TTC - trying everything - only see hubby @ weekends

[SarahMargaret]

Hi, new member - first post all advice welcome This is our third month trying, which may seem too soon to worry, but I guess because I've never been on the pill or any medicated from of contraception I thought it would happen right away. I'm 25, hubby is 27, both healthy weight, active and eat well. Problem is and this is where I hope someone can give me some hope.... he works in Newbury and I live in our home in Ireland, he commutes, flies out Mon morn and back Friday evening. So we only have weekends to actively try. For the first month we had been using KY but heard it can kill sperm so switched to Conceive Plus, I find it very hard to not use anything. My periods are irregular ranging from 30 to 37 days, last month was a 32 day. My GP has done blood tests for iron or thyroid issues, but they came back normal, she has said if nothing happens within another 3 months I can come back and see her, I want a baby so so much I have no patience and daydream about seeing a positive pregnancy test all the time. As I said, any advice would be really appreciated, thanks xo

Hi,
Maybe you should start using ovulation predictor tests (opk's - as you'll see it abbreviated on here) they can give you a sign that you're about to ovulate (ov) they're used like a pregnancy test, you test urine and if you get a line that's the same or darker (preferably darker) than the control line then it means you should OV sometime in the next 12-72 hours. Which can be handy to know if your DH works away. So say you got a positive result on a thursday night - you need to DTD (shag) as much as poss as soon as he gets home on friday and hope for the best:)
It could be good for you to do especially as your periods can be 7 days difference. I've not had a problem with this so it's just from what I've read - you can research.... but the Luteal Phase (LP) of a womans cycle is usually the same every period...eg- between 12 and 14 days - so it starts after ov and lasts until AF (aunt flow-period) comes.... so on your 30 day cycles, if your LP was say 14 days that would mean you should ov around day CD16 (cycle day 16) however, on your 37 day cycle you wouldn't ov until CD23 which is quite a big difference. Or it could be a LP defect making it last longer - but that's something for the Dr's to test you for if you don't fall pregnant after a period of time.
Sorry I've rambled :) Hope you don't mind the abbreviation explanations too, just you said you're new and I know I struggled with them :)
Good luck x

I second opk. My DP and I were apart during the week when we were trying for a while. The really helped me work out if we were missing the opportunity or not and therefore prepare myself to hope for a bfp or not. Also look out for fertile cervical mucus (google ewcm 'egg white cervical mucus) as you can spot this a few days prior to ovulation. Timing can really play against you if your apart. Luckily DP was in driving distance and on three occasions drove especially to try and get that egg to meet sperm :-) also try and do the deed almost as soon as you see each other and before they leave. I remember getting into bed and struggling to stay awake a few Friday nights waiting for him to arrive so we could do it as soon as he got home late. Fun times :-)

So thankful to you both, I got some ovulation sticks to be trying trying them every other day atm as ov calenders are telling me Fri 8th will be around my ov day im hoping so as hubby will be home then :) are you both trying or have u been lucky already xx

Ok this might be tmi, but as I said ovulation calenders are telling me I should ov around the 8th, this morning I have the slippy clear mucus, is it likely that by Friday I will be at the fully fertile stage(have the more cloudy egg white mucus) if so I am super excited and can not wait till Friday :) :) :)

Everyone is different in regard to what CM they get before the fertile EWCM - I personally get a little more but more clear before my fertile stuff comes but some women don't see any or it's the same as other times in the cycle.
When the opk's tell you yes - check your CM to see the difference.

I'm in my 2nd month of TTC, It's my #4 but will my partners #1, It's 14 years since I was last pregnant so it feels like the first time :)

Good signs. Watch the opk as well. People get ewcm anywhere from 2-7 days- the last day you see it being the day you ovulate. Sperm I think can live for a few days inside you and take a little while to swim to the right place. Eggs live for I think only 12 hrs or so can't remember exactly.
It sounds like you will be in a good place Friday but to be on the safe side I would waste no time dtd when you see each other.
Good luck

the opk Im using gave me a faint line for positive so going to do another one on Friday, feeling pain in my right side and pretty tired so I think ov is on the way but hopefully not till Friday. Thanks ladies... good luck to you both too, will keep you posted xx

Gutted OPK gave a positive result this morning, but hubby isn't going to be home until around 9 tomorrow night does anyone know how long after positive OPK ovulation actually happen or for how long afterwards could conception happen? I hope we haven't missed another month x

Oh dear. Still worth a shot on Friday night I'd say. Also if you dtd Monday morning could be a small chance. I often found knowing I might ave missed it made af arriving less stressful than thinking something was wrong.

You def could have a point there, I'm glad I know for sure that I actually ovulated thanks to the test sticks, its reassuring. We last dtd on Sunday evening around midnight so if hubby has the Ferrari of sperms, there might still be some live ones knocking around in there which would be amazing!!!! :) Going to try loads all weekend, someone on this said that sometimes even after a positive on the opk, it can be 2-3 days I'll be saying my prayers :) xx

The OPK gives you 24-48 hrs warning usually, and the egg lives for 12-24 hours, so you are definitely in with a shot this weekend.

Given that the KY was probably impeding things the first month, you have only really had two proper goes at this. I know it's difficult but you really need to relax a bit.

Thanks EuroShaggleton I will def be making the most of this weekend, your so right I do need to chill. I wish I was born with patience lol :) Thanks

I'm not the most patient person (understatement) but I am having to learn - 28 cycles and counting for us and we have dtd during the relevant time for every one of those cycles. Anything up to a year is normal. Because of your timing issues you might not even have given sperm a chance to meet egg once yet!

My dh works away all week so I can understand your frustration. Nothing like ov'ing on a Wednesday when they're in Glasgow or somewhere hundreds of miles away! We've been ttc for 5 years now, completely unexplained.

It sounds like you'll be ov'ing tomorrow if you got a positive ok this morning. Good luck! :)

Feildfare Yeah Chris is in Newbury so its a flight away from Ireland, no other way to get to him. Although we dtd on a Sunday night as late as poss, and a Friday night as soon as we can. I hope the egg can hang on in there long enough, I'm feeling a lot of pain in my right side. 5 years unexplained, Im so sorry to hear that :( suppose you have tried everything x