Almost 41, chemical pregnancy a year ago, good timing...however

[Whitetara]

Hi

I'm almost 41 and had a chemical pregnancy a year ago after getting pregnant completely unexpectedly and easily. I do have 2 other children of 4 and 6 conceived with ease, but now things are so different.

I've had tests done and I"m ovulating and there's nothing medically wrong with me, my cycles are regular within a few days, but still absolutely zilch. Doctor thinks that it's unlikely to be my other half as he was the father of the other two and it may be my age, but she didn't think I was all that old.

I've tried OPKs and temping but I get anxious when waiting for a positive result and sometimes I miss the surge (or I must do as I still have AF at the usual time even without the positive), I've timed bd with them, but still to no avail.

I feel old .

Proverbial question: Does anyone have any suggestions?

Hi Whitetara,

I'm in a similar position. I'm 40, conceived the first month of trying last year but had a m/c at 9 weeks. I've now been TTC for 7 months and no joy. Like you, I'm using an opk each month (I am getting the smilies) and can't find a reason why it's not happening apart from age :(

There's a whole group of women on here all over 40, all TTC, some struggling and others with fabulous encouraging stories, come and join the Fabulous-Fecund-Over-Forties-TTC thread.

I was in a similar position to you - getting stressed out every month, making sure we 'try' on the right days etc. Honestly, it just causes more stress - it even causes a lot of men to get 'stage fright' iykwim (this happened to DH a few times!).
If you are having regular periods then you will probably know when you are ovulating. Ditch the OPKs and temping - there is a whole industry making money out of women like us getting stressed and obsessive! Just 'try' every other day from about CD 5 or 6 (depends on how long your cycles are obviously). You'll know the right time by checking mucus etc anyway.
I went to a fertility specialist. Everything was normal (I'm 42 now). You've just got more chromosomally abnormal eggs as well as lots of perfect ones, so it does take longer.
One thought though - you could ask for an HSG. They shoot dye up into your tubes and check there is no blockage. You may have to pay privately. We were trying for 8 months, then I had the HSG. Although the tubes were clear, the Dr said it often clears away small mucus plugs which may cause a slight blockage. I conceived 2 months after the HSG, miscarried (5 weeks), conceived again 2 months later, miscarried again (7 weeks), then conceived 2 months after that. I'm now almost 15 weeks and all going well so far!
Good luck. It WILL happen, but ditch the OPK's! xx

By the way, almost 41 is not old!!

thanks. I feel better after reading your kind posts. what journeys you've both beenergy on! I think ill take a look at the fecund forties thread.

I know what you mean about stage fright as well. hubby is a teacher and is exhausted weekdays which doesn't help. last week was my window but I had flu and now I've got some symptoms. oh well.

i've not done a fertility test for a while as I wondered if the anxiety was actually delaying ovulation.

I was with someone at the weekend who had got pregnant unexpectedly. I'd love another oops iykwim. I keep trying to pretend (hope) that will happen...

I guess I must have a fair few chromosomally poor ones. just wish that perfect one would pop out. perhaps I should give the tube clearing some thought.

correction: pms symptoms