erectile dysfunction rant

[Brodicea]

Been charting, peeing on sticks, temping, yesterday was the ideal time to do the deed. DH knows vaguely when we're fertile but I don't tell him or pressure him as he's prone to erectile dysfunction. We keep things romantic and usually have really good sex. Sunday we had sex twice in one day!
Last night, we started to DTD and it goes down again. Often when it goes down it comes back with a bit of a break and some coaxing, but no, back to floppy todger-mode.
I was so angry and upset I had a massive tantrum and started drawing on all my irrational hurts and worries and crying and I made him cry and it was awful.
I just feel so angry, and I know it isn't his fault. I'm happy that he isn't the sort of bloke who just sticks it anywhere and gets on with it like a robot - he always senses when it gets dull and is very sensitive to my needs (sorry, sounds so cheesy!) - but for once why can't he just get on with it/???
I feel so irrationally angry. The poor bugger was probably worn out from Sunday :oS It's been almost a year TTC and I'm so frustrated!
Am really considering the turkey baster method.
Rant over.

Are you doing anything to help? Cock rings help maintain erections, and Viagra gets things going in the first place.

If your husband is the type to feel embarrassed and offended by these suggestions, nothing will get better.

My boyfriend has delayed ejaculation and it was really starting to get to me but we just stuck to it n tried some different things and now he manages to cum nearly every single time.

Sorry my point there was, try and not get upset and talk it through to find a solution.

Thanks loves - he might get embarrassed about a cock ring, but I have considered suggesting it. He's pretty open minded about sex toys in general so maybe he'd be up for it (pardon the pun!). I'll see if we can talk about it and suggest it.
I guess TTC desperation is probably a turn-off, not matter how well I think I'm hiding it, I'm thinking we should make time to take our time as well in future rather than rush into it!

Brod - my DH has long-term erectile dysfunction.

One thing you may (not!) wish to think about is that it can be a sign of underlying health issues. DH has been checked out by a consultant andrologist so we know he is okay, but it can be an early sign of cardiovascular disease, apparently. If this is happening increasingly he should go to a GP.

DH has been prescribed Cialis which is a bit like Viagra and helps.

Also, it really is not his fault. I say that as someone who has dealt with this for 5 years (!) so I do appreciate how you are feeling.

Are you doing what you can do enable conception, ie charting, OPKs etc?

You need to take the pressure off yourselves as of now before this problem gets any worse and you both become further frustrated. You may not like this but I would stop all the charting etc as of now because that can also add to the overall pressure you are both putting yourselves under. Also you need to get the idea out of your head that x date is the ovulation date or any ideas about timing of intercourse. Ovulation is not such an exact science and it can occur earlier, later or not at all in any given cycle.

I would now look into getting medical advice from the GP as you have been ttc now for almost a year. It will not do any harm and the GP can arrange for you both to have some tests done.

Also does he smoke? This can contribute to ED, as can diabetes.

Brodicea Get a vibrating cock ring - and tell him you bought for you. Then it becomes more about you wanting to take pleasure over the edge than his problem. That might ease any unhappy feelings he has.

I have already been to the Drs, and was told to come back at Xmas as in my health authority, they don't see you until you've been trying for 18 months - and I have another health issue (had PID briefly when I was v young which can muck up your tubes, although the Dr seemed unconcerned as I had a pregnancy since) so they're apparently doing me a massive favour seeing us then!

He doesn't smoke, but he isn't that fit - he's working on it (going running and playing sport as of the last few months), but I do worry about his heart. Although I'm aware even (and especially) very fit people can have heart trouble. It might be worth suggesting he see his Dr though...

Have been charting for the last four months: I've found it more calming than when we didn't as it did assure me that something was likely to be going on in my pipes, but I agree it does add a lot of underlying pressure.

We did manage to DTD last night and everything was fine - if a lot more spontaneous.

A double pronged approach I reckon , try a few new things in the bedroom (thanks MrsMongoose ) and encourage him to go to the Drs...