when did u lose your baby miss sunshine? the dr in the hosp told me to expect AF in 4, 6, 8 weeks after the bleeding from the evacuation surgery, but I had very little bleeding after it, a few spots. she also told me to wait until after my first period to try again or start the pill. I couldn't wait to start the pill, because I have mental imagery of my uterus looking like a nuclear war ground, with dead trees and rocks lying around! DH doesn't like to use a condom, so I knew I couldn't consider accidentally getting pregnant in the first few weeks after (I needed to heal myself) but I wanted to DTD and be close to DH immediately! I spoke to my dr and he said as long as I started it within 5 days of the op I'd be protected, and to reassure myself (I felt very guilty about doing something to help ME) I phoned the Tommys helpline. I spoke to a midwife who said if I want to be on the pill, I should be, no one can tell me how to feel. also because I was crying on the phone to her, she said it would help my hormones. I suppose I was putting it off, like you! it has helped me, and AF arrived on Wednesday, sore and heavy for 2 days, much better today though.
although I talk about our baby, the hospital, finding out, the surgery, the pain, my cycle CONSTANTLY to DH he has spoken precisely twice to me about it of his own accord.
when I found out we were pregnant I told him every twinge, nauseous feeling, craving because I wanted him to own our pregnancy too, cos it wasn't all about me. he cried the day we found out it was over then he clammed up - and I find out now, when i'm upset he doesn't want to add to it, and when I'm not, he doesn't want to start something! ! lol
I askef him if we could try again soon, because I wanted to see if he was as cautious as me, and he ssid he wanted to try exactly when I thought I was ready. I told him I felt guilty about getting us pregnant, then losing the baby - because it was my idea to try, then I didn't end up producing him a bundle of joy (I know you're not supposed to blame yourself but its impossible).
I didn't want to try again because I didn't want to break his heart again if it doesn't work out. it turns out he wants to try more than anything, he has a wee bit of his heart set aside for our baby, and he feels empty waiting for it to come.
could you talk to your OH along these lines, I was so surprised to find all this out. I thought we couldn't be any closer and now we are. if we're never blessed with a baby, I am so happy to have my soulmate!
my gp said a miscarriage is a blip, a delay, its not an end. I found that hard to take at the time, but now I see, we're stronger for it, and if we're to have more blips or delays, bring them on now, im 34 and I don't have time to waste!! lol xx