3 month break after 'delayed period'??

[Fingerscrossed10]

Hi ladies,
I have just suffered 2 'delayed periods' both with positive tests pregnancy tests and all the symptoms. I have no idea why and the doctor just said 'chin up and keep trying' but also recommended a 3 month break. When I queried this he could offer no medical reason as to why!
Just wondered if anyone else has been in this situation and seen a more helpful doctor than mine!!!
X

Hi fingerscrossed it sounds like you have suffered chemical pregnancies - sorry to hear this has happened to you twice, it is a really crappy, disheartening thing to happen. From what I understand of it it is when you conceive but implantation doesnt occur. It usually means the pregnancy isnt viable and it is sometimes described as a very early miscarriage before anything could have been picked up on ultrasound - although I have only ever read that term online and never heard it mentioned in rl.

I had a chemical pregnancy a couple of weeks ago. I got a faint positive 5 days after my period didnt show up and the same day a digital confirmed pregnant 1-2 weeks. However the next day I did another dye test and it was even fainter. I saw my gp a couple of days later to see what was going on. She did her own test which came back positive a couple more days later and I was obviously delighted. Then two days after that I started bleeding.

I had what should have been my appointnent to discuss my positive result but had to tell her I no longer was. I was lucky in a way because I had it documented as a pregnancy albeit a shortlived one, but from what i've heard, some women barely have it acknowledged which can be hard if like me it felt like a loss to you.

When I saw my GP on Monday she told me it was very very common and that it is not a sign of anything being wrong. In fact she said it is a good thing that your body recognises that something is wrong in the pregnancy and that you are able to conceive. She said that some women would never have noticed and it was only because I knew my dates.

I asked how soon I could try and she said wait three months!! I was shocked and asked why and she said to just give your body time to heal and because they would worry about anaemia and "things"...although didnt have a precise answer. I pressed her further later in the conversation and asked if I really had to wait soblong since it had happened so early and she said that the nhs are just cautious and that where she comes from (she is Indian) women lose a baby and try again straight away, get pregnant and are fine. She then ended the conversation telling me to eat an drink well, rest, and try again when I wanted to. So I think really it is just standard nhs guidelines after pregnancy loss.

I am trying again this month. Good luck whatever you decide to do

Thank you so much for your message!
It's such a weird thing, had so many symptoms this time around which I didn't last time so thought it was going to all be ok. I did the same as you booked an appt with the doc as I was pregnant only to have to go and tell them I no longer was! It's sad but feel there was obviously a reason my body rejected it so I hang on to that thought.
I'm still undecided about what to do this month, I think i might try but also concerned I'm going to be such a worry wort that it will happen again if I am even a second late!
Good luck to you!! Let me know how it goes
Fingers crossed xxx

No problem, glad I could help a bit! Its horrible isnt it, I was so looking forward to that doctors appointment to get the ball rolling on midwife appointments etc so it was a kick in the teeth to have to go and say that the positive result she was about to discuss was no longer positive.

I managed to accept what had happened fairly quickly even though I am still sad it didnt work out. I think the only good thing this month is that I don't really know if the first day of the bleed can be counted as the first day of my cycle so I don't really know when af is due. I'm going to wait six weeks from when I started bleeding if I haven't come on and that way I'm hoping I shouldn't be too early if we are very lucky to catch again this month. Although trying not to get too hopeful as I know that would be exceptionally lucky.

Will let you know and have my fingers crossed for you too

It's just nice to talk to someone who has been through the same... Some how it makes me feel less of a loon!
Same I think all the dates and things will be a bit skewed though saying that I went right back to my normal cycle in march after the similar thing happening in feb. I think I'm going to try not look at dates and just relax this month and see what happens.
I'm ok just feel now I want it even more! We went out to lunch yesterday and the OH started smiling and playing with a little boy about 6 months and it totally broke my heart! He is going to be such a good dad and I'm gutted that so far it's not worked out for us
Maybe 3rd time lucky!!
Fingers crossed xxx

Its so hard isnt it...we found out days after my cp that my dsd's mum who swore she'd never have any more dcs is pregnant and the baby is due the same month ours would have been...so my dps little girl is going to have another sibling, but not from us. Massive salt to wound!

But...have managed to remain philosophical about it and remember that other people havings babies will not have an affect on whether we do, and you just never know what other people have been through before they make that pregnancy announcement. One day it'll be our turn for that excitement too, so keep your chin up!

Youre definately not a loon though, from what ive seen on mn it is pretty common and so so disappointing and upsetting when you have been ttc. Its nice to have someone to talk to though, has really helped me too after a crappy few weeks as I think my dp is pretty disappointed too so I dont want to keep going over it with him as he isnt one for talking these things through!

Oh no, that must be really hard! Poor you! That sounds like the last person you would want to be pregnant right now!! Amazing you've managed to put a positive spin on it! (Feel free to b*tch about this when required I can only imagine the fake smiling and nodding you have to do to get through this!)
I think it's a little different and possibily more real to us that to the OH and the pesky hormones don't help! My OH only knew for a matter of hours before it all went wrong.... Same thing last time, I've decided not to tell him next time as it's obviously bad luck!!! Hopefully he will notice before I go into labour!!!! Hehehe!!!
How's this month going for you? What's your dates? (Yes I know I said I wouldn't think about it but so hard not to!)
Fingers crossed xxx

Haha oh no trust me, the positivity is just a defense mechanism I think, it's all I can do really as dwelling on it or anyone else's pregnancy would just drive me completely mad. Had a little cry though too!

Yep you are definately right, I think because it is our bodies it's more real for us. How are you feeling now? Hope youre ok.

I know the "not knowing dates" hasnt gone as planned has it?! Haha! I am taking the first day of bleeding as first day of my cycle although taking this with a pinch of salt. So am loosely expecting af around 16th. I dont track ovulation but had lots of ewcm this week and ov pain which lasted until sat so I think I ov'd at some point this weekend which would work date wise. Managed to dtd previous sun, mon, wed, twice friday (!), and sunday so i'm a bit worried I missed actual ov day which I think was sat, so I don't feel too hopeful! How about you?

Well I think that's amazing that you can see the positive side to these things.... you're right I guess we have to for our own sanity!!!
Yeah I'm ok though think I have a kidney infection on the way... It's my stress illness so it's obviously still at the back of my mind somewhere!
I know, who were we kidding?!? Hahaha! I have an app on my phone it's just too easy to look and actually really want to keep it updated with info this month incase it happens again. My af would be due the 22nd and should ov anytime now but can't really tell what's going on as loads of twinges and stuff due to impending kidney infection. I'm trying to manage it with herbal medicine and just hoping I don't have to resort to anti bs!
I'm don't hold much hope this month either but hey who knows what's going to happen in this game!!
Fingers crossed xxx

Ahh no sorry to hear that, thats all you need! Hope you dont feel too ill with it! Just some advice though that I learned the hard way...I had really bad tonsillitis last month around the time or not long after ovulation. I didnt take paracetomol and really worked up a fever before finally going to the doctors to get antiobiotics because I was so ill. It was all because I was so worried about affecting my chances, but the doctor said some abs are fine to take and that I should have taken paracetemol to get my temp down. I have since read that fever is not good in early pregnancy and I now cant help wondering of that is what caused my body to reject the pregnancy. May not have been of course but just dont let yourself get too ill before getting treatment.

Oh that sounds good, what app is that? Haha I know, it is impossible to be laid back about this isnt it!! Do you track ov in any other way? If I dont get a bfp this month I am going to start tracking ov a bit more closely because I need to feel ive done all I can now, it seems playing it cool isnt working! Youre not due long after me then, and that is so true, you just never know! Will be keeping everything crossed for you too!

Ah thanks! I'm ok, good point though! I used to suffer from it so badly a few years ago so I'm quite good at tackling it without abs so hopefully will be all ok, am feeling much better today already
You mustn't think like that or next time you get a bfp (or even before that!) you won't ever do anything! I know it's tough but we must never ever blame ourselves!
I think the app is called fertility friend, it's free you can upgrade it but haven't really felt the need to it just tracks dates and stuff. I've tried the temperature tracking but just found that annoying and I never really got anything out of it. I've also got tests but again I probably don't wee on them enough to make the most of them! The app is my weaknesses, don't say I didn't warn you!!
Fingers crossed xxx

Ahh good i'm glad youre feeling better! I know I know, I think it's just hard to accept something like that without a reason isnt it, it's like if you have a reason you can control it next time or something. But with my ds I wasn't even trying to get pregnant so god knows what I took/did in the 7 weeks before I found out!

Ooh I think I may download (I feel an obsession coming on!), I will consider myself warned though! Glad to hear i'm not the only one who has been a little lazy over this tracking ovulation thing haha. I am slightly addicted to reading the Conception board on here though to see what is working for other people, and tempted to go all out next month...opks, preseed, the lot!

How long have you been trying now?

Ah you already have a ds! Lucky you! How old is she? At least you know you can do it!! This is my first and am 34... My clock is ticking so loudly it's a constant distraction!!! Hehe
I know, I go through fits and starts with it all measuring everything and nothing then I get fed up with it when I'm still not pregnant!!! I agree reading all the stories on here is seriously addictive and helps you to realise you are not alone with all these feelings, trials and tribulations!
I've been trying since November, you?
Fingers crossed xxx

Ahh sorry yes he is 15months I know I am really lucky, love him to pieces! It's funny because before you have one you worry about whether you can have any and think that even if you could only have one that would satisfy the broodiness, and to a certain extent there is a relief that you can have at least one.

But trying for no2 brings a whole host of new worries...I am currently stressing about ds having a sibling close in age, and then there is secondary infertility and i'm worrying there will be damage caused by his traumatic birth, or that my hormones are messed up because I breastfed him for 13mo, or because I have since found out I have a fibroid! But that said, this is only my third cycle and I know it os early days!

The fact you have had two chemicals is a good sign for you too you know...my gp said it is good because it shows you can conceive and that your body is capable of recognising problems quickly. So hopefully it will happen really soon for you!!

Ah bless him! Cute age... But how do you even have time to worry about all these things?!? Hehehe
Oh no sorry to hear about the fibroids are they treating them or do you just have to suffer?
Yes we must look at the positives and it obviously wasn't meant to be this time but hopefully one day it will!
P.s don't ever mention traumatic births again!! I'm trying not to block that part from my mind! You have obviously done the same or you wouldn't be considering it again!
Fingers crossed x

Haha I have always been a ridiculous worrier, I worry in my sleep and everything! Ahh thanks it is just one and it has been described as the start of a fibroid and apparently not a big deal so the gp says, thank god. I only found out I had it in passing whilst having a scan for something else, it doesnt cause me any bother!

Haha sorry, my ds was almost 10lb and I'm not that big so don't worry, it wont happen to you!! Hows your kidney infection now? Hope youre feeling better. Did you decide whether to try this month in the end?

Oh no you're not a sleep talker are you? My OH is one of them, it drives me mad though can be very funny and at least I know what's on his mind!!
Yikes! That's huge!! No wonder it was interesting!
Yeah feeling much better now thank you.
Well... Ummmm... We haven't done anything to prevent getting pregnant but haven't been a slave to it! It's hard not to though isn't it?
Fingers crossed x

Haha not as far as I know, I just have strange dreams when I worry! My dp sleep talks too, its entertaining isnt it!

Glad to hear youre feeling better . Maybe a month off intensely trying will do you the World of good and you never know it could be the lucky month, it is so unpredicatable!

Oh yes it is so consuming once you make the decision. As I dont track ov apart from looking out for ewcm and having a rough date range, i'm always convinced that today is the day and i'm terrified of taking a night off incase I miss it. Sometimes we are both so tired though we just want to go to sleep!!

Yes it is very entertaining though I'm very tired today!!
Very true but I'm not really holding out much hope. Think I've just got it in mind we should wait a bit so not expecting it this month but I guess it could happen...
Haha! Yeah that's the difficult bit isn't it, don't want to make it feel like a chore!!!

I know, it's a challenge trying to keep it feeling romantic when you have to be so timed with sex...thats the problem with not monitoring ov in anyway, think I may give opks a go next month!!

Hope you have had a lovely weekend anyway, keep me posted on how you get on and I will do the same! If I count my chem as my last period, I would be due af on friday but if it doesnt come I'm going to give it another week or two before I think about testing to be sure so potentially got a bit of a wait yet! [Smile]

even!

I had to confess to the OH about my app this weekend as he suggested we download one!! I think I'm going to struggle even more now to be 'spontaneous' now he knows I'm tracking our every move!!! Hehe!!
Have you downloaded it yet?
I think I'm a week later the 22nd, how are you feeling? Im still not feeling very positive this month.
Fingers crossed xxx

So glad I found this post! I had a BFP on Wednesday 7th May, only to start bleeding on the Friday. Popped down to the docs and was told to go home, keep my fingers crossed and prepare for the worst!

Like you ladies after a few tears I got my head around it very quickly- and we've decided to start trying again straight away.....

In the mean time I've loaded up on pre conception books and can't read enough!

Ahh becky I have actually read your other thread, so sorry to hear it happened to you too, it is so crap! Glad youre feeling better now, I found it strange how quickly I felt positive again but was glad because I had a couple of days of feeling overwhelming sadness and being constantly teary so I just wanted that feeling to lift.

Good luck with your preconception research and with this cycle!!

Hi Becky!
So sorry to hear you have suffered the same as us too. I think our pesky hormones help the situation in those early days!
Any good tips in your books? I haven't bought any yet...

Also just realised it's the 16th tomorrow dreamer anything to report?!?!

Fingers crossed xxx

Obviously I meant our hormones don't help!!