. Sorry to ramble on.

jasnDISMemBERED · 19/10/2006 06:36

I have 15 months between dd1 & 2, and 5.5 years between dd2 and ds. Ds is only 8 months, but so far both have lots of positives, in different ways.

curlew · 19/10/2006 07:06

I think the best age gaps are either very short - so that the first one doesn't really remember being an only and they grow up together, or big so that the first one can be really part of it, and can also understand that babies are demanding and mummy really will help with barbie's tea party/action man's recreation of the Tet offensive as soon as the baby's had breakfast/lunch/dinner/morning coffee/afternoon tea/between meal snack.

sugarfLeewhileyoustillcan · 19/10/2006 08:11

I didn't do any planning at all with mine and have gaps of 5.10 and exactly 4 years.
I think you just get on with what you've got because you don't know any different.

At the moment I've got one in Secondary,one in Primary and one at pre-school.Keeps me on my toes.

SoupDragon · 19/10/2006 08:19

Which ever gap you get is both wrong and right for different reasons I wanted and got a 2 year gap between DS1 & 2 but then wanted No 3 3 years after DS2. She arrived 5 years after him. Which, as I said, is both good and bad

Original poster

JoeTwoTies · 19/10/2006 22:20

Bodkin you have a point!!
Curlew - love what you wrote....does that time ever come though!???

OP posts:

DomesticDuddess · 19/10/2006 22:29

No such thing as the perfect age gap!

curlew · 19/10/2006 22:35

JoeTwoTies - so far a 5 year age gap has been brilliant in this family - currently 10 and 5. I suspect teenage years might be a bit tricky, but I'm pollyannaishly hoping that the last few years had built up a good relationship between them that will weather a few storms when she's 15 and he's 10!

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