Is it selfish to want a third child?

[Pinky14]

Sorry if this is posted in the wrong place.

I have two children a 3 yr old girl and a 1 yr old boy. I really want a third. I just have a desire to have another one as I feel our family isn't complete yet. My heart just keeps telling me to have another but then my head kicks in and says I don't need to I have one of each and should be happy but then my head kicks in...

Is it selfish of me to want another one? Should I just be happy or should I go with what my body is telling me?

My husband is happy with two but open to the idea of another. I don't have any family around me so it will just be me (and hubbie when he isn't at work-obviously) looking after three. We have a big enough house etc.

There's no 'should'! If you can afford it, feel you have the time etc, and dh agrees, why the hell not?!

I agree with Pootles. There doesn't seem to be an obvious reason for you not to try for a third child. Why do you think it is selfish? (world resources?)

We have a third DC - he is 16 weeks old and more planned than either of the others. We worked out what impact another DC would have on our lives - space, finances, holidays, car etc. We felt we were/are in the position to be able to meet these changing needs and can afford him and have enough space for him.

If both you and DH agree then why not - and it is usually just me (and DP around work) looking after ours.

Goodness no I am TTC #4 I said the samething I just feel i have one more to come :) If you can afford it and your hubby and kids are all for it go for it x

I agree there is no 'should' about it. It is a decision for your family and nobody else so do what is right for you and your DH. I had 3 and have never regretted it for a minute. They are grown up now but we are all very close still.

Your body, your family, your decision, if you can afford it and cope and more importantly are able to then go for it! I would!

Thanks, I think when I say selfish. I mean that - I don't really know what i mean! I guess having to divide more time between children so they won't get as much one on one me time but if your clever with your time and plan that isn't neccesarily the case. I'm guessing.

I'm middle one of three, never felt like that growing up at all. My mum might have been knackered tho I'll ask her...

Pootles did you enjoy being one of three? I am an only child and I thnk that is part of the reason I want a big family and the fact my ovaries scream at me every time I think about small things - doesn't even have to be babies! I have to admit I am more up for it than my husband who is a content man he is one of two so thinks our children are in a good position. He is concerned that we will be overstretching ourselves with three because we are on our own etc but by the time the third (if it comes along) my eldest will be at school ;-(

I did, still do! But having said that we're planning on keeping ds as only child, but that more to do with money and the fact that I found pregnancy, birth & newborn stage incredibly hard.

So long as you're ok financially I can't see a problem tbh. Do consider that you might just be a very broody person - might you still be broody after having a third?

I think being one of three definitely had something to do with us wanting/deciding to have a third DC. I am middle of three and DP is oldest of 3. My parents did wonder at us having another as they thought three was hard work - they had 3 within 38 month whereas we have 3 but the oldest is 6 now so the older two are that bit more independent/helpful.

I do also wonder though Pinky if you might just be a broody person? I am not and never have been so all our children have been pragmatic decisions.

I don't think there is a right answer but I hope you find one for you and your family.