First time TTC! But we're not actively trying....?

[WinterBlondie83]

Hello everyone.

My husband and I have put off TTC our first child as we wanted to move house first. However 7 months on, we are ready!

I have a number of friends who are having IVF due to conception issues and tbh, any pregnancy talks I've had with them over last year have been negative/intense. I understand this and their frustrations completely, but I decided that when we 'removed the goalie' so to speak, I would stay relaxed and take a 'whatever will be, will be' attitude.

BUT, since having sex for the first time without contraception, I can already feel myself becoming fixated on whether or not we've been successful!

Is is really impossible to be laid back about TTC? Just to be clear, DH and I are in very early stages here and way too early to know if 1st attempt was successful but I'm annoyed with myself for wanting it so bad, so early on.
Does that make sense to anyone?

Makes sense to me Winter, and the feeling will be familiar to you every month until you conceive (unless you're one of the lucky ones and get your BFP straight away, which I hope you do).

I had DS after TTC for 10 years. I was told I would never conceive naturally and I had a lot of unsuccessful IVF.

I don't know if DS was a miracle or not but we are already TtC number 2. Three periods in and I am already having these feelings every month and I know DC #2 may never happen.

I wonder why I am doing this to myself again after I stopped trying 2 years ago? I guess because my body did it once and I'm expecting another miracle.

Good luck and don't waste money on loads of sticks to pee on

I think it is impossible to be laid back, however I am quite obsessive!

I also went into this thinking we could try but not actively. Since that point I am now using an ovulation predictor kit, pre-seed and testing as soon as possible (I am trying to be more restrained this month). So I know how you feel!

First time round I was very laid back, like you we decided we wanted to get settled into our house before starting a family. I think because MIL and a couple of friends had a lot of trouble conceiving we weren't expecting it to happen as quickly as it did. I know we were very lucky but as I really wasn't expecting it, it's like I wasn't waiting for it, just assumed it would take us at least a good few months so didn't see any point in getting anxious about it.

When we started trying for no.2 I was definitely all about ovulation calendars and counting the days until I could test. after a miscarriage last year I'm trying to be more relaxed and not get obsessed about it.

Good luck!