So here goes......

[Ifallelsefailsdrinktea85]

Sorry if this is long but this is my story so far...
Last September we found out I was pregnant, not planned fell on change over of pills. Took a week or so to get used to the idea but then were both really happy. I had an early scan as I didn't know exactly how far I was saw a strong heartbeat and everything looked fine (7 weeks) a few days before my 12 week scan I had a very small bleed but no pain, paid and had a private scan as hospital wouldn't see me sooner as they said I only had a few days to wait so at PP scan no heartbeat. We were devastated. Had medical management the following weekend, this was all just before Xmas. We decided to try again straight away so here we are now on cycle #8 and no BFP. We dtd regularly and my periods are pretty regular (every month) all be it slightly long between 31 and 35 days. I'm having a bit of a feel sorry for myself day and feeling like a complete failure of not being able to do achieve such a simple thing! And what's wrong with me. The past couple of months I have been calm and patient with an attitude of it will happen but not today. Just wanted to get it off my chest.

Any ideas of what else we can do/try?

Hello there's a lot of similar ladies on the ttc buses, if you'd like to join us. I also had an mc and then was ttc for over 18mts before it actually happened after that. Now giving it a go again and so far 6 mts without anything.

Lots of ladies have found temping helpful to definitely catch ov. We've got all sorts of weird and wonderful combos of ideas from green bed sheets, to drinking cough medicine and eating pineapple. Do join us if you feel you'd like to.

Oh it's miserable isn't it. I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage.

I expect that it took a few months for your body to get back to normal after your loss so try not to see it as 8 months of failure!! You need to be kinder to yourself.

We spent ages trying for dc2 after dc1 was an accident. On the month I finally got pregnant I was following a low carb/high protein diet, no alcohol, ate a slice of pineapple including the core (old wives tale) from the day of ovulation for 5 days and had acupuncture before and after ovulation.

I have no idea if any of these things helped but I did them all that month for the first time and we were lucky!

Best of luck, don't be too hard on yourself x

I completely understand why you are frustrated (have been there myself) but would also like to reassure you that you are statistically "normal". It's very common, sadly, to have a MC before 12 weeks. It's also common to take up to a year to get pregnant - I think 6 months is the average so 8 months isn't far past that. So chances are there is absolutely nothing "wrong" with you and you have just been unlucky.

Having said that, there are a few things you could do:

• Try to DTD more around mid cycle - you can use OPKs or temping to try to pinpoint ovulation date

• Ask GP to order blood tests - known as day 7 and day 21 tests (though actually the day 21 tests should be done at 7 days post ovulation, so that may be more like day 24/25 for you). These will check if you are actually ovulating as well as various other basic factors that can affect fertility, such as thyroid function. Usually GPs will only do this after a year of TTCing unless you are over 35 in which case it's 6 months.

• Look out for EWCM (stretchy clear cervical mucus) and DTD more when you see it - if you don't see it, you could try Pre-seed or another conception friendly lubricant

• Irregular periods can be a sign of PCOS. Do you have any other signs - overweight, acne, hairiness? If so it's worth asking the GP to refer you for a scan of your ovaries.

Thanks everyone, I don't really want to get into temping and ov tests as it seems more pressure. We dtd pretty much every other day (pretty much always been like that). My periods are every month just not exact days. Before I fell pregnant last year I was on the pill for 13 years. (I'm 28) When I had my scans after mmc they checked my ovaries, tubes etc and said everything looked fine and couldn't see an obvious cause or anything for concern.

Oh and I'm fit (regularly exercise) and eat healthy. :)

In that case I am not sure there is much more you can do - if you dtd every other day anyway then no real point in OPKs and temping.

In your shoes, I'd ask for blood tests. Just to rule out anything obvious. For example I tried for 11 months and then I found out via blood tests that I had underactive thyroid - got pg almost immediately once I started medication for it. Wish I'd had the tests earlier! However be prepared that the GP may say not until 1 year of TTC given your age.

Do pcos and endo go together? I was diagnosed with endo a long time ago. I've always assumed the pain I'm in is signally down to that. But since I had my last son my acne has really flared up and periods although sometimes were a day or 2 late are now completely erratic. As soon as I'm moved I'll be joining a new gp practice hip hip hooray!

I don't know whether PCOS and endo go together mrs (don't think so?) but I think endo is itself often connected with hormonal imbalance. So you might benefit from things that help regulate hormones too. Hope you get some good advice from your new GP.

Mini my hormones have always been chaotic I was diagnosed with an under active thyroid at 16. So have taken artificial thyroxine for 18 yrs. don't think that helps as it's never been stable for long. I'm on very high strength apparently for all the good it's doing?!

Op have you had your thyroid tested?

Yes I had it tested about 4 years ago as part of routine bloods for something else.

Might be worth testing again? A lot can change in 4 yrs.

Maybe, but I don't seem to have any symptoms for under or over active. I do wonder whether my periods are down to being on the pill for so long and then the pregnancy maybe my body/hormones are still adjusting? I don't see my periods being that irregular just that they seem to fall between 31 and 33 (once 35), a couple of my friends are like that too.

It's actually cycle #7 we are now on, miscounted!