Need a bit of hand-holding please

[RaRaZ]

Just feeling a bit crap and sorry for myself today. I'm on the 4th cycle of ttc after losing two pgs earlier this year. That's crap enough I think, but I'm starting to think I have a problem with one of my ovaries.... I didn't ovulate in my July cycle (Day 21 test), did in August, and then this month I don't think I have again as I've had no ovulation pain and my chart looks suspiciously like the annovulatory charts in Taking Charge of Your Fertility. I've booked a Day 21 test, which will be next week, but I'm thinking that I only ovulate every other month or from one ovary, which is frankly scaring me shitless. I've got a horrible feeling that the GP will refuse to even look into it until we've been trying for a year, and I'm worried about there being something wrong with my ovaries/tubes/hormone levels/etc that will just get left for months on end. I'm feeling really really down today. I got back in this morning and my bf announced that his best mate, his gf, and their two kids were about to descend on the place - he hadn't thought to tell me this before and I really can't deal with people today. They've got a baby too - just what I want rubbed in my face. They've gone out and I'm sat at home trying to hold myself together. I know plenty of people on here have gone through far worse and I probably sound incredibly pathetic, but I just need a little hand-holding today.

Hi Raraz,

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time. I know it's hard, but try and not assume the worst. You know you didn't ovulate one month, but that does happen. You're not sure if there is anything wrong with your ovary, and not everyone switches from ovary to ovary every month. So things might not be as bad as you fear, and even if there is something wrong, once you have the right meds it can go very quickly. But I understand it's frustrating to have to wait so long to get answers.

I'm frustrated myself, since stopping the pill my cycles have not been right. I just want to get it sorted as soon as possible, but these things take time. I will go to the GP next month if things haven't improved and I wouldn't take any of that 'one year' crap. If there is something wrong with your cycles, that one year rule doesn't count, that only goes if everything seems normal but you're not conceiving. Also, be honest to the GP and tell him how emotionally upsetting this is, and maybe they'll be more inclined to do something about it.

Big hugs, stay strong! Oh and I agree with blamber, you should tell your GP how upsetting this all is or you. Don't be alone! Take care xxx

Thanks, both of you . I've got a Day 21 test booked for next week, so I guess I'll get a definite answer then and be able to take it back to the GP if I'm right and I haven't ovulated. My chart definitely looks annovulatory though . I'm just scared that if it is going to be like this, it's going to take me so long to conceive .