Money

[endlesslove]

My dh decided to get into a complete hissy fit last night as is worried that when we finally are expecting our first baby we won't be able to afford it.

He doesn't want me to continue to work full time once the baby arrives and wants to be able to afford to keep the family. To be honest I wouldn't want to go back to work but if I had to then I would.

Is this normal for men or women to worry about money and if they can afford everything?

I think dh is worrying as he owns his own firm. He has now got me thinking and we are so desperate to be parents but am now thinking about the money side and it is scary isn't it. DH said he doesn't want to stop ttc, so I just think he was having a "what if" moment.

they really don't cost that much (unless you let them) - the biggest cost will be not having your income. If you can live on just DH's income now then you should be fine.

dp done that when ttc baby no2 he was on a low salary and ds was 3 so we didn't want a bigger age gap than there was, but he went a bit down as he thought we couldn't afford it, i was also a stay at home with no income, dd was born and we didn't have much money but then again we budgeted what we did have, dd is now 3 and she hasn't cost us the earth we make do with what we've got, i think men panick a bit too much but then women are a lot more laid back when it comes to money

I stress a bit about this and am bit of a control freak and have therefore worked out what i wil get on Mat pay how much i will need to save up while preggers to cover the bills and how many hours i need to go back to work part time to live confortably.

TBH though i don't think they cost as much as you think and am sure there are changes you can make to make life easier.

part of me would love to be a full time mum but would be OD every month, and in a way i won't to go back to work for me.

People do cope though so am sure you will be fine.

that should be want to not won't to

My dp has said this many a time about men. He went through it when I fell pregnant with dd and he/we have seen every one of our male friends go through it. The cave man comes out in them and they get very worried about having to be the provider because once a little one is there it is more important and it suddenly feels like it will all fall on them. I think it is something that they all have to go through and show that they are being the responsible grown-ups that we want them to be. It is quite normal.

We were not well off when I got pregnant, but I started putting together a 'fighting fund' when we ttc-d and then for the 9 months leading up to the birth. As it turned out we didn't really need it because if you are canny a new baby needn't cost much (unlike what is published in the media). You can beg/borrow most of their equipment & clothes, get things off ebay so you only need to fork out for the essentials. They don't cost anything in food either, especially if you breastfeed. And then you go out so little that you actually don't spend nearly as much as you normally would.

NEVER think of the money!!! NOONE would get preg! As long as you know you are relativly ok now, you will manage.

cx

Buy as much of your big stuff second hand - you'll save a fortune. You WILL be able to afford the baby cos you adjust your lifestyle (you won't be going out/drinking/eating out etc as much as you used to)

My family and I live off a very small income (under 10,000) and my DD wants for nothing. I read an article about how the most expensive part of parenting is the teen and University years. Plenty of time to plan and save for them if you're still TTC!