I think I need a kick up the bum

[Miaou]

I am quite embarrassed to write this but I need to get it out of my system

I am obsessed with getting pg, miserable when it doesn't happen, and find it hard to cope with announcements from friends who are pg. However - I have three kids already, am still breastfeeding ds who is only 10 months, and am only 34, so I really have nothing to complain about!

When we decided to have our kids, each time I was pregnant within days (or in the case of ds, within two cycles). We have been ttc since November (but my periods have not restarted so it's hardly a big surprise that nothing's happened!). I had wanted the same gap between ds and the next one as I had between dd1 and dd2 - but that date has come and gone and I'm still not pg - I think that upset me more than I anticipated really.

I am planning to give up bfing when ds is one, principally to give myself a chance to get pg - really hoped I wouldn't have to do that but I don't want to wait until he stops of his own accord.

I feel quite pathetic given the major problems some people have conceiving, I think all these emotions have caught me unawares.

Thank you for reading - you don't need to reply, but it helped to get this off my chest

If you think a kick up the bum is what you need to conceive, I've got news for you...

Seriously, that sounds miserable. You are fully entitled to be upset about it. Yes, other people have problems, but that doesn't stop your problems being important to you. God, did that make any sense?

I am like this too - well I have only 2 kids and am still BF dd2 who is 18 months but yet I really reallu want to be preganant and still bf dd2! I am only 27, but my mum couldn;t have anymoire after me - she wasn't even sure she could have me so I guess that has made me parionod!

well said edam, was trying to put that into words myself

the bit about being entitled to be sad not the bum bit

lol edam!

I feel a bit like people who whinge that they can't afford a second pair of Jimmy Choos when you buy your shoes for £7.99 down the market

know how you feel Miaou - was talking to a friend about this the other day and howI'm feeling sad cos have been ttc for a year now. DH and I said we wouldn't go to the GP or anything as we already have 2 healthy DSs but when I was telling her about it, I got really weepy.
I want another baby too
(and I'm a bit older than you too )

lol Lact8, love the clarification!
bum, bum, bum, bum, bum (as my 3yo likes to sing)

But it's something that you really want so you're bound to be frustrated that it's not happening as you want it too

I remember being irrationally annoyed that I had gone over due date with dd as it was 'messing up' my plans with maternity leave

FWIW I was pg with dd within weeks of stopping bfeeding ds2

That's what I'm hoping lact8 - just finding these last two months sooooo hard ...

Miaou I know exactly how you feel. I have one dd who has just turned a year and have been ttc since she was 6 months, except like you I had no af due to bf so it wasn't really trying I suppose just wishful thinking! I gave up b/feeding I suppose around 2 weeks ago (but had cut down drastically before that) and was so sad as I didn't want to. In a way it did seem natural though as dd didn't care one way or the other if it was bottle or breast just as long as it was milk! Af came last month and though I have demanded alot of sex of dh I just know it hasn't happened this month. In fact I just can't see it happening at all which is just absolutely ridiculous as technically this is our first month trying. I know what you mean about the age gap going by and I feel stupid now for all the "research" I did into double buggies (bit of an obsession!) when I'm not even going to need one- talk about counting your chickens!

Feel much better getting that rant off my chest, thank you!

poor you, you've got my sympathy as i just don't do patience

ecxuse rubbish typing/abtuptness feeding dd

sorry I disappeared - had to feed ds, ironically

bobblehead, I'm sorry you are in the same/similar position, but glad for me that I'm not alone in feeling like this! Hope my periods restart as quickly.