My body's an arsehole and I'm impatient

[ImpatiencePersonified]

Not a winning combination....

Last period - 26th of July
Fertile days - According to the ClearBlue thingy - 18th - 22nd August
Cycle day - 41 and counting

Symptoms imagined or real, who knows...
1 - No AF - my cycles have been irregular since I came off the pill in Jan, and have ranged from 33-41 days
2 - Not sore, but tender boobs... and the feel kind of odd, like someones pumping up a balloon from the inside
3 - Stretchy feelings in the baby cave
4 - You know that feeling when you expect to wipe and see blood just before your period? That... but only yesterday and no blood then it buggered off
5 - Bloating and water retention... had me a cracking hillbilly sock line yesterday and everything feels tight.
6 - This is linked to 5 really but for the first time in 12 weeks no loss at Slimming World. I am meticulous with my food... I always lose at period time even. Only lost 2 stone so far so its not a panic button from my body (have prob another 5 stone to lose!)
7 - I FEEL FRIGGING PREGNANT... at least I think I do, I have no idea what it feels like

Unfortunately Clear Blue and I don't agree, the CBB (Clear Blue Bastard) says I aint pregnant. A test on Monday, yesterday and today say BFN (and laugh at me).

Going to try a different brand tomorrow, I know its still early but we travel to see the outlaws 300 miles away this weekend and it would be HA-Mazin to be able to tell them in person. If there is a bub in there it will soon have to understand that mamma is impatient.

I would now be visiting the GP and requesting you have blood tests done to see what your hormone levels are like. You need a day 2 test done to begin with to check and compare your LH level against that of your FSH level. LH and FSH are two very important hormones that kickstart the ovulation process; if these levels are awry then ovulation is affected.

A "normal" cycle length is a length of between 21 and 35 days OR with less than 4 days of variation from month to month. Your cycles would be seen as irregular. It sounds like your body is trying and failing to ovulate and it is possible to have periods without actually ovulating.

Irregular periods are often caused by hormonal imbalances; in this respect a condition called polycystic ovaries or its related syndrome PCOS are common culprits. You should also be assessed to see if there are any issues with your thyroid gland.

OPKs are also next to useless when it comes to irregular cycles as well and these should really be avoided.

Seek medical advice and would advise you also to stop pg testing if the previous one has shown a negative result - seeing repeated negatives can be and is very disheartening.

Yeah I have been in touch with the GP - a lovely 3 week wait ahead of me unless my head is falling off!

I'm not giving up hope though - as odd as it sounds, I don't FEEL like there's anything amiss in terms of my health. Previous pill was Cerazette and from reading up on the dreaded tinterwebs its quite common for some irregularity afterwards.

I can but hope! (and yes there's a very high chance I'm in complete denial)

Ohh also, should add, I was tested for PCOS And PO about 10 years back (not because I was trying to conceive mind) and given the all clear... thyroid has also been tested in the past.

Hopefully both of those remain static?

TBH I would be registering with another practice if you have to anyway wait a number of weeks to see a GP.

I hope you are not in denial but there is always a cause for irregularity of periods and it is certainly in your interests to find out why this is happening. Both PCO and PCOS do not go away of their own accord, nor for that matter do thyroid problems.

The pill often masks symptoms of any underlying hormonal imbalance if that is there. Also the pill leaves your system very quickly after taking the last tablet.

You need up to date test results, evaluations done a decade ago are no longer relevant.

I preempted your advice and have registered with another surgery all of half an hour ago :D

I'm just waiting on my details being added to their systems and I should be able to call tomorrow and secure an appointment for next week.

The optimistic side of me says I'll have had my BFP by then and I would have had to make an appointment anyway, the devil side says, if AF has arrived it makes sense to work out why her time keeping is so pants.

Either way, it's a step towards the positive.

Docs tomorrow... still no sign of anything either way.

Day 45

still hope!