Going bonkers - TTC post MC

[Luckystar1]

I just thought I'd indulge myself in another moan. It's my first 2ww since mmc in Sept. I don't know when I o'd but I'. Defo out this month due to a weekend away with friends and male performance issues. Trying not to go mad, or blame anyone (dh) but seriously I need your swimmers man Ffs just suck it up and get on with it!!! I'll do everything else for the next 9 months!!

And practically everyone I know is successfully pregnant, I feel like a failure as a woman! And I just wanted to be pregnant for Christmas.

Ok moan/rant over... And breathe!

Hi lucky,

Sorry to hear about your mmc, I too had a mmc in September. I took a while for my af to return and I am supposed to be in my fertile window now but I'm thinking it is later as no ewcm or pains at all (had pains last month).

I was hoping to be pregnant by Xmas but would be shocked as dh is working away this week anyway and I was on holiday with friends last month when ov so knew that was out! Very frustrating and am finding it hard hearing about all the pregnancies that others go on about!

You are def not a failure and a mmc is in no way anyone's fault even though I went through 100 thoughts about what I might have done/said/thought that could have caused mine :( but deep down I know it just wasn't the right way it needed to be,

Xx

Thanks Chosen, sorry to hear about your mc, I hope you're feeling a bit stronger. I have found the whole thing soul destroying, the wondering if I'll ever have a baby is so overwhelming!

But fx for us both. Maybe we will get lucky and have a nice Christmas surprise! Keep well, keep positive, it will happen (I believe that about 70% of the time anyway!) x

Hey can I join this thread?

I conceived my DD naturally 2 years ago, after ttc for 3 years!

I assumed it would take similar length of time to conceive again, as we never knew what the problem was, so decided to 'leave it to fate' from 6 months after she was born.

Imagine my surprise, however, after only having unprotected sex once, to find out I was pg again!

Unfortunately I started bleeding at around 6 weeks, and suffered a m/c. That was back in March, and I'm still not pg again :-( The babies due date has just passed and I feel a bit shit!

Recently there's been a whole barrage of people announcing pregnancies, and all I feel is resentment. It should be me!

Just looking for some support really from people who have been through it and can understand where I'm coming from (DH does his best, but he doesn't really 'get' it. Bless him!)

xxx

Hello Amelia of course you can! Sorry for your loss and sorry that you're feeling down. Our bodies seem so cruel sometimes especially when some fortunate people never luckily experience the heartache.

I had lots of RL support immediately post mc, but now no one (except my dh) cares. My dm seems to spend every call we have relaying more pregnancie. which, even if unintended, seems unnecessarily ill considered to me!!

But sadly all we can do it hope (err and dtd a lot!!) and someday it'll be our turn! (this is mostly what allows me to make it through the days!!)

Ps sorry for the atrocious spelling I'm on a very temperamental phone!

Hardly anyone knew about my mc as it was so early on. I'd told a couple of friends, but was still on mat leave so not many at work needed to know.

Now I wish I'd told more people. I really went into denial at first, I really didn't expect for a second I would be still so overwhelmingly upset about it and now I have no one to talk to about it.

It seems like people don't really talk about it after a while. It genuinely was the worst feeling in the world. I could feel my baby bleeding out of me, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

I thought by now I would be pg again, and so would have another little life to look forward to, but instead all I feel is empty inside. Every month that passes by I feel worse instead of better.

I really don't know what to do. How do you cope?

I'm only in my first cycle post mc, so the coping is still by way of hoping! Could you see your GP to see if there's anything they can do? And my dh suggested grief counselling for me, I didn't go, but would definitely consider it if I feel low.

X

Yeah I dunno, talking to a stranger just feels weird to me. The only thing that will make me feel better I think is to be pregnant again.

I just don't understand how I can fall after just having sex once, but then go months and months and nothing happen!

The mystery of the female body I suppose! xxx

I know what you mean. I feel the same about getting pregnant and it just feels like it's going to be such a mission!! Oh well! We need to keep positive (plaster the fake smiles on) and it'll happen (so I keep being told!!)